Anyone else waiting for a very elderly abusive parent to go?

Yes your mum could live til 100 or more, or not. No one knows. Live your life and stop counting what she spends, it’s hers to do with as she wishes.

It doesn't sound as though your mother has done much for you in the past so it's unlikely she will in the future.
You owe an abusive parent nothing so don't let her carry on spoiling your life.

Difficult i know & awfully hard to deal with these emotions
Because you are a good caring soul it bothers you pls remember that
Might it help talking to an outsider? I was too proud
I decided in the end that Love conquers all type of thing. Nobody is perfect no, but when you are hurt underneath it hard to deal with emotions think mum daughter the hardest
Hope you can find a route to not let this effect you bitterly maybe write it down and ad ‘but from now on I’m going to …..
I ended up rising above it and remembering better times
It becomes a habit then

Apologies if on wrong tact for you but beats getting bitter
We’re each different
Iv got unresolved issues/hurts but know I dont want to cut ties yes some days it catches me out but let’s say it’s diluting over time
Most important thing is to feel free
Sorry if rambled
TC

Did you continue contact for the inheritance? It doesn’t sound as though she needed you. You have walked away now so work on forgetting about her.

If she was neglectful and abusive did you ever confront her about it? It sounds as if she has a cosy life and the means for herself in her surroundings.
Why can you not walk away and concentrate on your own family? You need not have a guilty conscience what has she given you besides misery. You are not bitter or materialistic you just question what you did to deserve the treatment you got. Live your own life and let her live hers as she so wishes in her selfish world.

sounds like it.
if she is well cared for, no money worries, health ok, what is the burden of your involvement.
can't you just send her a card occasionally if you want to keep in touch.
you don't have to actually do anything for her, do you.
you sound annoyed that she is using her money as she wishes.
if you are in financial need, have you thought of requesting a loan/gift from her, after explaining why you are in difficulties.
otherwise, just leave her to live her life, and you yours.