Thank you - so funny!
Last letters become first - March 26
Gransnet forums
Dieting & exercise
A friend shared this on FB and it made me laugh.
“Banned from Sainsbury's Supermarket.
Didn't like shopping there anyway. Yesterday I was at my local Sainsbury's store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Winalot Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now
enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. I'm now banned from Sainsbury's.
Better watch what you ask retired people.
They have all the time in the world to think of daft things to say 
Brilliant Maw cheered me up on a cold wet morning.
Of course I realise it's a joke! No need to worry on my account Urmstongran
Not heard that one before so thanks for the giggle Maw. And thank you for the snigger Billybob; your response was almost as funny!
. Love it!
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