Support and friendship for those whose lives have been affected by estrangement.

Oh yes they're here Yogin .

Smiles yes, I do remember that advert, very clever doggie, Joey is very clever but unfortunately cannot say sausage, he just gives a big smile and the sausage is his .

Good to hear you arrived safely at your B&B and good timing to knock out your rut and put a on your face. Are your doggies with you? bet they are.

Afternoon everyone.

Do you remember the do on 'That's Life' who could say 'sausages' Yogin? You'll have to teach little Joey; imagine how thrilled the owner would be if the next time you take Joey and he brings him a sausage, if he could say it!!! .

So sorry about the loss of your park friend Yogin . A plaque on the bench where your friend used to sit sounds like a lovely idea. You often see that and sometimes flowers are tied on one of the arms when its the anniversary.

I've passed all of your congratulations into Mr. S., who is very pleased with the shield but disappointed that his photo wasn't in the local paper but all's well as it will be going in this week. As we're away having arrived at the lovely Air B&B we keep coming back to this afternoon, I've suggested he text his sister and ask her to get him a copy.

It's a shame we don't live nearer to one another as it would be great to meet face to face and be able to do away with those 'virtual hugs' for day and hug for real.

So pleased the appointment went well Whiff, it's great that you're receiving such great care. It is odd isn't it that you're so often asked if you go to church. Like Allsorts, that's never happened to me but once when I was at a church home meeting I was asked if I was a 'born again Christian'. I hate that expression so said no, I've been one ever since I can remember.

It's great to be here and we'll be getting some lovely weather too. I struggled yesterday getting everything together because TBH I've been in an emotional rut lately which I don't seem to be able to climb out of and when I am, I don't want to go anywhere, see anyone or do anything. Good job we booked this when we were here last year .

Hope Mr. B. is doing well Babs and you're managing OK. Sometimes even though I've read through a post before posting, a load of nonsense still appears .

Waiting for the Air B&B owner to pop round because we can't work out how to use the TV (blush).

Good idea Whiff re the rose bush. We are going to put a plaque on the bench where he sat, he bought the bench when his friend died, so I would think that will be fine by all. We will no doubt have a memorial for him at some point.

Had my GDs over for Sunday dinner yesterday, so my DD&S.i.l could go out for a meal. Slept till almost 8am this morning, when normally I'm up by 6am, sometimes 5.30am, so the girls must have worn me out more than I thought all good fun though.

Allsorts it must be my face or something but people ask me on a regular basis which church I attend. I do things to help people because I want to and if they need help or I have some advice which will help them I do .

On Friday waiting to see my neurologist got talking to a young mom and her daughter. And told her about the Brain Charity to make sure she gets all the benefits she is entitled to..as she has 2 conditions which means she can't work. She has a husband but didn't think she was entitled to PIP . Told her about the National disability card and all the money off shops give it's £20 for 2 years but supermarkets etc off a % discount off. Plus there is the National carers card . Also the Access card which has symbols on mine has the one for I can't stand still long In a queue,companion and WC . Which means if I need the loo and the shop doesn't have public loo they will let me use the staff one when I show my card. That was cheaper and lasts 3 years.

Took me 35 years of fighting to get disability benefits so I always tell people about things they can get and where to get help..

I don't understand people think you have to believe in a god to be a good person and do things to help people. Just because I am an atheist doesn't mean I am a bad person. Even though where I used to live I was told I will burn in the fires of hell. Pointed out as I don't believe in god therefore don't belief in the devil but I will burn in the crem. But I do believe in in evil and wickedness. But that's what people do to eachother religion has nothing to do with it .

I feel as you do Yogin about Pure Cremation, no closure. However people have a right to choose what they want. Every time you pass the place you talked to your friend you will think of him. Perhaps you can all toast his life next time you all meet
up.
Whiff, I have never had anyone ask about whether I believe or not and its wrong that people have questioned you.

Allsorts my friend lives in the next town .

I wanted just a cremation no fuss. I have organised 3 funerals parents where religious just with one arrangement of flowers from the family and donations from others which went to charity no wake just cake and sandwiches for me and my children and my brother and his . Only thing dad said was no woman vicar they talk to much . Both small funerals especially mom's as she was 90 only one sibling left . Few more at dads he was 80..

My husband was a non religious funeral as we are atheists lot of people there just donations no flowers as they are a waste of money. But we raised over £5,000 for treats for cancer ward patients if they wanted a bottle of something nice ,fan , chocolate or anything that didn't cost over £30 . That way the money went further . No wake . My daughter's housemates hired a car and came . She didn't want her boyfriend there . I told her to go out to have a meal with them before they drove back . My son went out with his best friend. I just wanted to be alone .

Have been to wakes but hate them if I had a choice I wouldn't have gone . But was asked so couldn't say no.

My daughter wants a funeral so I offered to pay for it but she said no it's her responsibility. But she knows it's non religious no flowers and there won't be many there depends if any of my friends are still alive and relatives. And she said she will scatter our ashes together. I don't care where . We will live on in our children and grandsons DNA. We never believed in the after life . We had our time together when he was alive and my daughter and grandsons had their time with me while alive . To me life is for living once dead that's it no more.

I know many here have strung religious views and that's your choice and if it helps you then that's good and glad it helps you .

I have non my choice . Thankfully no one here things I am wrong . Pity some people I meet tell me I am wrong but I ask them what gives them the right to say that to me . And if that's being a Christian them I am glad I am an atheist. I don't judge people . I treat people how I want to be treated . And to be honest I do more good than those so called Christians .

I got so fed up with cold callers . I had a sign for outside my bungalow which says no cold callers and no religions of any faith . No had a cold caller or as my dad called them god bothers since.

Mom and dad where both Christians but they didn't believe you had to go too church to believe . Dad used to chase Jehovah's witnesses up the drive shouting I am a blood donor .

Yogin I have a mutant gene in my brain receptors which is why I have hereditary Hyperekplexia gene mutation SLC6A5 type 3. Or HPX for short . But something other than my HPX is wrong . Non of my new symptoms have anything to do with my HPX checked with my group if anyone has the things that are happening to me since January. But I know my neurologist will help me .

Pity you can't plant a rose bush where your park friend liked to be in the park that way it will bloom every year . A lasting tribute to him and he's love for the park .

Babs yes that is him sitting by the boating shed. Lots of flowers there now, I'll get some roses to put there tomorrow, park will not be the same without him there, everyone knew him.

He arranged one of these 'direct cremations', when he told me I said Cancel it, you have lots of friends and family that would want to say a final goodbye to you, this was before he was ill. I see the ads for this on TV and got an envelope through the post for it too this week I thinks it's horrible.

Thanks Whiff for all your comments on my posts. Sounds like you had a lovely lunch with your friend from GN and seems you got on really well if you stayed so long. Good to read you were happy with the neurologist and sorted out some further appointments, good luck when they come along. Your posts are always very well put together, so can't be much wrong with your brain.

Babs hope your DH is improving and getting plenty of rest and TLC at home now.

Allsorts It's lucky if you live near enough to meet up. It would be nice to meet up with you & some of the other regular posters on here for a coffee, but I think we all live a distance apart. I was very surprised how near Babs & I live from each other and as you know we have met up a couple of times, had a really good chat & got on well, as I think we all would, having so much in commen.

Good news Whiff about your neurologist, you will hopefully get the answers you need.
Glad your meeting went well with fellow gransnetter, do you live close? Never met up with anyone yet although on here for many years.

So glad you like your neurologist Whiff, and that you are getting an MRI, as you say knowing what you are dealing with makes such a difference, it is the unknown that is scary.
Have a good nights sleep 🙏🏾❤️

Saw my neurologist he's great because he listens to me. He said about having MRI scan on my brain before I could ask also going to find the nearest speech centre for me . But MRI first so now on the list . Very happy with how the appointment went . I trust him completely. I am not worried if they find something wrong in my brain in fact it would be a relief if there was . May sound strange but I spent 63 years not knowing why I was like I am . Knowing if something is wrong I can cope with that . And I know he will help me in anyway he can.

Very tired so think it will be an early night tonight .

Hope your appointment goes well today Whiff.

Whiff am so glad your meeting with a friend made on GN went so well, am pretty sure you didn’t shock her at all if she was still there at 6.35.
Good luck with your appointment today, fingers crossed 🤞🙏🏾❤️

Allsorts I often hit the send button before checking and a load of nonsense appears. The other day was texting about golf to a friend and the word goblin appeared but had sent it already, she thought it was hilarious because the same thing happens with her.
❤️❤️

Yogi I must treat Joey to a sausage I think the dog cafe do one on the seafront when DH is out of the woods again with recent bleed will hopefully see you and Joey there 🙏🏾
Don’t get out much to be honest. The last time I saw an old friend was when I bumped into Yogi at the park. But looking forwards to GS birthday this weekend. They are all coming here but bringing food with them.
Am sorry about your friend on the park yogi am pretty sure I’d know if I saw him, did he sit with all the other owners and their dogs near the boating shed??
❤️❤️

Yogin I read the previous page and replied there. Sorry about your park friend dieing . Your dad was right as we age we go to more funerals than weddings .

Yesterday I had the great pleasure of meeting someone from GN. Can't remember which forum from . But we have been texting for ages and finally we where both free at the same time . Went to a hotel I had never been to before. Had a taxi as no idea where it was . Beautiful place . She arrived at 12 and we had lunch about 1 but didn't leave the hotel until 6.35pm . The time just flew by . We are meeting again in October as we are both going away next month. She's like me a chatterbox. But me being me made her laugh at some of the things I came out with . As she wants to see me again can't have shocked her that much. Lunch was lovely and managed not to drop any down me . Was going to fetch my new specs so went out early this morning to get them and do but if shopping.

Seeing my neurologist this afternoon and see what happens. Take care all.

Yogin your friends husband must have been a very clever man to start his own observatory and have dealings with NASA so he has left a lasting legacy .

Sorry about your park friend. Remember you saying sometime ago you where worried about him as he wasn't very well.

Glad you had a good roofer and you are pleased with his work . It does take time to get good tradesmen but they are worth there weight in gold . I knew before moving here what needed to be done and what order. Me and my lists and foreward planning .

Glad you had a good time at your daughter's birthday lunch . And lucky Joey. Excellent customer service on part of the restaurant.

Allsorts re Joey's sausage xx

I was talking about this with my park friends, one said 'did you check your bill to see if they had charged for the sausage & did you check re service charge?' No to both, didn't check just paid still have receipt so will check after the fact, not worried if I paid for sausage, but gave a decent tip, which I wouldn't have if it was already on the bill. I don't like that, much rather give to the server.

My park friend passed away yesterday , all these deaths, think as you get older it happens more. I remember my dad saying that they go to more funerals than weddings now .

Yoga, if ever I meet up with you I will bring a dish of sausage for Joey. Glad your roofer did a good job and you had a lovely time at the party.
Well done on your win Mr S. Trust shield.is in a prominent position.😊
Whiff, understand now how you had the free ticket. The box sounds perfect for Fishermans Friends, it will be great. I watched the film again on tv the other week.
As I typed this I checked every sentence was correct, about to press send and several words had changed and I had to alter,.don't know why but it's so annoying.

Morning all

Thanks very much for your comments re roofer and my friend's husband passing.

They emigrated to Spain about 5yrs ago, but fly back on a regular basis, so we would met up for lunch or a night out. He started an observatory and even had Nasa on his books, they were doing really well. So sad! Also my park friend was given just 48hrs to live, so his family are by his side now.

Very pleased with my roof, the new guy was excellent, polite and friendly. He arrived at 8am and didn't fiish till 4pm. I had to leave him to it as it was my DD birthday and we were going out for lunch, had a lovely time by the seaside, took Joey as he was not enjoying the workman in our garden. The restaurant was excellent, the first thing they did was ask if Joey would like some water, then asked if he'd like a sausage! brought up a big dish of sauage for him , so I was won over with that. Food was excellent too.

Babs Nice to read your DH is enjoying your GS birthday celebrations. Good luck with everything at the hospital.

Smiles well done to Mr.S with winning the trophy.

Whiff & Allsorts good to read your posts and that you are both well.

Allsorts the system doesn't work like that . The ticket was given to me for a companion because of my disability. It was for me to take another person . Unfortunately the only one who would have enjoyed it couldn't go and no one else likes his music . Sir Stephen Hough is playing the piano with a full orchestra. Not everyone like classical music. I wasn't put on the access system until I went to my first concert last month was conductor Vasily Petrenko. It was brilliant and with my hi fidelity ear plugs with the strongest strength I could hear the music without any noise around me . When talking to people had to take them out as I couldn't hear what they where saying clearly . But wearing them kept my HPX kicking in . So I can go to concerts but won't go to the pictures as I will be to crammed in and the screening rooms are to small for me to cope with.

I brought my ticket for Fishermen's friends as soon as they where announced so had it for 5 months it's for February. I have to pick seats that is accessible for me . So the concert I am seeing in November is in a box as all the other available seats where not suitable but it was only £10 dearer.

Yogin I am sorry about your friend . My mom was lucky her GP was away and it was a locum. Mom had pain in her left breast so was sent to rapid access clinic. Mammogram and biopsy the cancer was in the right breast and the size of a pea the consultant said if she hadn't come when she did she would have died . The smaller the cancer the more aggressive it is . Plus not all lumps can be felt or detected via machines.

When I had my hysterectomy when I was 38 they could clearly see the large cyst in my left ovary. I opted for total hysterectomy good job as my right was covered in tiny ones . I was lucky they where all benign.

My husband's oncologist said cancers like to hide and can kill before anyone has any symptoms. My husband's grade 4 malignant melanoma appeared over night . And we knew he wouldn't live 5 years he lived 3. He had 6 tumours when he was terminal but it took a month for them to be seen and only because they used a stronger dye than normal for them to show .

Your friend and her husband may have known he had cancer and choose not to tell anyone. When we had my husband's diagnosis and he wouldn't live . He didn't want anyone to know so only me and the children knew he was dieing . As in his words he didn't want to be treated as a dead man walking and wanted to live a normal life .He really didn't want to tell people when he was terminal but I told him he must . Those people who treated him differently he cut them cut out of our lives . I had to threaten my parents if they differently he wouldn't see them . His own mother just said oh. And after he died told people she had no son or grandchildren.

While this is a shock to you Yogin they may have been expecting it. No one knows how they will handle with a cancer diagnosis until they get it plus the grade if a 4 or 5 it's unlikely you will live 5 years . Grade 3 50/50 chance . 1 or 2 with treatment then you could live a full life . Plus it depends where the cancer is . Some cancer's kill no matter the grade . Unfortunately it's now 1 in 2 people will get cancer it was 1 in 3 in 2001 . That's why it's so important still to check you bodies and have mammograms ,smears and bowel screening for woman . Prostate and bowel screening for men checking their testicles . But men must check their chests as men can get breast cancer and it kills men quicker .

When my husband died 2,000 people died a month from skin cancer. I think it's more now . Winter sun is as dangerous as summer sun .

Babs just read what you wrote after I wrote my ramble . My brother knows someone who tests the bowel cancer samples . They start when you are 60 and sent every 2 years . They only get 60% of the samples sent returned . So 40% of people are playing with their lives . It's so simple to do . At least it's easier to do now than when I was 60 and it was cardboard and you couldn't send it back until you had done 3 samples . At least it's only one now and in a bottle and tiny amount to fill the grooves on the stick.

Congratulations to Mr S on his bowls shield . Needed to end on a happy note .

Well is rinse and repeat, DH went for an assessment in the hospital, turns out that last weeks CT hadn’t changed from the one before it but still showed signs of a bleed, another CT yesterday showed similar. Have been told to bring him back in if there are signs of deterioration. Difficult to tell when the original stroke makes him confused and agitated sometimes as well as very tired.
Hmmm.
Still the fam are here this weekend for GCs birthday. Am making him a Spider-Man cake. They are bringing all the food and drink. He is having another party at home with his nursery pals. So really looking forward to that.
Hope everyone is enjoying the weather.
Lots of love ❤️

It is just a shock Yogin, losing someone so quickly. Your poor friend.

That's right Babs, with some cancers you can have it for sometime before you notice there maybe something wrong.