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Estrangement

Great. At least it all becomes clear.

(33 Posts)
Lavazza1st Fri 04-Dec-20 16:48:24

After initially mentioning that the parcels were here, I left it two weeks before mentioning it once more. I won't be mentioning it again @Hithere

It does seem very strange... and I'm not making the effort if they don't make the effort.

Hithere Fri 04-Dec-20 16:42:45

So he knowz where his parcels and not interested.

I would stop contacting him and his wife.

Lavazza1st Fri 04-Dec-20 16:40:35

They came from a well known store @Smileless2012 but Mr Lavazza accepted them without thinking. I did think about asking the store if they could accept them back but I suspect they would want a receipt and obviously that would require cooperation from our son ( not likely)

I sent Christmas cards today and have a date in mind by which I will be posting Christmas gifts to GC and perhaps them ( I can't decide if I should include them or not ) if I don't have satisfactory communication from them. I feel it's best we plan for Christmas without them.

Our EAC aren't out of mind, I know.... unfortunately. I'm not going to beg or chase him, though. I know we deserve better than being baited, punished, ignored and put through the wringer. I think my son wants to be chased, but I won't play those games.

Smileless2012 Fri 04-Dec-20 16:23:30

Is there a return address on the parcels Lavazza if so you could always message him and say if he doesn't come and collect them, you'll send them back.

I hope you'll now be able to organise your Christmas without having to worry about whether or not they'll turn up.

Unfortunately the parcels, like our EAC may out of sight, but rarely out of mind.

Lavazza1st Fri 04-Dec-20 15:07:22

@Toadinthehole You're right. He does not respect me and has made that clear. He has even told me to my face, claiming it's "because you're divorced". I have now put their parcels out of sight. flowers

@Hithere yes. He said it was an accident and really wanted them. But when I offered that we would drive over there and he could come and get them from the car he said he didn't want to see anyone. It seems he's told his wife that he messaged us and we didn't reply so making it "our fault" that they didn't get their parcels. He is still refusing to talk but at least she gave me some explanation, although they could both be playing games.

At least the parcels are out of sight now (so I will forget them in a day or two haha) and I know not to make an effort unless they make an effort.

Hithere Fri 04-Dec-20 13:07:16

So your son knows their packages are being shipped to the wrong address and he has made no effort in picking them up?
Did I get that right?

Toadinthehole Fri 04-Dec-20 12:58:04

Aww, bless you, what a mess and upset for you. I spoke to you on your last thread about all this....and still would encourage you to spend time, not just Christmas, but always, with the people you love...and who love and respect you back, as I’ve no doubt your son loves you, but for some reason, the respect has gone.
I’m glad it’s clearer now, and I hope you have a peaceful Christmas. Perhaps next year, you’ll be able to start again, but for now.....relaxation is the order of the day ?

Lavazza1st Fri 04-Dec-20 12:49:00

I finally messaged my Daughter in Law because of their (numerous, heavy and bulky) parcels which came here by mistake- I messaged my son 2 weeks ago to arrange pick up with him 2 weeks ago he said he didn't want to see anyone. After that he ignored me!

I found out from her that she thinks he has messaged me. He hasn't. I messaged him again today and he's definitely ignoring me.

So, I have come to the conclusion that he wants to cut us out of their lives and is lying to DiL that it's US ignoring them. Such a lie! Or it could be both of them not wanting to be in contact with us, but pretending it's the other one. Not sure what to think, but the ball is in their court now.