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18stone 18 year old gs

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NickyD47 Tue 11-Aug-15 17:13:54

I am so very worried about my gs who has been overweight since about 6 years old. He is getting bigger and bigger since school finished as he awaits his A level results. He plays on his computer all day and most of the night, in his room. When he was younger I tried to tactfully say to my son and his wife that I was worried but my dil said she had been too and he'd lose it as he grew taller. He hasn't.
The fact that she has trained as a personal trainer and eats sensibly herself makes me so angry. She & my son have divorced now & although he sees my gs weekly, and is worried too, my dil won't do anything to help. I have a good relationship with my gs and have told him how worried I am and that if he decides to try to lose weight I'll do all I can to help. I've even tried saying I'll put 50 pounds in his bank account for each half stone he loses but he has no confidence in himself, and no willpower now. What should I do?

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Luckygirl Tue 11-Aug-15 17:46:55

You may find that there is a weight loss clinic at the local hospital, or even the GP - he needs someone alongside him to help him. Once you get that big, you stop caring and eat for comfort. What a worry for you.

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glammanana Tue 11-Aug-15 18:10:43

HI Nicky What a worry for you and your son,I suggest trying to get your GS to go with his dad to see his GP where there is a programme run from most Surgeries for healthy eating advice they run for about 12 weeks and some even give free admission to sports halls/swimming baths etc and whilst there he may meet some new friends,I wouldn't try to say I'd pay him for every half stone he loses,but say when he reaches a reasonable target weight you will take him out and treat him to a new wardrobe of clothes. best of luck

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NickyD47 Tue 25-Aug-15 17:08:51

Thank you all for your support. I'm hoping that getting merit star in a couple of btecs will give him a boost, and suggested to my son that he consider asking my gs to come and live with him for a while as gs has now left school and only has an occasional job at weekends. Son said he had already thought of suggesting it. Son could do with losing a few pounds and they could support each other in an area where gs is incognito. Hope it happens.

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NotSpaghetti Tue 25-Aug-15 18:29:35

Don't now much about it but the NHS has a weight loss 12 week plan. You can sign up online (so "secret") and they have help and advice, and I THINK support if you want it.
If he uses the computer this might be ok to start him off - as in some ways it's familiar territory and he can be anonymous.

Also, if quite a bit overweight, he should lose the first few pounds fairly easily which will give him confidence and might encourage him to continue.
Maybe his father could check it out ahead of suggesting it....
Good luck.

Self esteem is a tricky thing - my youngest daughter is liable to put on weight VERY easily - a weekend away with friends, parties or a stressful/late week at work (leading to take-away dinners) might be all it takes. Now, at 26, she knows just what to do to put it right, and also how much better she feels when she's a bit slimmer. She doesn't actually "yo-yo" - just feels her jeans getting tighter - and then sorts it out. She just knows that she is SO much happier when her clothes fit well and that she has to act accordingly if she doesn't want to be miserable.

I know this doesn't sound much fun, but she is a happier and more confident person now than she has been since a teenager - and, as she says, she eats well and sensibly mostly, and when she doesn't, that's her choice.
I wish your family well and hope your grandson finds a way through.

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