Gransnet forums


Losing the plot on support bubble rules....

(49 Posts)
Luckygirl Sat 19-Dec-20 10:37:54

I was at one time clear that only people living alone could form support bubbles, but it seems it has changed from Dec 2nd - I completely missed this. I thought the point of it was to avoid the depressing effects of being alone all the time, but now big families can bubble as long as one of the children is under 1 or disabled, or a load of other tings as below:

^You can form a support bubble with another household of any size if:

you live by yourself – even if carers visit you to provide support
you are the only adult in your household who does not need continuous care as a result of a disability
your household includes a child who is under the age of one or was under that age on 2 December 2020
your household includes a child with a disability who requires continuous care and is under the age of 5, or was under that age on 2 December 2020
you are aged 16 or 17 living with others of the same age and without any adults
you are a single adult living with one or more children who are under the age of 18 or were under that age on 12 June 2020
You should not form a support bubble with a household that is part of another support bubble.^

I cannot keep up with all this!

BazingaGranny Mon 21-Dec-20 11:08:57

Well, we were going to join my sister in law in her garden, and have mince pies, and warming mulled wine, etc, for brunch, but now we are in Tier 4, we will be at home, the two of us plus our lovely pets, and I am rather bizarrely looking forward to it. Our children will be happy with their respective partners and their own children, and friends and relations seem to be happy in their own homes or bubbles.

I don’t know anyone planning to break the rules, I may know a boring lot of people, of course, or perhaps just sensible and pragmatic people!

I think one gran on here wonders whether to stay overnight with her daughter, and in her position, on my own, with a cold dark drive ahead of me, I would certainly stay there, it seems to meet the criteria (although it’s rather galling to think of oneself as ‘vulnerable’) and I think that the constabulary, Scottish or English, will agree it’s perfectly acceptable.

Seasons greetings everyone ????

ReadyMeals Mon 21-Dec-20 11:12:48

Remember, if you're in a support bubble for any of the reasons that applied earlier in the pandemic, you CAN travel to be with your bubble and you CAN stay overnight, and hug etc. That's what bubble means.

freyja Mon 21-Dec-20 11:17:48

These support bubbles have driven us mad. I live with my DH in tier 2. My DD also tier 2, wants us to stay over night but before Christmas day, to spend time with GC. We have had to leave before her MIL come because we were not in her support bubble. Her eldest son(16)our GS, is also in his father 's bubble and will see him via train, over the Christmas period. The whole family have since September been to work, school and nursery whilst we have been isolating. Anyway with these complicated arrangements made, everyone knew who was going to see who and when.
Our other children, in tier 3, said very firmly that they are not seeing anyone and my DD is not being fair putting this much pressure on us as we are over 70.
Anyway apart from averting a family WW, I think I started one. As from Saturday all children went into tier 4 including my DD but we remain in tier 2, so all plans are cancelled.

We are now not talking because as far as DD is concerned her arrangements remain the same. Her son will go on the train to see his dad from tier 4 to tier 2 because he can. We can go from tier2 to tier 4 because we will be in her support bubble
We of course and the rest of the family have said 'no' as none of it can be done and we are staying safely at home. What a mess.
I just BJ cancelled Christmas long ago before arrangements were made. The important is to stay safe so we can share next Christmas together.

4xGranny Mon 21-Dec-20 11:29:45

My DD, her husband, DGS aged 3 and 7 month old baby had planned to visit SIL’s family 200 miles away for the 5 day Christmas bubble. After Boris’s announcement on Saturday I messaged her saying how sorry I was that she could no longer go. She replied that they were still going quoting the support for a child under 1.
I’m so angry with her. They are fit and healthy and have never needed any support for either of their children.
I’m also worried that someone will report them. They live in Tier3 and are travelling to tier2.

ReadyMeals Mon 21-Dec-20 11:33:07

4xGranny don't worry about them being reported. The police have said they have no intention of snooping around who is in what house.

rowyn Mon 21-Dec-20 11:35:00

I think that this just show that people are interpreting the rules in their different ways/ or thinking that their particular circumstances mean that they can consider themselves an exception to the rules.
I'm no big fan of lockdowns and tiers, but think we just have to toe the line and do as we're told for the time being.
I consider myself lucky that , assuming they stay symptomless, my younger daughter and partner will come for ( a draughty windows open ) lunch, then go. I live alone , am in tier 4, but. according to am allowed to see them on Christmas day as my support bubble.

SuzieHi Mon 21-Dec-20 11:52:39

We’ve changed plans- daughter & partner in tier 4 can’t come; other daughter & family who are local ( we’re all in tier 2) had invited us all to go to them. Husband & I have pulled out from that too since the news of new strain of virus. We think we are safer to stay at home. Have offered to see them in the garden for Xmas bacon baps & exchange of presents. Has caused upset /friction- they won’t accept the Turkey i said I’d provide or offer of Xmas pud. They’re now off to buy their own. Get the feeling they are annoyed with us & think we’re over reacting. We know they’ve been mixing and breaking rules to suit themselves - ie hairdresser in house with no masks; meeting other mums from school ‘for coffee outdoors’ ( pub marquee) not 2 metres apart, visiting other relatives and friends indoors.....

olliebeak Mon 21-Dec-20 12:04:53

I'm in Merseyside - so we're in Tier 2. We've no intentions of doing anything differently from what we've done during the past few weeks.

YES - we'd love to see my 3 AC and their partners
YES - we'd love to see all 7 grandchildren
YES - we'd love to be able to see our own sisters/brothers their partners/nephews and nieces

..................... but we can't squeeze all those into ONE DAY while trying to keep ourselves - and everybody else - safe, healthy and well.

It IS what it IS!

We will have 'distanced gift giving' with ACs ahead of Christmas, so that the grandkids get their gifts in time.
We will phone people.
We will Zoom chat with grandkids.
We will have our Christmas Lunch.
We might go out for a stroll (weather and mobility issues permitting).
We will relax and watch TV - which we deserve after all the prep for 'the Christmas that Never Was' ...........................

..............but most of all, we will continue to look forwards to better times ahead for all of us!

Luckygirl Mon 21-Dec-20 12:05:23

I am sorry that your family cannot accept your decision with a good grace. We all have to make our own risk assessments.

My DDs have accepted my decision with no problem, I am very glad to say.

Jillybird Mon 21-Dec-20 12:29:36

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Natasha76 Mon 21-Dec-20 12:32:50

I think if you needed a support bubble you would go looking each time there is a change. We have had to do this for my father each time.
Its always best to look at the rules rather than rely on others who may only have been listening to what matters to them.

sazz1 Mon 21-Dec-20 14:09:04

A single person with or without children under 18 can form a support bubble
A household (ie more than one adult over 18) with a baby under a year old or a disabled child under 5 is also allowed to form a support bubble. HTH

rowyn Mon 21-Dec-20 14:29:08

Oh well - about an hour after I posted on here, got a phone call from daughter to say that her partner has got the virus and she's not feeling great. So no Christmas lunch together.
My 3rd Christmas on my own in a row so I'm used to it, but feel sorry for them.

WOODMOUSE49 Mon 21-Dec-20 14:37:32


Oh well - about an hour after I posted on here, got a phone call from daughter to say that her partner has got the virus and she's not feeling great. So no Christmas lunch together.
My 3rd Christmas on my own in a row so I'm used to it, but feel sorry for them.

Take care rowyn. I hope you have a lovely long chat with your daughter on Christmas Day.

I'm sorry, it's taken someone to get the virus to make them then follow the restrictions. I hope her partner recovers to 100%.

fraz1946 Mon 21-Dec-20 14:42:34

Well said CarolAnne. In the context of an entire life one strangely different and possibly lonely Christmas is surely something to simply accept and get on with. There are many many others who always have solo Christmases. My cleaner for example. She is Phillipina who has spent 20 years working in UK and remitting all her money to her family in the Philippines. She has worked her fingers to the bone to educate her four children and has had every Christmas on her own since arriving here. Let's all just get on with making this year end work as well for us as we can. We shall all meet again and love can still be in our hearts for each other even if we cannot meet.

rowyn Mon 21-Dec-20 14:43:19

They have been following the rules - you must have misunderstood what I said.

SusieB50 Mon 21-Dec-20 14:59:27

I and my DD and family support bubble are in tier 4 . We decided to carry on with Christmas Day but not my DS and family obviously? . They have bought quick results Covid tests and will test on Christmas Day to be safe ,although they have all been isolating for 10 days+ following a contact with Covid anyway. DS and family will be alone for Christmas but I’m sure they will make the most of it . The children of both families have been so good all year in and out of quarantine bless them .

Milo27 Mon 21-Dec-20 16:29:44

Runner bean wigwam! Love it! xxx

GrannyRose15 Mon 21-Dec-20 19:32:56


The message from HM government is for a very good reason to keep us all as safe as possible and not to overload the NHS.
We should all be making a few sacrifices this year to protect others as well as ourselves. One different christmas day will not make such a big difference if we all pull together for the common good.
So come on everyone get a grip on things and enjoy your christmas' in the best way that you can.
Hopefully next year will be different.
A very merry Christmas to you all.tchwink

In 2019, there were 530,841 deaths registered in England and Wales, in 2018 there were 541,589 deaths. Covid or no covid that means over half a million people in this country will not see another Christmas. What are we doing as a nation denying these people the comfort and joy of having their families around them? Have we lost all our humanity?

GoldenAge Mon 21-Dec-20 22:07:13

Grammaretto - an exception can be made for you - you are a vulnerable person as a recently bereaved lady. Sorry for your loss. You definitely shouldn't be alone over this Christmas.

Grammaretto Tue 22-Dec-20 07:31:12

BazingaGranny I am much more relaxed about it now. I can always hide my pyjamas.
I am also relieved not to be anxiously trying to cook a turkey dinner for 20 people.
It should be lovely to see the DGC opening their presents and some of the rituals intact. However, I must promise not to be too disappointed if plans change again.

larry5 Tue 22-Dec-20 15:32:19

My Ds was supposed to be coming to stay with us in tier 2 as we are his support bubble but he is in tier 4 so is unable to come. He is a teacher and sent school finished in Friday he has been notified of 2 positive tests in classes that he teaches so he wants to keep us safe.

We are meant to be going to dd for Christmas day but she has had a text today from her childminder that she has covid and so has her son who dgs was in close contact with last week. Dgs has a cough to has been tested this afternoon but the person doing the test said that they are unlikely to get the result for 72 hours.

We are now self isolating as we did childcare for dd over the weekend when dgs started sneezing so we might well get it if he is positive and although dd was supposed to cook lunch I have the turkey in my freezer to get out tomorrow. Fortunately we live 4 minutes walk apart so we can exchange food parcels on the doorstep. I will of course drive, wear a mask and ring the doorbell and stand back.

trueblue22 Tue 22-Dec-20 15:37:52

I'm in a support bubble with my dog!

My son can't be with me because he's been seeing his gf, who is on another household. My daughter can't because my gd's teacher has Covid & she's isolating until 26th Dec.

I'm taking this a day at a time and just filling my time walking with friends on the morning, otherwise I'd go crazy!