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Christmas Giving Dilemma

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Kittye Tue 08-Nov-22 23:48:24

Every year we’ve spent a fortune on presents for our family. This year however, instead for all family aged over 21 we’ve donated to the homeless at Crisis at Christmas. ( something we’ve done as presents to each other for years) . We’ve asked that instead of them buying presents for us they put a couple of things into the food bank trolley at the supermarket.
We’re now in our 70s, have all we need, so why spend money on unnecessary gifts ?
I must admit I’m going to miss the gift wrapping this year, though may wrap a couple of empty boxes to put under the tree. It just doesn’t seem right in the current situation to be spending a fortune 🤷🏼‍♀️ I have to say our family think it’s a great idea.

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ElaineI Tue 08-Nov-22 23:41:15

This sounds terribly complicated. I have just had a conversation with DH cousin's wife and we have both agreed that once nieces/nephews are adults in their 20's we will stop with the gifts and when our adult DC have families, the children get gifts but not the adults. I think this is a great idea and am glad we had the conversation. She is very kind and my DGC usually receive a Christmas gift to be opened on 1/12 - Advent calendar, or Christmas duvet cover, or Christmas blanket then a small gift for Christmas Day. We have started this now with her 1st DGC who is 1. DD1 has just passed on to the baby 2 books and a jigsaw which were given to DGS1 as a baby by her now deceased MiL. It was so nice to think that 9 years on (on Thursday) another little boy will again be enjoying them.

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crazyH Tue 08-Nov-22 23:40:49

I think the jury needs more time 😂

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NanaTuesday Tue 08-Nov-22 23:09:50

So further to the other “ Christmas Post”
Between us my DH & I have 15 ( Yes ) GC between us - 8 Children plus one newly arrived GGD ( DH) & One GGD due for me in around 10 days .
All between 25-10 Oh plus the additional Step Grandchild same age as my GS & a Step GD who has also just given birth .
It’s turning into a nightmare . TBH we had it down to some sort of fine art . Christmas Eve Boxes for the Children which I started doing many years before it became en vogue . Those individual boxes then became Family Style Christmas Eve Boxes .
In addition I have made it a bit of a tradition to take my Grandchildren to a local Panto - it varies as to who comes & this year I haven’t even got around to purchasing our tickets yet as it was such a palava last year for various reasons . I usually buy in Oct. Anyway on that note I had decided 2022 it’s not going to happen then this Wk end at a big family gathering one of the younger GD’s asked tge question re Panto . Don’t get me wrong I love taking them but had written it off as it had run it’s course , which is sad as I wanted it to be diverging that my GC could remember always going to or being dragged to with Grandma laughing the loudest lol
Anyway jury is still out on that .
But what do we now do re Gifts , it irks me that neither of my Husbands older GC 25 & 22 bother with gifts or even a card for DH . & now that DH GS has a child it’s only right that a gist is included from us for her .
Then the Step GC ( I don’t refer to them as that only for the purpose of writing this - I’m not happy with buying for them especially as last year I didn’t get as much as a Thank you for the Birthday gifts just after Christmas for the 20 yr old who has now also just 10 days ago given birth .
So , do I stick to the hamper for all the family on each side of our families that’s 5 of the 8 Children as 2 are still single & at home with their other parent .
Is anyone else in a simple situation?
Thing is I feel that I can’t treat my own GCthe ones who reside with the Step GC & who don’t say thank you have a M who thinks they should all be treated the same - whereby I don’t want to give these any thing they have their own GP & other parent . I haven’t even had a TY for the gift for the new addition last week .
Yes I feel a bit begrudging about this aspect
Help requested

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