What my 13 year old GS has requested for Christmas

As you say - another old thread. Resurrected why, I wonder?
Yet more mileage in moaning about “entitled kids today” or is there going to be a spam 🚌 along in a minute?

Marydol having just seen your post re how did thistlelass find the year old post, I looked under Christmas in forums. There are several Christmas threads from 2022 on there.

........Thistlelass How did you find this year old thread from Dec 2022

Ditto!

How or earth do they find them and why Mary-doll ? K
When I try to genuinely find an old thread t look something up it’s never there it’s Mooved

This thread is a year old.
I often wonder how posters managed to find them.

If you feel it is more than you want to spend, why not get say a Boots or Superdrug gift card? He can top that up with his own money or his mum and dad can help.

I used to have this situation with my late MIL who asked what my then teenage son wanted. What he wanted was designer clothes, trainers and expensive labelled toiletries such as those you mention. MIL thought this was too expensive and bought him cheap stuff instead, which he immediately got rid of!

I think it is best to give money in these circumstances and tell him that you cannot afford the items he suggested, but that he can put the money towards them.

My son grew up into an adult with a very clear sense of the value of money so I did something right!

This thread is going round in circles.

OP said ages ago that she had taken advice on board and would buy him the cologne.

Well you did ask what they wanted so I would just go out and buy it. If they ask for a car or a house then say no.

It depends on how well off you are, surely? And how well off the parents are? In the situation for example where you can easily afford an I pad, and the parents cant, why not? and the family traditions? No one in my family gifts more than something say £10-£20.
As for DGC, they are of an age (his choice) where the eldest gets something paid into his budding bank account, liking to make his own decisions, and I ask the parents what to get the younger ones. me and sibs no longer gift each other, decided long ago to give money to charity each christmas.

I fell for buying iPad when I complained (it was two of them) I was told well you did ask!

Fleurpepper, I don't know if you have been into a Boots store, John Lewis or other department store recently but they still have perfume counters and lots of tester bottles. Even Superdrug and Home Bargains have "brand" fragrances.

I don't think the OP has said the youth hasn't tried this fragrance. I have never seen an advert for it (maybe you have). Why are you (and others) assuming he can't make his own mind up about a smell he likes but has "fallen" for marketing?

Grannannan

You’re lucky my GC always want presents from £150 to £200 if I don’t give or buy them presents at that price my Daughter & SIL think I’m being tight. I’m disabled on benefits !!!

This I am shocked about, I would tell your daughter and sil to Sod off. Tight, you are disabled and on benefits, do not buy it for them.
I am afraid that they sound a pair of entitled horrors. I work and my Grandchildren do not get £200 spent on them by me. I would spend £35.00 on what they want though.

Fleurpepper I am a catholic, but I would not describe myself as 'devout'. As well as giving my close family presents I also buy them a charity gift - a donation to a project that is appropriate to them. For example: DD, a talented needlewoman was 'given' a sewing machine' that enabled a woman to earn her living and so on. But this is as well as other presents, not instead.

Being devoutely religious, shouldn't be at the expense of common sense.

I defy anyone to look around the house and find nothing more than they need. We all have things that we want, that make us feel good, that are luxuries - why should children be any different?

There might be someone he fancies. He is at an age when his body will be changing, and they can get a bit pongy. They are a bundle of hormones, and tend to be self-conscious with bits of cockiness thrown in.

I wear perfume when I go out, and I prefer decent stuff to the Lynx equivalent - don't you?

I cannot believe that so many grans are in favour of giving this 13 year old child a £45 bottle of perfume, or whatever it is. I'm shocked, need to find the smelling salts...........

So much easier to give gift cards to the value you can afford and then let them choose.

As long as I can afford it I buy what the GC and AC want.

My cousin is a devout Catholic who is involved in many African charities. She put pressure on all extended family not to buy presents for kids, but to donate to charity. And THAT went too far and she alienated many by doing so.

But to make kids realise how they are pressured by advertising, how this affects others around them, to get perspective a little, and how to be discreet and sensitive with others if they do get what they want, is a good idea, I believe. Those expensive 'wants' do not come out of the blue- the seeds have been planted by aggressive advertising and pushed by peer pressure, social media, etc.

Callistemon21

^The context^

Do you think a child should be told they can't have the one present they'd like because someone else might not be able to afford the same?

I don't think it works like that. Rather like my Mum telling me to eat all my dinner because children in India were starving all those years ago. It made no difference to them if I ate it or not. What made a difference (I hope) was the 2s 6d she gave me to take into school for the appeal.
I think she struggled to spare that money.

If Gin can't afford it and will go without heat or food then her DGS should be told, kindly. He's old enough to understand.

Looking at Louise in that link (she was on local TV too) makes me realise just how generous people are.
🙂

No it is not at all the same about eating your dinner and children in India. What a terrible think to say, really.

The children who do receive presents which have been 'pushed onto them but outrageous advertising' - will share the same classroom, playground and social life as those who didn't- let alone those expensive i-phones, top label clothes, etc.

The pressure on parents this year more than most, is that many children will get very little, or parents will be pressured to get into debt that will cripple them, so their children are not left behind, and possible mocked and worse, at school.

So for me, it is not about what the GP or P can afford, but also about thinking about context, and the effect on others, and perhaps show a bit of restraint.

The BIG question for me, is HOW! How did a child that age get the idea that a 30-50 quid of perfume would be a 'must' for Christmas, and that it is 'appropriate'. HOW? Do you know that the UK is one of the few countries were it is allowed to bombard kids with Xmas advertising on TV, for instance, and this from early in autumn.

They are pressured to want, want, want - and become part of this vicious circle of constant 'wants'. We should do everything to help them not become hooked.

You’re lucky my GC always want presents from £150 to £200 if I don’t give or buy them presents at that price my Daughter & SIL think I’m being tight. I’m disabled on benefits !!!

I would put it down to my budget and how many grandchildren I had. If only one and I could afford it, then yes. If many grandchildren and I was on a tight budget, then no. It is about appreciating the kindness behind the thought. My gran used to give me a £1 and from her £5 pension it was a lot of money and I really appreciated it and used to take her out in my car and she loved being driven around by her granddaughter 50 years ago.

Re drones, etc., when Gdcs have asked for impossible things (a Gdd of 3 asked for a real baby, boy or girl, she wasn’t fussy) we’ve just said that Father Christmas isn’t allowed to bring whatever it is.
In the case of a baby - or any live animal - because people might not look after them properly - besides being too cold on the sleigh, of course. 🎅🏻