Support and friendship for those whose lives have been affected by estrangement.

Happy and healthy new year to everyone on here, new or old. 👍🍾

Let’s all hope for a good year. 😉👍🥂xxx

Best Wishes for a peaceful and happy 2026 to all on this estrangement thread. It helps me to get on with my life, knowing I'm not alone with this sad and unexpected experience.

"HAPPY NEW YEAR" to all on here. May 2026 be a good one for all xxx

Wishing everyone on here a 'Happier New Year!'

Happy New Year dear friends.

I hope that for each and everyone of us, this year will be one of peace and happiness.

Love and (((hugs))) to you all xx

Happy new year gang . Hope 2026 you can achieve everything you want and come to terms with estrangement and not let it rule your life .

Our children, grandchildren,other family members make their own choice you estrange us. I have never blamed myself for my son estranging me . He made his choice I never saw it coming. But decided November 2023 to let go of ever seeing it hearing from him ever again and been happier since I made that decision. If he thought he could break me then he is wrong . I broke long time ago when my husband died . Real grieve for the other half of yourself dieing gets worse with every year that passes . The worse grief if your child has died.

Estrangement is called a living grief but for me that gets easier especially since my decision to let go. I still love my son but he is a stranger I don't know or like now. But I am not the same mom he knew I have no tolerance for bad behaviour. I will never forgive or forget what he and my daughter in law have done . I have 3 grandson's don't know if they have been told I am dead or don't care. But they are getting older and if they want to find me they will and learn the truth .

If 2025 was an awful time for you not just estrangement but healthwise yours or loved ones .
That's the past 2026 is a new year with new possibilities and new choices . Make choices that want to you achieve and look forward not back .

Know I am pages behind but been busy elsewhere but my rambles will be back 🤣

Happy new year and new start to possibilities. 💞🥂

Estrangement from any one in family is hard but it doesnt compare to your own child doing it and losing your grandchildren in the process, but it still hurts. Estangement forum is for everyone and it is nice to hear things are good for you now DL, particularly having that little girl in your lives, it must bring such joy.
Want to wish everyone a happy and peaceful new year.

Smileless2012

What better way of seeing out 2025 than to see such a positive and uplifting post from you DL .

It really is lovely to see how life has turned around for you, especially as you've been such a supportive and caring member of this thread xx.

His father was invited Yogin, providing he sat at the back of the church!!! I doubt it, but would love to think that he'll be forever haunted by what he's done to his family especially his parents, every time he looks at the medals he won.

A 'born again Christian' yeah right.

I'm feeling really positive right now and strange as it may sound, I think it's because of my brother wanting to make contact and my refusal to do so.

It isn't that my head is ruling my heart, my head's protecting it.

Hi, Smileless - I don’t post much because I’m not in the same position as so many on here x. I do miss posting, but I do read it xx. You were all such a great help to me through the traumas of my life. 😊. But, I feel a bit of a fraud on here. 🤷‍♀️

Well, I fell out and estranged my brother, the night before DHs funeral. I can’t get past what he said.

I’m happy not giving him, DHs family or GGDs birth mother any headspace.👍🍾

I’m not horrible generally, I’m very laid back, but some things I just can’t get past, and nor do I want to. I’m done with them.

We need to protect our own well being - nothing wrong with that. We only get one life. 😊

I read the sister site to this a lot, although rarely post. I am constantly astonished by the trivia, with Gen X, that they seem to want to estrange from (mainly) their DHs families, but sometimes their own parents.

Wrong bread sauce at Xmas? Best go non contact. Disrespectful, 😂😂😂

Jeez, I hope they never have a real trauma. 🙄

Anyway, happy new year to all - hope it’s happy and healthy 🍾🍾🍾🌺🌺xxxx

Debbie So pleased to read you had a good Xmas day with your DD&GD, enjoyed some games after your lovely Xmas dinner.

I know you met up for your traditional Xmas walk with your siblings before Xmas day, but to miss out on the one after, which hurt & upset you, in my opinion was wrong. You should have been there the second time too and not your estranging D. Her choice to do the dirty deed, so; therefore, her that should have missed out on the nice Xmas met up.

I, like you Debbie, don't know my DGC anymore, they were toddlers when I last saw them and now they are grown teenagers. I did have a very special bond with my little GD, which is exactly why I was cut out.

It’s good to hear that many of you have had a nice Christmas and are feeling so positive about your lives following estrangement. It has given me strength and helped with acceptance of my situation.
I managed to ‘survive’ Christmas Day by making a big effort with the food, spoiling the family that came over and having a lot of fun playing silly games. My 6 year old GD (the only one I see now) was a delight and I so wanted it to be a happy time for her, which also made lovely memories for me. I did cry before bed though, once they had all gone home, and I was once again left with the sadness of my estrangement from my eldest D and two GDs.
My estranged family met up on the annual family walk with my siblings and nieces/nephews on 27th and I felt very cheated that we couldn’t go this year. I spent the whole day sorting and tidying - I always find cleaning the shower cubicle good therapy for some reason !!! At least my brother messaged me after asking if I was OK as he realised how hard this must have been for me.
Hearing about the Ramsey/Peaty family story, and also the Beckhams, it does seem to be that this is happening more than I ever realised before estrangement struck me! Or maybe it has been going on fr years and I am only noticing it now. Could this be a sign of how that generation deals with issues - to decide to have ‘no contact’ with their own mothers and family rather than deal with their isssues? I also wonder if they have any empathy for us estranged, broken hearted, bereaved mothers and grandmothers? I suspect not.
After two years of this pain, I can’t take much more and my New Year’s resolution is to become as strong and brave as you ladies who have struggled with it for years. At the moment, I actually feel a strong dislike for my own daughter, which I never thought could happen. I dont think I want her back in my life anyway now knowing that she is capable of treating me like this. My pain now is for the loss of my two GDs.
I hear from my youngest daughter about what is going on in their lives., and they seem to have grown up so much, and their lives have moved on in the two years, that I dont think I know them any more. Any hope I still hold is that one day they will come back in my life.
So keep positive everyone and thankyou all for your support. I wish you a Happy and peaceful New Year.

What better way of seeing out 2025 than to see such a positive and uplifting post from you DL .

It really is lovely to see how life has turned around for you, especially as you've been such a supportive and caring member of this thread xx.

His father was invited Yogin, providing he sat at the back of the church!!! I doubt it, but would love to think that he'll be forever haunted by what he's done to his family especially his parents, every time he looks at the medals he won.

A 'born again Christian' yeah right.

I'm feeling really positive right now and strange as it may sound, I think it's because of my brother wanting to make contact and my refusal to do so.

It isn't that my head is ruling my heart, my head's protecting it.

I read that Gordon Ramsey's DD got married last Saturday. The groom fell out with his mum, and neither her, his dad and 2 brothers were invited to the wedding. The mum said she feels like her heart has been ripped out! We all know that horrible feeling. The mum wasn't invited to the 'hen do' as bride to be said she wouldn't fit in, and it all snowballed from there.

Lovely to hear from you Diamond How time flys! Good luck with your new man friend and good to hear your little GGD is doing well, does her dad see her. Happy New Year

How lovely to hear from you DL, and hear your life is now so full and postive hope it goes from strength to strength, wishing you a great new year.🤗

Spring20 - thank you for your good wishes. 🌺

Congrats on your new GC, but, no, nothing can ever replace what you’ve lost. Whether it’s through death or estrangement, it’s an ongoing struggle to just try and see the positives in life. Not easy. But it’s all we can do. 🤷‍♀️

Hopefully, some of the estrangements on here will sort themselves out in time, as some have in the past - life really is too short for any angst that can be discussed and healed.

But, some won’t and can’t be.

Like you, I wish everyone on here a happy and healthy 2026 xx

DL so lovely to hear from you and catch up on all your news. Am thrilled things have settled down in your life, and the outcome for your GGC is working well.
Enjoying our new GC but with all the loveliness of this, it brings into sharp focus the sadness of the gc we don’t see. Realise we still have to work at staying in a good place….not sure that will ever end. But otherwise all is well. Hoping 2026 brings happiness for us all here on this forum.

Hiya everyone xxx. Just wanted to come on to wish you all a happy new year x 🍾

I can guess how hard this time of year is for some of you. 🌺

I do read GN, but I feel a bit of a fraud coming onto the estrangement forum - yes, I’m estranged from my brother, my late DHs relatives and my GGDs birth mum - but all at my instigation, so not the same at all.

But, you all helped me so much through my trauma I thought I’d say hello and thank you .😊

It’s been nearly 3 years since DH died. It was pretty awful. 🙁

My health collapsed, half my hair fell out, and I’ve lost 7 stone in weight - who needs fat jabs?😳. Not recommended to try this diet though. 😳

I had put on a lot of weight through DH, after medical orders, insisting he’d only eat full fat/sugar/cream foods if I did . I piled the weight on, he gained nothing. 🙄

Now, I weigh less than I did at 18. Pity older skin doesn’t cooperate as well as young skin. 🙄

But, on we go. I just spend more money keep having to buy clothes. 😳. My bank are pleading for respite 😂

I’ve had terrific support from family, friends, real and online, and neighbours. I’m lucky. 👍

DH, before he died, told me to find my joy, my light and my laughter again - he knew what kept me well. 💖

So, I’ve pressed on. 😉

I decided to find something positive to achieve every day. About a year after DH died, I was reading a predominantly female “anti-men” forum. (The sister one to this) and a man posted to say he’d lost his wife of 40+ years, who he’d cared for for a long time, and he didn’t want counselling or medication but felt lost. The same as me. I wanted neither either. Pointless in my view. 🤷‍♀️

But, on this site, posters jumped all over it - being a man and not wanting counselling are cardinal sins. 🙄

So, I sent a PM offering condolences - well, long story short, we were mail support friends for a long time, but now life has moved it all on a bit. He came up here for a meeting over a year ago,.

Neither of us want 24/7 any more, and we live 90 miles apart, but we meet at least once a month and go away on short breaks together. 👍

The family have met him, and really like him - he’s a lovely bloke. 👍

Next June, we’re off to a break, carting along 6 of my English family members/friends and my 8 American friends and family. Can’t think what could possibly go wrong here. 😂😂. Isle of Wight - brace yourselves. 😳

My GGD is nearly 3 now and she is a delight. Despite medical predictions about how her birth mother’s behaviour with drugs/alcohol could affect her, it hasn’t. She’s great - reaching all milestones, talking non stop, going to nursery, and thriving, and assertive and stroppy when she needs to be. (Can’t think who she takes after 😬😬😬🤐😉) . I am so relieved. 💖

She spent Xmas with us and had a great time. It’s difficult with her full time carer/guardian being a JW but we’re all getting there. Helped by the court order. Birth mother, who wasn’t allowed to see her except under professional supervision, seems to be out of her life now - she has another man and has moved to the other end of the country. No longer interested in her daughter. It makes life easier.🤷‍♀️DD, SIL, and the rest of us make sure she only knows love and fun. 👍

Anyway, I’m waffling, so I’ll end with wishing you all a happy and healthy 2026 xx🌺

🍾

So nice to read you had a good Xmas day Smiles
Hope everyone else did too.

Quiet day yesterday, watching some good films, eating and drinking lovely Xmas fair.

Another quiet one today, walkies with Joey, pop to local Tesco for a couple of bits. Work tomorrow, just one class which I will enjoy, then off again till next Sunday, back to normal schedule after that.

Enjoy the rest of your day all xx

Yoga what a great photo. At my sons tge cars were centre stage with theur antics, i think if i am temoed to have anitger cat I would get two as they are such good playmates, apart from the odd hiss if a favourite toy us threatened,
Smileless, you are much stronger now and followed your instincts, well done. You should be called Smiler now.
Whiff, Caroline is so talented, you lose yourself in your craft son no wonder you both get on creating beautiful work.
CrazyH, walking in eggshell is exhausting, I cannot do it any more, however now I don't have the need,

Hope everyone had an enjoyable Christmas. Enjoy the rest of the holidays.
Atm everything is fairly ok with the AC. but believe me, the eggshells are always there….
Thanks to Smileless and everyone else, who have over the years, given me advice on one thing or another.
Hope 2026 will be a better year for everyone.

Thanks for the article Spring.

Isn't Joey simply adorable Yogin. Mr. S. got some video of our two playing with their pressies in amongst the discarded wrapping paper.

We had a lovely day in fact, this has been the best run up too Christmas, and Christmas day we've had since our estrangement .

Strange as I thought that message from my cousin would derail me, but it seems to have had the opposite affect. Being confronted with someone who estranged me wanting to resume contact, and allowing my head to rule my heart has strengthened me in my resolve to put us first.

It's the life we've built for ourselves that matters now, and we mustn't allow anyone or anything to undermine it.

Hope you all enjoyed your Xmas day as much as my Joey did .

Morning all

Hope you all had a Brillant Xmas day.

Lovely 'door wreath' Whiff. I reckon your post dropped down onto your tool bar, if you look for a hi-lighted box, click on and it's your post hopefully!

I bought a lovely door wreath when I went to the Germany Xmas market with my DD before her C were born, all natural with acorns cinnamon sticks etc. carried all the way home, along with a giant beer keg for my son with inscription for him on it. Every year put my door wreath from Germany on the door but repairing a little each time, this year thought I needed to buy new, but the only ones I liked were the same as I had costing more than £25, so did another repair job and still looks good today .

Smiles love and }}}hugs{{{ to you too.

Spring So true; the article in The Times, and as you say; good to read.

Totally agree Smileless.
Here is photo of the article - it has balance in it but is worth reading.

Morning everyone, hope you all had a good day yesterday.

That is good Spring. Encouraging estrangement as a 'go too' solution regardless of the situation is reckless and often with little or no thought for the consequences of those estranging, as well as those being estranged.