Budget and Benefits and impact

Cath9. It was vice versa. I had only one child and I did not get child benefit as it was only for mothers who had more than one child. I never knew the rationale behind it but I suspect it was to encourage parents to have more than one child post war?

I seem to remember getting child benefit in 1975 for my first baby then again in 1981 and 1983 when the next two arrived,

I had my two in the 1970s. Did we get child benefit for a second child?
I ask, although I could be wrong, that in the 1970s we got a benefit for the first child when one has to buy all that is needed for a first baby but no benefit for any further children

Trust that your adult son can manage his duties as a father without interference or influence from his parent.

I am confused as to what any of the details you’ve provided have to do with you personally. Your son is free to go to court if he has any issues. But what kind of parent moans and complains about having to provide anything at all for their child to begin with? Funny how these complaints manifest when couples split. It’s as though some think their responsibilities to their offspring are dependent on the status of the romantic relationship. Hopefully this isn’t the case with your son, but either way you should step back from involvement.

Separation comes with financial as well as emotional costs.

The current approach is for the child to spend 50% of the week with each of their parents. My experience is many fathers avoid paying any maintenance as a result.

I’d advise you to keep out of the arrangements yiu son and his child’s mother make. They seem to be doing well

My son has been separated from his child’s mother for quite a few years. He works shifts in a civilian role for the police and always has his son on his four days off plus part of school holidays. This was stipulated by the court, as was the maintenance. Sometimes he moans about the amount he pays, especially as the child’s mother is in a very well-paid job but overall he accepts this as a necessary part of maintaining a good relationship with his son and he remains on civil terms with the child’s mother.

Shouldn't this subject be under legal and money? No one can comment on a court ruling unless they know all they know all the circumstances.

Now his mother is able to pay more, could his Dad’s financial contribution be renegotiated?

The arrangement via court is shared care - is this 50/50?

Ski66

The recent budget will be in everyone’s minds for varying reasons.
Perhaps the forum has some wise words. Son and partner are estranged with one child. The arrangement via court is shared care. Son had to sell his home ,move close to former partner and go via courts . Eventually costing him the equity in his home. He works hard , pays maintenance for his son plus sports,clubs and summer holiday camps.Former partner has now chosen to work 20 hours per week, receives child benefit plus my sons contribution and now UC. What is going on?

Sounds fine to me ...ex is working and claiming what,she's entitled to

Their arrangements are their own.

Also the budget has nothing to do with this situation if there is only one child. Obviously the child’s mother has gone back to work so she will need childcare taking her situation into account she knows that she needs to get her place back in the workforce.

I really can’t advise on financial issues with regard to this but it appears your son has done the right thing in order to have a good relationship with his child, and would advise that you applaud him for this and not take sides. His partner’s situation may irk you and possibly your son as well, but it is what it is and having the chance to have a relationship with your GC is what really matters.

As far as I know only one parent can claim therefore as the mum probably earns less it makes sense she claims. Maintenance ect does not come into the equation. I suspect the childcare is not 50/50 ie does your son have the child 50% of a week ?