Frazzled out by 3pm on Christmas Day?

Lovely to hear about so many different ways of doing Crimble! My answer would generally be A with detailed agreement about what to bring. DH is very good at clearing/washing up. The only task I can't bear to delegate to guests is putting things away - if they go in the wrong place they could be missing for months. I had one longstanding regular guest who always, when clearing plates, shot all my mother's silver spoons into the rubbish. Beseeching her NOT to clear the plates had no effect. I used to have to creep out afterwards and rescue the spoons from the compost heap. Did it for years. Thankfully, she now does her own Christmas at home.

Its got to be A for me I go to DDs house she caters for about 13/14 inviting DGCs and any of their friends who are on their own they all bring something with them from M&S .

An 'A' for me - lots of jobs to divvy out and now MiL and M no longer come it's all rather easier.

Best 'help' is from DS who turns up with a pot of his beef stew for each household to take home with them It sits very happily in the fridge for a couple of days and then heats up as a no-fuss ready meal after a decent walk.

We have both DS's and families coming for Christmas dinner this year and will be eating at about 3pm as they want to have presents at home first. They are all eager to help - and I shall let them, although both sons are not tidy in the kitchen to say the least. Both DIL's are very good at clearing up, particularly when visiting us and I must say that washing up is not my favourite job, so I'm depending on them to load the dishwasher and clean the pans etc. We are going to cook an enormous piece of beef rather than having a turkey. I have a SIL who never does anything when she visits, but she isn't coming until New Year.

I'm not doing Christmas at home this year as my DD is living abroad so I'm going to visit her in warmer climes. I used to be an A as I struggled to cope with sharing my kitchen, but then I was young and capable. Now I cope less well and have a son who is a very competent cook so I am happy for him to help, or even take over completely. He does a lot of the cooking for his family at home and mostly takes charge for occasions. DiL is very competent too but she seems to be able to let him take charge better than I was ever able to. I couldn't bear the mess my ex made in the kitchen so discouraged his involvement. I understand he now does much of the cooking for his new partner. I wonder if she has to clear up the chaos though.

I will never forget the Christmas Day my husband and father-in-law insisted on clearing up the kitchen after Christmas lunch. I sat with my mother-in-law for at least two hours, absolutely itching to get into the kitchen - I was pretty sure how it would be. When eventually I was released from my purgatory, it was worse than I thought. The really awful washing up (i.e. meat tray, greasy roasting pans etc) had not been touched. The clean washing up was all over the kitchen (because my husband didn't know where anything went) and the leftovers were not organised or put in the fridge. For the life of me I don't know what they'd been doing for two hours. My honest answer to Question 1 is, 'Yes, sit down, enjoy yourself and leave me alone to sort out this lot while listening to a nice play on the radio WHICH YOU WILL PLEASE NOT INTERRUPT!!'

All of our family dinners are a form of potluck. When growing up it was a given that if you were invited to dinner you brought a dish of some sort.
We also used to have big village pot lucks. It was great fun as you never were sure what would be there and you could always count on that one aunt to bring rainbow jelly.
As to the question my answer is always B and they can even load my dishwasher 😁

cc My husband used to take her to the pub for a nice long Campari soda or two and bring her back at the right time.

Oh how I am looking forward to the 'Long Campari Soda Years'

We always used to do the full works on Christmas Eve when our family reached teenage and beyond. Then we would chill out on Christmas Day with new books, nice salads and nibbles, chocolates and treats, very good cheese and pate and port or red wine.
When the children were younger we would have a brilliant salad for Christmas lunch with fresh salmon, rare roast beef, macadamia nuts with lots of lovely ready-made salads to go with the protein items as the children had spent the morning eating chocolate and opening presents and would not have coped with a big traditional meal. It also meant that we could relax and enjoy their excitement.
Now we are older it can change from year to year. This year my daughter has organised a shopping delivery to me and they are all coming here on boxing day. I will have the meal carefully planned and prepped up in advance so it will look fairly effortless when they all arrive. there will be 10 of us and I am looking forward to it.

I have always had to be B because of the lack of space in our kitchen.

This year, I had hoped to have our extension completed and new kitchen installed in time for Christmas, when I would definitely have been A.

Unfortunately, delays in the building of the extension means that we won't have a kitchen at all in time for Christmas, so we're going out for Christmas lunch. Although I have coped quite admirably, if I do say so myself, with a field kitchen set up on the dining table, I really can't see me managing a full-on Christmas dinner, and then everyone having to eat on their laps.

But next year..... oh I can't wait for next year, when I can have several family members in the kitchen with me. And they will ALL be given tasks

hazel93

pen50

My problem is my gluten free diet allied to my distaste for ready made gf food (almost all awful!) So everything winds up bring made from scratch by me. Tastes good, but yes, I am a frazzled heap by the evening. Nine people this year - we're having a goose. I will prepare as much as humanly possible in advance, and DH is very, very helpful.

My DIL is coeliac and I find a roast one of the easiest meal to cook for her, very little gluten involved and easily substituted surely.

My mother was coeliac so we always cooked everything from scratch, made a fruity/savoury rice stuffing and proper gravy made with potato flour. Today you can get Mrs. Crimble stuffing which is lovely, though I've not been able to get it for a few weeks. Much easier to get nice GF sausages now too.
We used to make trifle with home made custard, bottled cherries in kirsch and amaretti biscuits instead of sponge.

I used to be absolutely knackered when my four children were at home. My mother came every other year and I found her too helpful, I couldn't find her enough things to do. My husband used to take her to the pub for a nice long Campari soda or two and bring her back at the right time.
My youngest daughter and I take it in turns to host now, this year I'm cooking the meat and maybe the veg as I have two ovens, she is doing a starter. She will also do breakfast as she prefers her children to open their presents at her house.
We have a M&S white chocolate and passionfruit roll on order for pudding, it looks lovely, just have to hope they don't let me down at the last minute as has happened before. One of my sons is coming too, but we try to avoid him cooking as he eats a lot of pulses and veggies which might be a bit much on Christmas day!
We'll see our other children on different days, we've not had a full family Christmas for quite a few years now which is probably easier.

We never have Xmas Dinner on Xmas day but usually in the week before. Then presents and visiting grandchildren is free for the afternoon
Always done it this way as our children ate far to much sweets and chocolate to enjoy a big lunch and very excited about presents on the actual day. We have a cold salad and cold meats buffet on Xmas day.

Not on Christmas Day but we usually have large gatherings between Boxing Day and NYD, I was always B, then one year I asked people to bring things, a salad, a quiche, that sort of thing. Despite telling them what to bring, two couples were constantly asking questions. It drove me nuts! Made worse by the fact the couple who were bringing the quiche bought it in frozen and it was really deep so needed defrosting. Another couple bought a cheap desert that looked like it had been kicked around. Since then I’ve reverted to B.

pen50

My problem is my gluten free diet allied to my distaste for ready made gf food (almost all awful!) So everything winds up bring made from scratch by me. Tastes good, but yes, I am a frazzled heap by the evening. Nine people this year - we're having a goose. I will prepare as much as humanly possible in advance, and DH is very, very helpful.

My DIL is coeliac and I find a roast one of the easiest meal to cook for her, very little gluten involved and easily substituted surely.

Is there anything I can do?
Would you like any help?
Can I bring/make dishes/desserts/sides?

My answer to the first to guests staying her for Christmas is,
'yes, please keep your things in your own room, not in the rooms that we are all using.

You may make dinner tomorrow (Dec.23rd) your choice of food
Help with the washing up after all meals

Bring your own drinks.

I learned years ago to delegate, to do as much as possible before the 22 nd December - that is put up the tree etc. get boxes for Christmas decorations back up to attic, prepare food in advance and either freeze it or leave in the cold somehere, suitably cat-proofed.

Have a rest in the afternoon of Christmas Eve, which is the big day here.
Insist on having time to go to church

Christmas is only fun if properly planned.

My problem is my gluten free diet allied to my distaste for ready made gf food (almost all awful!) So everything winds up bring made from scratch by me. Tastes good, but yes, I am a frazzled heap by the evening. Nine people this year - we're having a goose. I will prepare as much as humanly possible in advance, and DH is very, very helpful.

GreenGinger

Always a B. But honestly, I mean it! I love the atmosphere and hustle and bustle and excitement of Christmas Day. This year we are on our own, so will miss my family immensely 🙁

That will be me next year GG !

Always a B. But honestly, I mean it! I love the atmosphere and hustle and bustle and excitement of Christmas Day. This year we are on our own, so will miss my family immensely 🙁

Since moving we are now a fair distance from family. Having catered for 10 - 12 for decades it is sheer relief now, only us DS DIL and 2 children to feed and next year they will be at her parents.
Nonetheless I will be frazzled by mid morning let alone 3pm !

I would love someone to ask that! I would suggest something, I’m sure. I live alone and the work and expense of playing hostess so often, with no help whatsoever does grate sometimes. I have a largish family and have to be extremely well organised (and indefatigable!) to make it work. I do (mostly!) but a little help with things, not least the offer of a dessert or starter, would be lovely. I have asked in the past but have been faced with people turning up empty handed. (‘Forgot’-panic!)Anyway, this year it will M&S to the rescue! (Or Tesco, depending how generous-or rich-I’m feeling…!)

It won't be a very big clean M0nica, but I did notice the other day that there are still some cobwebs (leftover from Hallowe'en) that really should be gone by now!
Plus it'll be the first time some of my friends will have seen the house since we had it renovated after our fire, so I'd quite like to give a good impression!

For Christmas itself we're going to my daughter's, so that's easy 🙂

V3ra Why do a big clean just before christmas, visitors or no visitors. While a thorough clean can be very satisfying, I doubt anybody else notices.

Much more sense to do it after Christmas wen the decorations are down and the visitors have all gone home.

Not Christmas Day, but some friends wanted a low-key Christmas get-together.
Rather than decide where to go, transport etc I've said I'm happy to host it, but suggested we do a bring and share evening. Everybody's happy with that.
Now all I have to do is clean the house 😬

Greyisnotmycolour, I agree that it adds to the festive atmosphere, lovely to have a mix of ideas and input too!