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Estrangement

For All Mums On Mothers Day ( Estrangement)

(36 Posts)
MBM Sat 13-Mar-21 06:41:21

As tomorrow is Mother’s Day l realise how painful it will be for Mums who have no contact with their Sons, Daughter’s
or Grandchildren .
For me it’s only been three years but l realise for many it’s much longer.
I could never have imagined the pain estrangement brought l miss my daughter and my beautiful Grandchildren so much .
There was no argument just a new partner who took control within a few months , the last card l had from her was a few weeks before he moved in saying ( Mum if I’m half the Mum you are to me , , l will be a Wonderful Mum . thank you for always being there for me ) l have tried to contact with no response, presents returned and now they have moved and l don’t know where she or the children are .. l have no family and just a few friends who live the other side of the country.
I can only pray one day they will contact me when they are older. Each day l hope & l pray that her and my grandchildren are safe and happy
Yes Mothers Day will be dreadful and each one seems to get harder.
I hope all Mums who are going through this can find some kind of Peace .
Take care & stay safe
Nana 2

Yoginimeisje Fri 19-Mar-21 08:22:57

MBM sorry about your sad situation flowers
Very similar to mine, but mine's been 8yrs now. From being very close and loving, to NC what-so-ever. Don't know where they live either, I know the area, but not actual add.

Yoginimeisje Fri 19-Mar-21 08:13:58

Annniebach so very sorry for the loss of your DD flowers I remember when it happened and we did pm each other at the time.

Littleannie what a terrible thing to say to you, really shocking! I had similar from my estD.

Armadillo Wed 17-Mar-21 10:27:59

I didn't have a good mum but if I did I would make mothers day so special as it should be flowers for all the good mums who don't deserve nothing for mothers day.

Sparkling Mon 15-Mar-21 05:32:08

Whiff,what a dreadful thing your son has done, let's hope he lives to regret it and tries to reconnect. Meanwhile, you do have family you are part of and support you.
Annie, so very hard to lose a child, can't imagine the pain. If estranged just to know they and alive and well is what's important, we just have to let them be.

Whiff Sun 14-Mar-21 12:34:42

Anniebach my heart goes out to you. I grieve for my husband even after 17 years. But the loss of child must be unbearable. Your grandchildren and son in law must miss her terribly. After my husband died what gives me comfort is his DNA lives on in our daughter and son and 5 grandson's.
Your daughter lives on in your grandchildren. I hope that gives you some comfort.

LittleAnnie how wicked of him. I hope you have blocked his number. Last text I had off my son was to tell me he sent an email and not to contact him. That was May. Only other communication was a vile letter he sent with all the unopened birthday cards and presents and birth card and presents in August. Not hear a thing since. If he ever does decide he wants his mother back in his life I can never forgive him or trust him ever again. I would rather have silence than receive anymore vile emails or letters.

Luckily I have a wonderful daughter, son in law and 2 grandson's. My other 3 grandson's are lost to me. Unless they want to know me when they grow up.

??????? to all mom's

Madgran77 Sun 14-Mar-21 12:16:56

Annie I dont get the impression you have caused upset. Mother's Day is a hard day for some mothers for many reasons and each person feels the pain for their particular situation flowers

Kandinsky Sun 14-Mar-21 11:19:10

I must admit I agree with Annie.
As much as it hurts living with estrangement ( and I do ) at least my child is alive and living quite happily.

nanna8 Sun 14-Mar-21 11:09:54

OMG Littleannie, that is wicked. He must be sick in the head. Some of my grandchildren I don’t see that often but usually on Mother’s Day we go out with some of them who live nearby. Our Mother’s Day here is 2nd Sunday in May.
? and ? for you Littleannie.

Anniebach Sun 14-Mar-21 11:02:58

Didn’t mean to cause upset, just saying an estranged child can live their lives as they choose even if it we are cut out of their
lives, we give them life , it’s their life .

Pain when we bring them into the world and pain if we have
enforced separation from them. It’s being a mother , not one of us would choose not to have had the joy of their childhood
or the dreaded teens !

seacliff Sun 14-Mar-21 11:01:21

Such sad stories, they make me weep. I don't understand how some can be so cruel. I am not in that position, but my relationship with one has deteriorated, and I do worry how it will go in the future.

Very best wishes and hugs to all who are sad today. flowers

Madgran77 Sun 14-Mar-21 10:36:31

Annie ??

Littleannie Sun 14-Mar-21 09:32:40

The last text I had from my son, a few months ago, said "why don't you die? The sooner you die the better. Nobody will miss you". I have 2 grandchildren.

Redhead56 Sun 14-Mar-21 09:23:57

To all mums have the best day you can❤️

Septimia Sun 14-Mar-21 09:20:27

Love to everyone who finds today difficult.

Susan56 Sun 14-Mar-21 09:19:59

Annie?

Anniebach Sun 14-Mar-21 09:05:32

Please forgive me for this, I ache for all who are estranged from their child.

I have two daughters, received a card from my younger daughter this morning, will not receive one from my darling elder daughter, she is dead .

How I wish she was alive , with her husband and three children, I would struggle with being estranged from her but
she would be alive living her life .

I send hugs to all x

Whiff Sun 14-Mar-21 05:24:23

Hope everyone gets through mother's day the best way you can. My daughter and gang will be round this morning. Luckily we are eachother's bubble. So I get to see them weekly. But today is also the date of the last time I saw and held 2 grandson's with my son..The eldest features probably haven't altered but of course he will have grown. His brother's features will have altered and his hair might have changed colour and he will also have grown. It's a year and children change so much. They are 4 and 2 . The baby I like to think looks like they did as babies. The only photo of him is a 20 week scan. Wish I knew his name and date of birth.
Been plagued with nightmares the last 4 nights . I know why it's because of today. I am very good at analysing why I feel things. I have had nightmares since puberty but since moving here these are the first ones.

??????????????? For mother's everywhere.

Madgran77 Sat 13-Mar-21 19:35:34

To all of you who are facing an estranged Mothers Day flowers

And to those who fear that this will happen to them in the future, despite their best efforts, flowers

Mother's Day is a day that highlights so many feelings around estrangement

Jennyluck Sat 13-Mar-21 13:56:56

Agree with you Smileless2012, all the things we did for them, not because we had to. But it was all done because we loved them. My ES told me, don’t expect me to be grateful for anything you’ve done, it’s only what any parent would do.
I knew then our relationship was over.
I’d never have said that to my mom. I knew she’d always done her best for me, even though my dad was constantly ill.
I think some of the esc have no conscience.

tinaf1 Sat 13-Mar-21 13:45:56

Although I do read a lot of estrangement posts I have never posted before ,

? ? These are for you MBM and all the other mums & dads who are going through this it can happen in any family, thinking of you all especially with it being an such an horrendous year.

Smileless2012 Sat 13-Mar-21 13:26:27

It's an awful thing to have to live with MBMsad. For me anyway the pain has eased over the last 8 years but mother's day always feels like a kick in the teeth.

"Every mother's day advert has seemed to mock me" I used to feel that way too Whiff but I now see it's or ES who is being mocked.

Everything those adds say is what we did for our ES, what you did for your EAC and what all the EP's who post here have done for their children. One of them in particular apart from 'you always stood in goal for me'; nope never did that but plenty of everything else and more beside.

lavenderzen Sat 13-Mar-21 13:14:54

For all flowers So very hard xx

sodapop Sat 13-Mar-21 13:11:18

Such a sad situation MBM I hope you are reconciled in the future thanks

NellG Sat 13-Mar-21 12:07:13

MBM from my heart to yours flowers

Namsnanny Sat 13-Mar-21 12:05:58

MBM ... what a sad sad situation flowers
Thank you for posting as I expect a lot of us are feeling at a low ebb, I know I am!♥️