Friendship,advice and support if estrangement has affected your life.

Funerals can be murderous with estranged relatives in the picture
You never said a truer word DiamondLily

My siblings all have been married twice. When one brother died all current spouses and ex's came! Including his.
Along with the ex's of his adult children!
Some ignored each other, until they had a drink or two.

Was I stressed?
Trying to keep all the drama away from my parents who I thought had quite enough to cope with.

How can one cope with the grief of the situation, when others feel entitled enough to allow their jaws to be loosened by the free alcohol and start airing grievances towards each other, which should have been buried (excuse the pun) long ago?

They should have just had the grace to think of those who were truly grieving.

His widow left early because she felt she might not be able to stand listening to the gripes and grudges.
Believe it or not, the ex's stayed eating drinking and enjoying themselves until the venue closed!!

It was like something out of a Neil Simon farce I can almost laugh at it now.

OK will do.

Are you away again Smileless? Life of Riley! I'm off this weekend to stay with friends in the Lakes; I might just swing by on my way back so please makes sure Mr S has the boiler sorted won't you?

Arrived safe and sound, all unpacked, the dogs fed and walked and even found time for a Bacardi & coke. Only ever drink that when I'm here, it's my holiday drink.

Poor Mr. S.. We weren't getting any hot water. He was swearing at and fiddling with the boiler, I got the manual out (as we women do) but still no joy, so I went to a neighbour for help.

He said it could be a drop in water pressure as he walked across. Came in, looked at the boiler then asked Mr. S. if he'd turned on the gas.

No.

Smileless2012

Packing is well under way but I do wish the dogs would stop getting under my feet, following me everywhere and generally making a nuisance of themselves.

I mean it's not as if we're going to go without them is it!!!

They are getting excited about going on their Holli-bobs..lol ?

Dotcom

Hugs, your comment resonated with me as my daughter has cut off all the family and her brother was devastated as they were close.
Really hard as her cousins funeral is coming up and family know how it’s broken our hearts and feel upset and angry with her.
She would never done this if it wasn’t for the drip drip drip of poison coming from the very person we welcomed into our lives.
Thanks for listening/reading.

Dot?

Funerals can be murderous with estranged relatives in the picture.

My husbands brother died, during one of his son's "sulking estrangement" sessions with us. He decided to attend the funeral, despite the fact he hadn't seen his uncle for years.

DH was upset about his brother, they were very close. Now, he was stressed about his son going.?

I was completely wound up about something kicking off at the funeral, which would have been awful.

In the end, we did the service without acknowledging his son, went to the "wake" for a couple of drinks, with other relatives, , staying clear of his son, and then went back to the hotel where we were staying.

It just wasn't worth the risk of alcohol starting a ruck.?

I do wonder, though, if stepsons own children, now young adults we don't know, think, from their father's behaviour, that parents are disposable commodities. He hasn't got the usual reason of any sort of bad childhood

We won't know, but I do wonder if Karma will happen.

Packing is well under way but I do wish the dogs would stop getting under my feet, following me everywhere and generally making a nuisance of themselves.

I mean it's not as if we're going to go without them is it!!!

Off out shopping for the afternoon followed by a lovely family meal.

Trying to have lots of family experiences for the holidays and days out, too used to pandemic life so making lots of plans.

Have a lovely day all

Thank you Stiller I truly believe estrangement is such a damaging thing to so many and so important to unravel for the sake of future generations.

I'm glad the discussions I have started have helped you feel more comfortable in your decision.

It really does mean a lot

Good news, bowls is back on.

That's good to know Dotcom and I think speaks for us all and to the longevity and success of the support threads.

Hey VS! Just know that your efforts are appreciated and others see!

The internet and its billions of websites belong to no individual or group. No such thing as a “safe space” in the cyber world! We can all chat wherever we’d like. No clique or individual owns or gets to dictate which threads on which forums on which sites others can engage in discussion, even if some have the false impression. I fully intend on popping in and out in my down time waiting for deliverables because it’s very interesting for me for a lot of reasons.

The threads you’ve started have made me discuss a topic that I really haven’t for years and frankly I’ve got a lot of insight that I hadn’t even realized I wanted. I never wavered in my decision but somehow it’s been reaffirmed even more, if that makes sense. Fortified actually. So I appreciate your efforts! . Bit of a ramble really but heartfelt nonetheless. Take care!

Dotcom

VioletSky, I would not be able to be confident in posting here I didn’t feel comfortable.

I understand, a lot of threads here get quite uncomfortable but this one doesn't have to

VioletSky, I would not be able to be confident in posting here I didn’t feel comfortable.

I don't think our ES moving house is ever going to be an option Dotcom. We and my brother provided the deposit of 25K and the agreement is that if they sell, the original amount invested or the % share value, which ever is the greater, will have to be repaid.

It's doubtful as to whether they would ever have enough to put down as a deposit on another property once our investment is reimbursed.

We moved in the end just over 5.5 years ago because seeing him and our GC was just too painful. Best thing we ever did.

It seems this thread is the only one that is kept and cared about by all as a safe space.

I can see the hard work to keep it that way.

I will join here and recommend it to everyone joining estrangement as we all need a safe space to talk about things.

Starting discussion topics has been highly disappointing for me due to people who just want to argue on them amd I'm tired of trying so hard to keep them friendly

They’ve totally cut themselves off and moved house making sure they don’t want contact.

Oh poor Mr. S. As most of you know he loves bowling and is rather good at it so was thrilled they were showing it on BBC1 from the Common Wealth Games but for the last 10 minutes, all they're showing is a shot of the greens with no one playing.

Even the interviews have been sound only!!! Come on BBC, if you could see the disappointment on Mr. S.'s face you'd know you have to up your game.

"if it wasn't for the drip drip drip of poison coming from the very person we welcomed into our lives" Oh Dotcom we know how that feels.

Do you think she'll go the funeral? I was so worried that our ES would turn up at his paternal GM's funeral last year. I had such a bad night the night before worrying about it and was so relieved for everyone especially his dad, that he didn't.

Indeed,Smiles?

Hugs, your comment resonated with me as my daughter has cut off all the family and her brother was devastated as they were close.
Really hard as her cousins funeral is coming up and family know how it’s broken our hearts and feel upset and angry with her.
She would never done this if it wasn’t for the drip drip drip of poison coming from the very person we welcomed into our lives.
Thanks for listening/reading.

Dot?

Maybe Dotcom and if all else fails we could chuck a whole one at them in the hope it knocks some sense into them.

Yogin credit due to your reaching out and expertise at encouraging a new gardener?

Love your humour, Whiff, maybe watermelon is our answer!

Well I'm pretty good at decluttering when it comes to clothes DL but shoes, not so good, and as far as everything else goes, pretty rubbish really.

I agree Whiff who'd have thought that a simple water melon would contain so many healing properties. Well done Yogin.

Talk about truth leaks

I've lost all respect for anyone who thinks engaging in arguments and ruining threads is acceptable a d an enjoyable pass time.

It ruins them for everyone.

Really shameful behaviour.