Very needy 'needy' neighbours!

This is one of the reasons we moved to a place without neighbours.

I’m very lucky our neighbours are great!

I think it is a very difficult situation and hard to deal with for everyone. Luckily, I loathe my immediate neighbour and so do not have that problem. He is the nastiest person on the planet.

I still walk my (3) dogs at 7am and again at about 5. My daughter (the only one here at the moment) does the longer walks.

Today I HAD to go out to the chemist - just about the furthest I've been (other than my allotment) since this started and then decided to go a bit further and get some fresh bread and a newspaper. I was absolutely stunned at how different everything is/looks.

The big pub in my local high street has been boarded up (?) and all the other shops with 2 exceptions are closed. The bakers insisted I pay £1.20 for a loaf with my debit card....there was a queue outside the posh butchers but other than that - it is all very "science fictiony".

I lost count of how many empty buses passed me and decided it was safer to get home that way. Only one other passenger and both he and the driver were wearing very heavy rubber masks. I've been making do with my silk scarf!

Very weird.

I think this potentially deadly virus, the restrictions on everyday life and lockdown for most has brought out the very best in some people and the very worst in others. In these uncertain times it would be nice to know those that needed help could get it and those that don't need it would stop abusing the kindness and generosity of others. Maybe some people are so wrapped up in their own thoughts, fears, needs and wants that they have forgotten how to think of those worse off than themselves - maybe some really don't care, as long as they are OK and have everything they WANT they don't give a stuff about those who NEED. My better half has limited the times he has left the house for shopping and getting my medication even though he suffers with cabin fever being stuck indoors - on those rare outings he also gets a few bits for a neighbour and an elderly customer and drops them on their doorsteps and rings them from the car to tell them to wipe everything down as they bring it into their homes. Most of us are doing our best either to help others, to not make demands on time or resources of others, but sadly there will always be those with more selfish streaks happy to snatch things away from those who need things more. Post-Coronavirus might be a very different world to the one we knew, and we may think differently about people who have behaved appallingly during this crisis. Stay safe everyone and don't be bullied by demanding neighbours, friends or family members.

sazzl and Chewbacca it’s the local Nazis round here. I expect to find gangs of them roaming the streets with machine guns shooting first and asking questions later. Somebody posted a photo of a car and it’s numberplate demanding to know who it was as they had parked and walked their dogs. Another called police on two occasions to report unauthorised family with children living at a house. Turned out they were checking for a friend. Will the rifts ever heal?

My neighbours have not been out for about 2 years now. They are only in their 30’s but both have chronic fatigue syndrome. When I manage to get a shopping delivery, I put a note through their door to ask if they need anything desperately. They have a microphone and camera door bell. I ring it when I leave the shopping on the doorstep and they pay the money online into my account. They are very grateful for my help and I feel I am doing a little to help.

I know what some are saying about the very elderly and their food choices. I think it's because they are not out there and don't realize what it's like with the long distancing queques and the desire we all have to get what's necessary and get back to the [relative] safety of home asap.

1 am in general very lucky with my own mother. She is 89, still drives her little car locally and day time only and is in general as independent as possible. She and her next door neighbour, an elderly widow like herself, are in lock down together, going nowhere and are company for each other.

When I first said I would be getting a shop in for them once a week when I did my own, they were a bit like some of the people mentioned in previous posts. They wanted ready meals and puddings from m and s, their bread from Morrisons and certain brands for everything I have stuck to my guns though and they now understand. They can write things down and if they are not available I will bring substitutes. If there's anything they definitely don't want substituted eg Kelloggs Cornflakes they write that down as well.

I honestly don't think they mean't to be difficult ...more to do with having no clue what it was like out there. They watch the news and hear from others by phone so the penny has dropped and I always get lots of thanks when I manage to drop off what I could get at the end of the drive.

I think that in my mother's case it's more worrying what her friend will eat as she has been ill and mother herself is a lot less fussy. I did hear that friend hadn't liked the Sainsbury's choc eclaires I had bought as a substitute for the M and S one's her friend preferred but I have remained firm and explained that I am not going to take unnecessary risks in pursuit of specific brands. I did go to Marks one week for my one and only shop so I could incorporate a few treats and ready meals they like. I guess I'm lucky with her really

Nah then, as you should be aware by now, I am BLIND and so, therefore, I must use assistive technology in order to use the computer. I have a heart problem and diabetes type 2 but there is nothing to be gained by complaining.
Sure some folk (thankfully the minority) who are just grumpy self-serving pratts but hey there are some nice folk around too
@H1954 I wish you all the best at this time

Put your right hand on your left shoulder
Put your left hand on your right shoulder
Now squeeze real tight
You just had a Virtual Hug from Me.

actually i think he's looking for someone to talk to. i looked at all the comments .maybe a bit of compassion here. thinking he must be elderly .well maybe he is needy .need someone to talk to.like me a few weeks a .about mountains out of mole hills. i can now see that its not that .its people not washing their hands(i always did) and dirty work surfaces. britain has and always be slow at coming forward. look at our hospitals .always been a bit grubby...i can seeyour point .my neighbour who is practically housebound had her neighbours who are able bodied ask if she could get their groceries online because she is classed as sick and disabled. grrrrrrr....whats wrong with the husband suitable togged up to go to tescos and get the food required...

nice one gustheguidedog

Thank God.

I live rural ..

I have meet my neighbours once in 3 years only to be invited to join there revolution against a crematorium.

Take it they have there own wings and gate ? lol..

We have only lived in our close of 20 houses (4 of us dont have other houses across from) so it can feel quite out on a limb. We're now the eldest, both over 70 but so far we're the only onesto enquire of our neighbours (from a distance) if they're ok! DD phones to ask if we're ok or need food but as they have a very new baby I would never ask her to shop for us. DH collects our regular essential meds from chemist (one in one out) as they're online repeats but we still can only have one month at a time! I have ordered seeds online for veges & seed potatoes as we have a medium size back garden. The young couple next door always eager for what we grow but never do anything with their plot yet they now have the time (and the books on how to get started I passed on to them because they asked for advise) my gardening is hit & miss, give it a whirl see what happens variety. We can't get a home delivery slot from any of the 3 supermarkets Ive tried & tried but I was able to get a meat delivery from a scottish firm online! And I managed to get birdseed online too. I disinfect our doorhandles in/out twice daily plus taps & loo flush buttons I even spray the doormat in our porch because the delivery folk have to drop things there. Im just glad I no longer have to sjop for my parents - they were so pernickety & nothing I did was right and I don't drive, I'd to fill a rucksack with the tins/bottles & bags for the rest, phone again before leaving the shops for any last minute items but I could guarantee the minute I got home there was the phone call to tell me about things they 'really needed' or 'just fancied' even though I had those meals delivered - it was a control thing. They refused all other help. I worked ft and had a disabled adult son. It wore me down. So I can really empathise with those kind souls trying to help others.

I am very lucky to have wonderful neighbours. Most of us have lived here for years. We aren’t always in and out of each others’ houses, but know that help is there for the asking.
In spite of that, my 92 year old next-but-three has twice sneaked out to the shops, and been spotted struggling up the road with heavy shopping bags. We are all worried about him, but he wants to be independent and won’t accept help. He has adult children living nearby too.
I must admit that I would also hate to lose my independence, but I am only 80, and very fit for my age. My GD has dropped a few things in for me, but I am managing fine.
I don’t know what it would be like to have such difficult neighbours, and you have my sympathy. It must be awful to have to try to dodge these moaners. People like that don’t realise that they are their own worst enemy, and will result in them having no friends at all.

A kind friend of a friend is doing shopping every 4-5 days or so. I ask her with a list by email, I try to stick to 8-10 items only, what she kindly brings back, is what it is. No bread yesterday but other items ok. Locusts had cleaned out the local supermarket of bread.

I found on FB a local greengrocers delivering fruit and veg boxes, they are now delivering to hundreds of extra homes.

The supermarket I have been having home deliveries from since 2008 won’t give me another slot.

But I am very grateful for what help I am receiving.

52Bright I found your post very enlightening, I think I have been guilty of thinking that the shops look the same as they did last time I went shopping 2 weeks ago.
We are lucky to have a good neighbour who has been shopping for us. When I have given him our requests, I did put certain brands etc. because I genuinely thought that it would save him having to wonder which kind of say, bread, to choose for us. Since reading yours and other posts on here i will give him a much more generic request next time.

Your neighbour could have some form of dementia perhaps? My father was never like that until he developed vascular dementia. After that he behaved in exactly the way you describe your neighbour doing. He had no empathy or understanding of our position and why we weren’t able to care for my mother who had advanced Alzheimers and him with the vascular dementia. Yes, it was extremely draining.

Think there will be a lot of previously hidden / unknown mental health issues coming to the fore for a lot of people during this crisis

I hear people on here saying the supermarkets should place limits on food purchasing; I agree in a way, but the problem is that I’m now doing voluntary work and am shopping on and off for 7 people at the moment. I have an essential worker pass in case I get stopped by the police for being “out” too much. Perhaps the supermarkets should supervise people’s purchase and prioritise those shopping for the elderly and isolated.

Hahahaha, Glamma, thought you'd twig. Honestly, those free hampers are for the very vulnerable who have no family to do their shopping. It's her nasty demanding ways that she can't see herself that upsets everyone, as though she's the only one suffering or on the planet even.

I'll be struck down talking about people but I'd tell her to her face too.
Glamm, you're kindness itself just like your dear John.x

Any one else wondering on here why the supermarkets have still yet to catch up with the initial panic buying. I’m guessing some of their production staff might have gone off sick, but surely there are huge swathes of the community now not working that could step into their place (if not temporarily). My friend in Manhattan reports no queues for food, no shortages, everything is available. She even goes to a specialist UK shop and can get stuff that’s not even on our own shelves! I’m tempted to ask her for a food parcel?!!!!! (; x

One more quick point. I’m a relatively young gran, so don’t qualify as being “elderly” ........... can I just say one thing to those that are “elderly” and who can get access to the supermarkets before the rest of us; please don’t moan. You’re very fortunate, the rest of us have to scrum around with the others trying to find what we want from what’s left. I’m so sorry to means you have to get up early, but is that such a hardship?

Picturing CraftyCat like Tom Cruise Mission Impossible trying to outwit the neighbour. ??‍♀️??‍♀️??‍♀️??‍♀️??‍♀️??‍♀️

Ilovecheese. That is very thoughtful of you

Well it is true that in times of need you find out who are good friends and neighbours, and who are not.

Never ceases to amaze me about how wrong you can be too, until it happens.

We have a WhatsApp group going for our road, and neighbours are helping each other. It's kind and comforting in these unsettling and strange times.
However - my temper rose yesterday on reading that some hospital patients have complained of 'brutal' treatment . I read on; each patient is being obliged to use a commode behind their cubicle curtains because using the ward lavatory has been deemed unsafe - it can't be completely sterilised between patient's visits. What do they expect? Perhaps two members of the nursing staff might leave sick people and spend their time hovering outside the loos at the ready with a steam gun and anti virus spray every time someone decides they are too dainty to use a commode. I wouldn't find this so irritating if they were being asked to use a chamber pot, on public display in the car park, but for goodness sake!