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Coronavirus

AIBU to go abroad for a few days ?

(72 Posts)
Bald1 Sat 14-Mar-20 11:15:43

I'm due to go to a family funeral in Germany. My partner won't come due to the coronavirus risks of flying, and would prefer me to stay at home too. I feel l must attend the funeral at all costs. Am l being selfish ?

Lancslass1 Sun 15-Mar-20 10:46:33

Please stay at home.
Perhaps you could go to your local Church or even somewhere quiet like your garden at the time of the funeral and spend a little time thinking about the person who has died.
I send you my condolences ,Baldi.

NannyG123 Sun 15-Mar-20 10:46:22

I'm sorry for your loss Baldi, but seriously I wouldn't go. I'm sure you can remember your loved one in your own private way, at the same time the funeral takes place. You may get they're and not be able to get home again. Stay safe.

Phloembundle Sun 15-Mar-20 10:38:00

Why on earth would anyone with a modicum of sense get on a plane to anywhere at the moment?

GracesGranMK3 Sun 15-Mar-20 10:34:03

My son came over for my mother's funeral but my brother (75) did not. If it had been a week later my son would have been on his own in the spare bedroom when he got back as he would have had to self-isolated.

It's an awful decision to have to make but thinking about coming back is important.

Rachand Sun 15-Mar-20 10:25:17

My DH brother died in Spain 9 days ago, he had to make the decision to go or not knowing there had to be a number of c19 cases in the town there. In the end he didn’t go as he was worried about catching it. Sad, but safer!

grannypiper Sun 15-Mar-20 09:56:37

It will make no difference to the deceased if you are there or not.

Witzend Sun 15-Mar-20 09:55:03

A very good friend’s husband died about 9 days ago. Haven’t yet heard about the funeral, but we were planning to go and stay overnight in a hotel or B and B - it’s about a 2 1/2 hour drive away.
I dare say it’s a pretty safe bet to say we won’t be going now.

polnan Sun 15-Mar-20 09:47:33

Of course it is not an easy decision to make.. my prayers go with you and all.

if it is the deceased person you are thinking of, I am sure he or she is aware... and yes,, very hard.

imo the best decision you could make

Moggycuddler Sun 15-Mar-20 09:46:57

Stay at home. These are not normal times. I am sure the person who passed away would understand. If it was someone close, have your own private little ceremony here at home.

Mtc59 Sun 15-Mar-20 09:24:47

Very sad and disappointed to pull out of our holiday to algarve at last minute. Decision made after speaking to our friend who has a very popular beach front restaurant. Portugal has not yet closed its borders but is likely to especially as manySpanish are crossing into Portugal. Our friend has closed his restaurant and says clubs,bars and businesses closing locally. We just had to be sensible. So sat here, suitcases packed but still at home.

Authoress Sun 15-Mar-20 09:23:06

Stay home. Cases are doubling every day.

JackyB Sun 15-Mar-20 06:52:35

Bald and harrigran the choice will be taken from you. Like several other countries, Germany will probably be closing its borders as from this weekend.

Bald1 Sat 14-Mar-20 22:17:25

Thanks harrigran and Tangerine, you're right, l've decided it's better to stay at home.

harrigran Sat 14-Mar-20 20:14:25

I have a funeral to attend next week and am a little worried. It is a church service then at the crematorium, afterwards there is a meal at a hotel.
If I have any doubts on the day I will not attend, most of us have health issues and are at risk.
I have a sick relative in Germany too and praying I do not have to travel in the present situation. The relative has lung cancer so is vulnerable.
I would stay at home if I was you, the deceased will not know whether you are there.

Tangerine Sat 14-Mar-20 20:08:45

I meant "would" understand.

Tangerine Sat 14-Mar-20 20:08:28

I am sure your deceased relation will understand.

Bald1 Sat 14-Mar-20 19:07:57

Thanks for the advice, varian and Ellianne.
I won't be going now - a difficult decision, but 100% of posts think it's best not to.

varian Sat 14-Mar-20 18:08:39

Just don't go. You would be puting yourself at risk, particularly when travelling.

Ask yourself whether the dear departed or any of your other loved ones would want you to come to harm.

I'm guessing the answer is NO, so don't go.

Ellianne Sat 14-Mar-20 17:57:17

What a hard decision to make Bald1 but you're doing the right thing.
I like Niobe's suggestion about holding a memorial service at a later date.

Bald1 Sat 14-Mar-20 17:49:07

JackyB - That sort of confirms my fears, and it's probably going to get worse before it gets better. Thanks for the local info.

Bald1 Sat 14-Mar-20 17:23:15

Niobe, Namsnanny, Maggie, Blueberry - thank you for all your good advice. I think l would be daft to ignore all the collective advice posted here- so l'll stay home.
Travelling abroad seems to be getting more difficult by the hour due to corona lockdowns - l'd hate to get stranded away from home- or worse get ill.
My partner will be pleased too - that l've come to my senses at last.
It's probably the hardest decision l've made for years x

JackyB Sat 14-Mar-20 17:13:46

I live in Germany. Absolutely everything is cancelled - e. g. all church services. People are being told not to attend funerals (I will have to forgo one myself next week) unless closest family.

Bald1 Sat 14-Mar-20 17:08:33

Calendargirl - yes it is a cremation, that's a good idea about the video feed. Thanks.

BlueBelle Sat 14-Mar-20 17:02:37

I, not sure you ll be in any more danger in Germany but I wouldn’t travel simply because I d be afraid of not getting back and I can’t think of anything worse than be stuck for weeks or even months away from home

Namsnanny Sat 14-Mar-20 16:39:35

Condolences Bald1 bad luck. Difficult circumstances, plenty of good advice that I would follow though