Support and friendship for those whose lives have been affected by estrangement.

Morning all,
No snow here and a crisp cold sunny day.
My daughter in Brighton reports lots of snow, my GS was thrilled, daughter not do much so. Getting home from work was tricky.
Hope all are faring well in this weather. Turn the heating on and face the bills later, the coldest temps have yet to come 😩
Two lovely foxes were sunbathing on top of my DHs workshop. Managed to take a pic of one of them 👍🌺

Whiff 💐 x

Lovely to hear from you, pleased you are in good spirits and moving forward to fix the problem, soon be back home, rest well and be taken care of for a change.xx

Lovely to see your post Whiff; take care. Love and (((hugs))) xxx

Glad to hear you are in good spirits Whiff and that they are taking good care of you.
Good job you went to the hospital when you did.
Keep us update when you can.
lots of love xxx

Another quick one . Had echocardiogram saw consultant this afternoon had lower chamber heart attack on Monday. On lot of heart medication. Moving to another hospital probably Friday for angiogram and stent or stents fitted. In good spirits just tired.

All I had was headache and pain in left side of my neck . Also had UTI.
They call them silent heart attacks woman more prone to them then men ..💖

Morning all

I too have cards and little notes from my estD Smiles, have a little note I keep in my bible which says 'Happy Mother's Day', enjoy your breakfast'.

Like you *Allsorts; when I watch programmes like 24/7 Emergency and all the doctors and nurses running round helping people and showing real concern for them, I'm in disbelief, wondering how/why they care, when our once beloved child doesn't give a fig!

So pleased to hear from you Whiff so sorry you are going through a bad patch, wish you a speedy recovery and discharge home. Thank God you have a wonderful, caring DD.

Love to all that's posted xxx

Morning all.
Here’s hoping you get your heart checked out today Whiff. 🤞
Thanks Allsorts, I think you are right, some ACs are just selfish and cruel, would also add cowardly, and the fact that we still love them and think of them and would never wish them ill is a reflection upon who we are as parents, whereas what they say or have said and the way they have cut us off without a backwards glance speaks volumes about them.
Hope all estrangees have a good day, is cold here but bearable, so off for a long walk with DH, am angling for coffee and cake again 😜
Take care 🌺🙏🏾

Whiff, Get well soon, thinking of you and know you have a good team of people helping you.💐 Your daughter doesn't think of you putting on her, just wants to be there for you.
Smileless, I don't use the term disgust lightly.
I do consider what my daughter put me through is just that, If someone falls in the street, people rush to help, this is a normal human reaction.
To kick that person and run off, that's appalling.

Babs, what happened to your dear friend was dreadful, you were there for her and the shame is her daughter. What your daughter has said and done to you and your husband the same. I dwell sometimes on what I have been through, those repercussions never go away. You have daughters that think the world of you, grandchildren the same, they are lovely people who you're close to and wouldn't dream of behaving as your other daughter has. You bought them up with love the same but I think that some people are just plain selfish and cruel.💓

Yay!!
So glad to hear from you Whiff 🌺🙏🏾
Rest up and don’t think for a minute you are putting on anyone.
We all miss you.
👋🏽❤️

Dear Whiff, it's such a relief to see your post and to know you're being well looked after xx

Pleased you are being well looked after Whiff, take care, sending hugs.

Thank you for your good wishes I know they are heartfelt ❤️. Had huge HPX episode so much have not idea what happened nor my journey to get too the acute cardiac ward. But I am being well looked after . My daughter was with me and told me what happened. Lost my speak for hour or so . Good job my daughter knows everything. But felt awful putting on her ..But she tells me to stop being a silly billy. Tests on my heart tomorrow already started on new heart tablets .

Take care all and thank you again my dear friends ❤️

Am afraid I have been dwelling on the thought that our EACs care so little, am put in mind of my dear friend who passed away last year, her estranged daughter didn't even send a message when she knew her mum was in a hospice dying of cancer and of course didn't go to the funeral, though she was aware what was going on. And my own estranged daughter has told people we are dead, so I assume we have been dead to her for a while, in which case why would she care if we became really ill. When I had a breakdown she didn't even stop badmouthing us online. My DH and other daughters kept this from me but I found out afterwards.
It doesn't just make me angry it makes me want to contact her to tell her exactly how I am feeling, but of course I won't, and this will pass, but like your son, Smiles, I remember how our estranged daughter would send lovely little notes to us whenever we felt ill or a bit low, what happened to that daughter? Where did she go?
In any case it is what it is.
And at least the sun was shining today so we got out for a walk and coffee with cake.
Take care all, especially Whiff, sending my love and get well vibes xxxxx

Afternoon everyone.

Hope you're able to get on line and read all the 'get well' messages for you Whiff and that you're OK; sending love, (((hugs))) and xx

It's good to hear from you Mandy and to know that you're getting some comfort from this thread. Christmas for you must be a double whammy with it being your ES's birthday too.

Dreams are often a reflection and a release of what's going on in our sub conscious, suggesting that you are searching for the son you had and the person he was before you were estranged. So many EP's say that their EAC are not sons and daughters they were before they estranged us, to do what they have done.

We do I think feel lost without them, and where reconciliation just doesn't seem a possibility and/or realistic goal but continues to be what's yearned for, there comes a time when for many there's the reluctant acceptance that this is never going to happen or as you felt, never getting to where you want to be.

I think hurt becoming disgust is something a lot of EP's experience Allsorts. At the beginning of estrangement, the pain is so overwhelming and all consuming that we're unable to feel anything else. It's only with time that we are able to allow ourselves to find in some circumstances, their behaviour and treatment of us something which disgusts us. It's 'unnatural' perhaps to be disgusted by the actions of your own child.

Mr. S. had prostate problems for years before eventually having surgery just before the first Covid lock down Babs. When he first realised there was a problem, before our EAC was married, he wrote him such a lovely card with so much love and affection that he has it to this day.

Yet throughout the following years when he really struggled, not a word; that's how much he'd changed. It makes me angry to think about it, and angry to remember and think about the awful things he's said and done.

Sounds like the sleepover with your GC went well Yogin .

Thank you for your posts crazyh and Pantglas .

Nice to see your post Hilltop, it's good to know that you're still following and being helped .

We've been out for most of the day as our dogs were groomed so we took the opportunity to catch up with a couple of friends we'd not seen since well before Christmas.

It's bitter cold here and even colder where we used to live even though it's only about 40 miles away, but that's what happens when you're on the coast.

Thanx Hilltop and love0c, we are all hoping Whiff is making a good recovery, sending lots of get well messages🥹🙏🏾

Whiff sending you the best of wishes! keep us informed please of your health.

I'm still following this very helpful, nice thread. I have been since l was estranged nearly six years ago. I hope you are recovering well Whiff. Best wishes and a Happy New Year to all

Yes thanx Pantglas and Crazy.
🌺

Well, much nicer day today, sun shining, must get out now to take Joey for a nice walk in the park, he hasn't had a walk for 2 days! normally every day, but the weather was too bad! Big shop before lunch then lots of jobs to do, as always. Have a nice day all xx

Thank you Pantglass & Crazy and Happy New Year to you both too.

Really sorry Whiff to hear you are in hospital, as you say; best place for you to get sorted out, do hope you are feeling better this morning and hopefully getting back home asap.

Hoping you are recovering Whiff and getting the treatment you need. All thinking of you xx

Just seen your message Whiff and hoping you are in a bed and getting treatment.so you will soon be home. Xx💐

Just popping in to wish everyone a happy new year and a swift recovery to Whiff x