Refusing to wear a mask

"Trophy Wife" oh what a lovely way of addressing your daughter in law and mother of you grandchildren.

In the grown up world of relationships that I live in, we think part of being grown up and a sign of a healthy relationship is discussing issues, stating opinions, being challenged and disagreeing. I’ll repeat again, he brought the issue up and should therefore have been prepared for a response.

Good God he is a grown man and old enough to make his own decisions. Stay out of it and say nothing! That's his opinion and he is entitled to it. I personally feel the same and do not wear a mask but I do not visit shops and have shopping delivered. It has been overhyped and the figures come from those who have been tested, they have caused the figures to spike. The people tested haven't got it now. I have several friends who work for the NHS and even though they make a big fuss on the news about the Hospitals being busy, it could not be further from the truth and hospitals are empty. My local one only had 8 patients in last week. Say nothing to your Son or you may regret it.

If you told him that you had decided not to wear a mask, what would he say?

I like this:

My son in Australia is a bit of a none believer too. We have just agreed to not talk about the subject. Our calls are usually short and sweet and I would rather discuss my granddaughter than the different world we are coping with at the moment

It’s curious. I’ve read on this thread about people not wearing masks in the U.K., but in my neck of the woods everyone in shops and on public transport seems to be wearing them.

I am in Scotland though where our First Minister Nicola is respected and listened to on the pandemic. Even by those who are against her politically.

Does anyone know if wearing a mask with a filter makes any difference? I have acquired some masks with a supply of filters. Will those make me - and people around me - safer?

I’d be cross with my son but agree with others who say there’s probably no mileage in getting into an argument about it.

My oldest son and family live in the US but they all wear masks, as do pretty much all his friends and his in-laws. Not everyone in the US is like Trump!

kwest I will most certainly be taking your advice. ?

If I was your son I would be more angry about you labelling his wife, the mother of your grandchildren, “a trophy wife” ?

I was out for lunch a few weeks ago listening to one of the men go on & on about not wearing a mask cos he looked like a highway man! I said better looking like that than with tubes coming out of you. I didn't argue with him, I just made the comment and carried on eating. He now wears a mask....

Interesting point Dylant1234 when he brings the subject up I’m going to use that tack. Thank you.

Say nothing. He is an adult and entitled to do what he thinks is right. An adult should not have to defer to his mother's opinions.

Your son is an adult and as such has the right to make his own decisions.

I well understand why you think he has made a wrong decision in this case, but you are likely only to make him hold to it more stubbornly if you criticise him.

So don't bring up the subject again. If he mentions it, say quietly that you will need to agree to differ about wearing masks as you and his father intend to keep on doing so.

He's a grown up.
They are their children.
Don't give critical feedback unless they ask your opinion.

I wouldn't say anything. Do what you feel you should do so far as your own behaviour is concerned and leave it at that.

There are so many different opinions - even among experts - that I'm of the view that washing hands, keeping safe distance, not mixing in big groups, wearing masks on public transport and in shops, and - as much as possible - avoiding crowds should be the basic steps that most people should try to stick to. People who feel they are especially vulnerable or who are just very nervous are free to limit their activities even further but it is my view that too many restrictions are causing massive problems in other areas, including in referrals for other serious illnesses.

The US is proud of its independence and hard-won freedoms.

Alas, we in the Britain have become an island of snow flakes, scared of our own shadows. Our ancestors would be so ashamed of us.

He sounds wealthy enough to have excellent health insurance so, like Trump, he’d get top treatment. If the subject comes up again naturally in conversation, (and I agree with other posters, don’t raise the issue yourself) perhaps you could say that you’re concerned about the millions of poor Americans without health insurance. As in this country, it is they who are actually supplying the better off (who can stay safe within their walls, big gardens and second homes) with all their food and services. The least he can do is wear a mask for them when out and about enjoying his life.

Why do you have to say anything? It’s his choice, just let it go.

leyburn

Well said Esspee, we are being scammed big time by the so-called experts. This is all about control, not the virus.

I don’t understand what you are saying here ?

Whatever you believe....???‍♀️

People who read the papers and watch the news have been hoodwinked I am afraid. I totally agree with him he has probably read the science. I am 66 with a husband with heart failure who is delivering to the public. Neither of us are listening to Sage as the people on there are not qualified to issue this nonsense. Yes people did die which unfortunately is a fact of life but most had underlying conditions and would probably have died with flu.
If you can try and follow Mike Yeadon he is an immunologist and has studied this for 30 years. There are mostly mathematicians on Sage unfortunately and not many who understand it.
I too was brought up properly like your son but I believe he is using his common sense.

I have friends who refuse to wear a face mask and I believe the best way is to ignore their stand and still be kind to them. They may just come round?

andymorris Have you ever remonstrated with male passengers over their non-wearing of masks, or have I missed that? Apologies if I have. What was their response? I note that you say the females you spoke to all got off the bus - as usual, it would be interesting to hear their version of the exchange. And in your first post it sounds as though you swore at one - I would find that intimidating.