What is the most random school memory you have?

I remember being given the cane on the palm of my five year old hand for it being stained by green walnuts. I still had red welts when I got home. My mother didn’t complain.

Some years later at boarding school I got detention for cleaning a single shoe of every pair of a visiting hockey team, who all had filthy shoes. We had a shoe inspection every morning before breakfast and you were in big trouble if you couldn’t see your face in them.

In 1968, just moved up to the big school aged 11?…I remember being in a classroom and the random thought suddenly hit me - that if I lived into the unknown future, 32 years hence, with no idea what my life would hold, that by year 2000 I would be aged about 43…it seemed a surreal idea.

And here we are 26 years beyond even that date now.

To this day (60+ years) I have a memory of the disgusting smell of macaroni cheese, wafting up to school from the dining hall about 100 yards away, mid to late morning.
Their lunches weren't great, but were at least edible, but that macaroni cheese both smelt nauseous and looked like the cat had just got rid of it. The tuck shop did extra business on those days!

Being press-ganged into singing the 'School Song' at morning assembly: it was a silly song that made little sense and the first line was "Let folly praise.......". It was one of those anachronistic Victorian Loony Tunes, completely out of context in The Swinging Sixties.

SynchroSwimmer

In 1968, just moved up to the big school aged 11?…I remember being in a classroom and the random thought suddenly hit me - that if I lived into the unknown future, 32 years hence, with no idea what my life would hold, that by year 2000 I would be aged about 43…it seemed a surreal idea.

And here we are 26 years beyond even that date now.

Yes! When I left school in 1970 I remember distinctly thinking "and when it's the year 2000 I'll be 45 - that's ages and ages away....."

And here we are in 2026 and the year 2000 is ages and ages behind me. Blimey.

Padstow13

Oh, a boy in my class taught me how tie my shoelaces properly. We were six and I thought he was fantastically clever for his age. I've been grateful ever since.

In infant school my job every day was to tie the shoelaces of a boy in my class who couldn't do it himself. At the time I thought he must be very stupid.
When I had children my own daughter mastered shoelace tieing in half an hour, but my son took a few years! I gave away his shoes with laces, little worn, and bought ones with velcro fastenings as I didn't want another child to have to do it for him as I'd had to do! He certainly wasn't stupid as he is now a university lecturer with a PhD!

I moved to the local Convent for the last two years of primary school. One of the first things I remember was a little notice on the class noticeboard announcing the release of the Beatles new record "Twist and Shout".

jocork I can remember visiting my cousin when her cousin Michael from the other side of her family was staying. He was sitting on a dining chair swinging his legs and calling "Mummy, Mummy, please do up my shoe laces".
I did them for him and remember telling him he should be able to do them himself, he was a big boy now.
He was seven, I was five.

When I was in primary school in the 50’s my teachers were men and I think they were returning from the war. The classes of 40+ of mainly boys were never disruptive, art was always male oriented, fire engine etc.
I never was punished although some boys were. I think of Ian Grinstead got the worst but I never knew why.

Throwing yellow powder paint over a bully!

My experience has never left me. I was 7 at the time and accused of scratching a boy on his cheek. I was sent to the headmasters office and received the strap across both hands, despite saying I had not done this. I was distraught and the total injustice of it all has stuck with me.
My parents were fully aware that that was not the type of child I was and that I have never had reason to lie. My parents always drummed into me that the consequences of honesty are far better than those of lies. Even now writing this stirs up the emotions felt due to the injustice. Following that, the same boy used to horribly grin at me.
My father did go to the school and told the headmaster in no uncertain terms, “I don’t use violence at home so you will never strike my daughter ever” I had never seen my parents so angry before.

I can remember a junior school teacher being keen to keep us out of the classroom at lunch. The main reason being he liked to smoke his pipe and didn't want to be seen. Of course, the smell of tobacco gave it away and he decided to go off in his car at lunchtime and smoke. Nice enough man, but I remember being taken home sick by him and his Fiat 127 was full of pipe cleaners and St Bruno tobacco.

Being told at parents night that I would be lucky to get a job in Woolworths. That was in primary school.🤷‍♀️

There was a tremendous amount of cruelty inflicted on children when I was a child .
Two of my male friends were savagely beaten at home for absolutely nothing .
My Mother decided to send me to an old fashioned school run by a neighbour's Aunt .
She and her deputy were both monsters.
I used to feel physically sick as they lashed out with their canes.

At the end of my first year of school, we were called to assembly to meet our new class. every child was called and moved into the next row leaving me sitting all on my own because my parents were able to get me into the same school as my sister which had not had a place that year. Trauma!

Being tall at an early age, I was given the only large desk in the school. Being shifted to squash into a smaller desk when one of the boys had a growth spurt.
Desks were in pairs, and undertaking a handwriting competition and my desk sharer was deliberately fidgeting to spoil my work (jealous)

Getting 10 out of 10 for my victoria sponge

Knitting dish cloths out of string.

The pipe smoking teacher I mentioned above was probnably the best I ever had. While he could lay the law down when he had to, he was never cruel and rarely hit pupils, so was both respected and liked. I can remember him introducing the class to classical music, and playing records like Beethoven's 5th symphony and the 1812 Overture and explaining the music to us.
OTOH I went to secondary school and had a total horror of a PE teacher, who used to delight in hitting and humiliating unathletic pupils. I was glad when I found out he died.

Being told in a whole school assembly to go and wash my lipstick off. I was 11 and didn't actually have any on.

Cadenza, a similar thing happened to two friends of mine. One was told to wash off her ridiculous blusher by our Headmistress. My friend had bad eczema! The other friend was told that it was appalling that her parents allowed her to bleach her hair at her age. She was 11 and had natural, very blonde hair!

Having a ruler across my knuckles also having to staying back at lunch time to finish a cold cheese and onion pie .I still do not like cheese and onion pie.

Seeing a teacher give an out of control trouble maker six straps of the belt. On the 5th, the girl opened her hands so that the teacher belted her own legs! On the 6th, the now very angry teacher lifted the belt back with such force, it flew out of her hand and out of the open window behind her. True story.
I should add, the out of control trouble maker nowadays would hopefully have been talked down and definitely NOT have been belted thank goodness.
Personally I once received 6 of the belt from my maths teacher for genuinely not knowing how to do my homework. I gave up maths asap and just did Arithmetic, at which I was very good.

Being whacked with whatever implement came to hand
Beating up the school bully when she attacked me for no reason.
Shouting at our vile racist headmistress aged 6 when she bullied my friend for wearing a polio leg iron.
Throwing pudding at the above when she tried to force feed me.
Doing a Maori reenactment production as our dance and drama teacher was from NZ.
Dissecting the school guinea pig after it died (Thanks Miss Zymanska)!
Catapulting peas off a spoon at school dinner time.
Final years; Sneaking down the pub at lunchtime & finding 4 teachers in there.

When I was in top infants the boy next door told me that when we went back to school after half term I would be in the next class up in juniors with a scary older woman teacher. I was petrified. Of course I was not,but I spent the whole week scared stiff. When I did go up after summer holidays there was a new teacher in that class who was young and kind, Miss Craven.

The Royal Navy were giving a presentation at school for fourth and fifth formers. I can remember someone quite loudly making an inappropriate comment about an attractive Wren and getting a really harsh look back and being marched out the presentation by the head of house. Wonder how many times this happened as a lot of the lads afterwards said the Wren would be one reason to join up.