Frustrated with parents!!

I am feeling very angry reading these posts, don't they realise that the hospitals are finding it difficult to deal with all the cases and medical staff are risking their own health. They are having to distance themselves from their families as they are exposed to the virus. Tell your parents to stop being selfish and only thinking about themselves and STAY AT HOME

Op,

Is this the first time your parents have been so unreasonable? I doubt it

I'm afraid DH and I were doing exactly the same thing. I am 68 and DH is 73. Neither of us have any underlying health problems. We thought our grown up children were being over the top when they told us we shouldn't go out. DH decided he was not going to stay in and would still be going out to the shops but would make sure he followed the social distancing rules. We decided not to tell them we'd be going out a couple of times a week to get some shopping. My Daughter in Law phoned to ask if we needed anything and I let slip that we'd been in to town to M&S. She was so upset and made me promise to stay in. I felt so bad. We'd been behaving like a couple of naughty children and I decided there and then to do as she said. Trying to convince DH was another matter but I finally got him to see that it was because they love us and to them we are old. I have since found out from my daughter that our Grandson was worried that we would be going out. I actually don't mind staying in because I can find plenty to do with my crafting hobbies and the garden to sort out.

Whatever our motives I think this lock down is turning us in a nation of spies and it’s nasty. How long before we start ringing the authorities to report people and are we thinking of ourselves just as the offenders are?

Sorry but I think they are both absolutely pig-ignorant. I am 69 with a heart condition and I know if I caught this virus it would be very dangerous for me and if I was taken to hospital I may just infect the very people who are trying to help, THE MEDICAL STAFF. I do not venture out at all at this time of self-isolation except a nice stroll around my garden for a few minutes several times a day[ and it is a small garden ].I have seven key workers [ 3 of them nurses] in my family and it is people like this ignorant couple who are a danger to them. No matter what their age they are just down-right selfish, thinking of nobody but themselves. It is NOT a case of not being beaten, and carrying on, it is a case of "If we want to go out we will go out". If they do catch the virus and end up in hospital it is people like them who just clutter up the beds because they did what they wanted to do. Not one thought of the other people who could just as easily catch it of them, medical staff included. This makes me so very, very angry and if they do catch it they will have nobody but them selves to blame BUT they and their family will expect the hospital to do all it can to help them.

They should be reported, I would for one because it is ignorant people like them who are spreading it.

Well said MamaCaz, As for not being afraid to die geekeesie I am of an age that agrees with that. But I do fear the run up to death because I have witnessed it. I intend to avoid death by Coronavirus if I can for that reason, but more especially I would hate that my selfishness might cause another person or health worker to suffer that. Stay indoors if at all possible.

@Rosalyn69
Wow, are you really that stupid that you honestly think that reporting people who break the rules is ‘nasty’?

What is nasty, no downright criminal, is allowing such behaviour to carry on unchecked.

Is the fact that potentially thousands in the U.K. are going to die all alone, without their loved ones even being allowed to say goodbye, not enough for you to cop on?

My friends have a daughter who was working as a nurse in an ICU and now she’s battling the virus. She’s alone, they can’t visit her and they are very scared. She has two young children.

The hard fact is that people flouting the rules are increasing the numbers of others getting infected.

It can take up to 14 days for symptoms to appear so they could be infecting hundreds of people without knowing that they have the virus. Yes, they might get very ill and die but thats not the end of it.

How many other innocent people have they infected during those previous 2 weeks?

Really, it’s no different to giving them a gun and saying ‘just shoot a few random people whilst you are out shopping’.

Would that be ok?

If they have a deathwish, so be it. Older people can be quite stubborn and fatalistic. Unfortunately, their actions will have a negative cascade effect on all involved if they get sick
I feel bad for the healthcare workers and shop assistants dealing with people's selfish idiocy. Maybe print out these comments and mail them over to them.

Reading this thread has at least helped me feel I am not alone! I have a 97 year old mother, who is very fit for her age, walks every day and hasn't dementia. However she IS 97, broke her hip a few years ago falling over her cat (I found her and can never forget finding her freezing cold and in terrible pain; she wasn't wearing her alarm so couldn't call for help) and now walks with a stick. But she is DETERMINED that she is fine to carry on, insists on still driving her car etc. Her memory has got incredibly bad. She stayed with me for a few months as she and my brother were buying a house, and I tried to be as helpful and loving as possible, but after being here for a long time I discovered that she hadn't brought the charger for her phone or her alarm. I was so upset and got into an argument with her. Unfortunately my brother seems to think the rules are all nonsense, and they are driving out to beauty spots. I think they are social distancing though. Every time I phone her (every other day at the moment) in the conversation she will tell me something she has been doing that isn't okay or that shows she doesn't know the current situation. I've been through the 'protecting other people' with her ad nauseam but she always goes back to the 'I've got to die of something' mantra. I phoned her today and she told me of a lovely walk she had taken to the local reservoir and gone down some steep steps and back up again afterwards and was feeling quite proud of herself. We got into an argument AGAIN because I couldn't help asking what would have happened if she had fallen. She tells me that I'm treating her as an imbecile, and obviously thinks I'm being totally unreasonable. I'm getting so stressed and worried about her, but I think I might have to just not phone her for a while. I don't want to spoil her last years or stop her doing the things she loves, but sometimes I feel like saying to her 'You're very lucky to have lived so long and it's time for you to think of others and follow the rules!' Her favourite mantra is 'I must, I can and I WILL!' Sorry to have gone on so long; just feeling so upset.

Maybe they will get a fine for flouting the rules. That would probably give them the shock they need.

It may be the coping mechanism as everyone is different . At least mobility doesn't seem to be an issue . You can catch it however careful you are . Not ideal but a short walk - we are still alowed out for up to an hour maybe good for their mental and physical health .

Know or find somebody wearing a Uniform and get them to have a word. You don’t need to get more stupid as you get older just more responsible?!

choughdancer

Dont apologise we're listening even if she isnt.

Exactly what May7 said . This is not your fault choughdancer . You can’t force an adult to do the right thing you just have to hope they do .

Incidentally I have just had a call to say a relative of mine has died of CV . Not someone I was in anyway close to, but a relative none the less which really hits home .

What a cheery thought.
I am nearly 75years old.
So, if I get ill with this virus, I won’t be resuscitated .

Great!!

That’s made me feel even more paranoid now.

You don't have to have underlying health problems for this virus to kill you.

Greciangirl, all the more reason why you should remain " locked up ". I'm in the same boat but older though I understand that if a younger person can be saved then we've had our lot. DNR's are being " managed " but not in force, I don't think.

I feel your frustration, personally I am not afraid of dying for whatever reason but I won’t go out now, because I could be responsible for someone else’s death, either by passing on the virus or taking up valuable NHS resources meaning someone else has to wait. I have the same situation with my adult daughter who lives at home, I’ve tried telling her but she says she can’t cope at home, she has mental health problems, Although we live in the same house I can’t physically stop her, she knows I wouldn’t be able to cope if anything happened to her but what can you do?
I’ve send my mum (in her80s) some things to do at home and photos to keep her spirits up and am phoning regularly along with my siblings so she has some kind of interaction. Do they have a garden? Maybe send some seeds to give them things to do safely.
Wishing you all the best of health xx

Tuppence15 I really feel for you. This is how I think my own mum would have behaved had she lived to see this. I am grateful that she is not going through this and that I am spared trying to support her. All I can say is please take care of yourself and your own mental health. If that means having the odd day off, take it, and explain to her why you need to. I wish you all the best.

Everyone will get the chance of being ventilated if there are enough ventilators. There have been some very unpleasant unauthorised letters going out to vulnerable people and they must not be signed. At a time when there is so much fear, a section of society are turning a bit Germany 1930s on us and adding to the terror. The BMA and GMC are very much against what some GPs are doing.

choughdancer
I think you need to take the car keys away from your mother. She's far too old to drive. That's utter selfishness. She won't be able to kill others with her disregard for lockdown nor will she be a danger on the roads.
You need to do this asap.

I have an 84 yr old uncle lives about 30 mins from us he lives on his own in sheltered accomodation. He keeps getting on buses to go to the shopping centre jus to get out of the house,even tho he's got a couple if shops next to were he lives. In the end I pleaded with him almost begged him not to go shopping on a bus. I think he now understands that not only is he putting himself at risk also the driver of the bus. He now promises me he won't get on bus to shopping centre .

Social isolation is seriously affecting people's mental health. Go careful what you put on the internet and what you say to friends. My sister's friend took an overdose the other night after ringing her, because she was so lonely and had received nasty comments online after going for a walk. She's ok as friend rang 999 and kicked the door in. Friend blames herself for telling her off about going out as she's vulnerable. TG the ambulance came quickly.
Nobody knows how low some people are feeling so be kind and keep nasty comments to yourselves.