Now we are in trouble for hoarding our money not spending it.

So how much do you have to squirrel away to be kept in a care home? How on earth than people save enough to exist in one. If it's upwards on £1000 a week, your average house sale would only keep you 3 to 5 years, what happens to you when that's gone, what would have happened before you sold the house. It's crazy. Finding a good care home is a lottery anyway.

I for one never mentioned dementia as despite having 3 strokes caused by my auto immune condition I seem to be fine mentally and showing no signs of deterioration. It will be physical issues that will see me needing full time care and I have no intention should that day come of leaving my home. I certainly don't despair and have never said that I do. Unlike many on here I don't suffer from depression and I'm pretty chipper most of the time. It's not a case of assuming the worst but of being realistic and not expecting a miracle cure. So I have my stash of drugs for when the pain becomes unbearable and I feel there is no future. Whether that be next year or ten years or more I can't say. I just have no intention of spending years of my life in agony with no chance of respite. You can think what you like but I have no intention of allowing the government to get their hands on my Property which would be swallowed up in next to no time. Nope that property that I worked so hard for is going to my kids in it's entirety.

Monica, for me personally. Most people I knew who lived till their 80s /90s in their own homes and having their mobility were the exception rather than the rule. I am in my 50s and have loads of health issues. Both my siblings who are in their 60s and 70s have far better health than I. My eldest sibling is 75 and their health and mobility are far better than mine. I also have family members who didn't make it to 40. To me, it's the luck of the draw.

The point I am making is that we simply do not know what the future will bring and just assuming all the time that it is nothing but dementia and despair pulls one down.

I have every sympathy for those whose family history or present health difficulties make it clear that things are already deteriorating, but I have just found in life, and like most people, my life has included a fair share of problems and catastrophes, that being hopeful about the future has better outcomes than always assuming the worst.

Well some of us are not so fortunate as to have all our relatives living to their 90's and are basing our thoughts on our own relatives. My mum died at 48 and my dad at 61 all their children have out lived them. I'm only 65 but due to my ill health I rely completely on my sons for everything. That doesn't mean I'm despondent or despairing I'm pretty optimistic given the circumstances. I've already been struck down in my prime I went from extremely fit and healthy to barely being able to stand or move in the space of 5 years. I don't want sympathy for my plight and nor do I assume everyone else is going to suffer the same as me. I've never thought that and never will . We all see our future from our own unique point of view , don't disrespect others just because it differs from your own.

Why s everyone assuming getting very old mean years of misery and care.

I don't think we are, but the possibility is always there, M0nica and we never know.

I've had friends who have suddenly and unexpectedly died in their 50s or 60s, perfectly healthy and active friends and relatives who have suddenly been struck down with dementia in their 50s or perhaps in their late 80s.
We all know people who are fit and healthy in their 80s and 90s and we have a relative still living at home without having to have care at 100+.

We just never know.

Why s everyone assuming getting very old mean years of misery and care. I have had family in care but the majority of my long-lived family have been able to live at home, look after themselves and enjoy life as normal. My father died at 92 after a short illness. Until shortly before his illness he thought nothing of driving the 90 miles to see me or my sister and still on the committee of 2 local committees and was master of ceremonies, assisting the priest at all church ceremonies.

Another aunt, now 92 is still living at home, driving to the shops, looking after herself and serves a beautiful tea if we call in. She has a daughter nearby, who takes her on longer trips, We had a family gathering at our house last summer and she came with her daughter. because it was a round trip of 200 miles.

I am aware I could be struck down in my prime but I reckon the best way of helping myself to have a long happy and healthy old age is to stay optimistic and not assume that extreme old age means misery in a failing mind and body.

This all reminds me of the joke about the bank robber, who, on being caught, was asked, 'Why do you rob banks?' He answered, 'Because that's where all the money is.'

Having splurged their own money government and business look around for where any more spare cash is. Much of it is in the hands of awkward oldsters who are living in valuable homes and have saved a bit for a rainy day. The oldsters have the cheek not to pop their clogs quickly enough and so these messages from the Resolution Foundation and elsewhere filter through to the public perception.

Whether it is in taxation, equity loans with ruinous conditions or exhortions to spend, spend, spend, the Big Bad Man wants our dosh.

But he's not getting mine. I earned it and paid tax on it and if I want to turn it into a pile of notes and set fire to it that's my business and mine alone.

Obviously, that's not what I will be doing with my money. If there's anything left I will pay for assistance to stay in my own home when I am frail and give or leave the rest to my dear children.

Oh how I agree with you soda pop cant win Us oldies brought about Brexit We take up all the hospital beds Its our fault we were able to retire at 60 the list goes on I guess they need someone to blame whoever they maybe

Callistemom, Im with you. All very well all the medical advances aiding us to live longer, but if your QUALITY of life is nonexistent, what is the point?

Newquay I'm on very strong pain killers and if I took an overdose I'd simply fall asleep and never wake up. I was deliberately vague as I don't want to give anyone ideas.

I woke up this morning and had a think about this.

I may not be a popular view but, with all the advances in medical science, wonderful new drugs etc, are we living longer with conditions which may well have finished us off years ago. We may be living longer but what is the quality of life if we cannot care for ourselves and are so dependent on others? Like Hetty's neighbour, not even to get to the toilet because the carer left the Zimmer frame out of reach?

Hetty58 has your neighbour thought of one of those alarms? My neighbour had one and we were on the list to go to her aid if we were called? Your neighbour with a key could have been able to help him with something so simple before he got so desperate.

www.theguardian.com/society/2019/jun/06/uk-running-out-of-care-home-places-says-geriatrics-society-chief

And you may not find a carer either:

www.itv.com/news/2018-11-26/britain-faces-shortage-of-350-000-social-care-workers-by-2028-report-warns/

Apricity, you may well get your wish as many homes are closing, having failed to make any profit. It seems that there simply won't be enough of them to meet demand in a decade or two.

As per several comments, sadly, when a person has dementia and is significantly cognitively impaired and carers are exhausted there are few alternatives apart from residential care. There were so many inspiring and humane developments in specialised dementia care in the 1990s that all seem to have been lost, discarded and ignored in the endless and greedy pursuit of corporate profit and fat salary packages for executives while paying pittances to the overstretched care staff.

In light of an earlier comment it is interesting to note that the Australian arm of BUPA was frequently cited for poor care and understaffing in the recent Royal Commission.

My personal aim is to remain at home for the duration and that is why I have considered and planned to optimise the chances of that happening. That is the best we can do with the resources that we each have. ?????

Hoarding what money exactly? With no pension till Im 67 I doubt I will have anything too hoard.

I went out with the dog one day and heard Frank (next door but one) screaming and shouting. Luckily, a neighbour has a key.

His 'carer' had arrived as usual (at 9.30, when her kids were in school) to help him get up and dressed. She'd forgotten to put his walking frame next to his chair when she left.

It was 3 pm and he'd not been able to eat or use the toilet. He'd only had a cup of tea. He was in a terrible panic as another carer was dueto come at 5.30 pm to put him back in bed for the night!

And how about the people and companies who take their profits and money offshore to avoid tax spending it in this country? They need to contribute to the economy as well as us pensioners.

It's all very well saying what we would do if the worse came to the worst but we are saying this when we are still comppos mentis.

Unfortunately we can live in a suitable property, as my relative did in a retirement village which was just right for her needs, but then dementia took over and it was no longer possible for her to stay there.

Apricity I have an elderly relative with dementia in a nursing home there and despite seeming ideal, yes, it is understaffed.

No matter how well we future-proof our homes, say we will never let this happen to us and that we would rather visit Switzerland etc, it is often taken out of our hands and we have no say in the matter in the end.

We have just experienced Care ( a oxymoron ) in the Community. We had a lovely company caring for our 95 year old FIL ( our 6th and last oldie, to be still alive) but they closed.

He was taken on by another firm a couple of weeks ago, Recommended to us by the area Adult Social services.
My BIL lives about 12 miles away ( he is chronically ill) but because of the behaviour of this disgusting Care company, had heroically been visiting his Father every day.
However, he was able to have a Saturday off, because one of my sons ( a Doctor ) and his wife ( A health visitor ) were travelling over 100 miles to visit their Grandad.
When they arrived at 1.30 pm, the curtains were drawn and they found their GD still in bed, sodden wet and hungry, as no one had come since the previous evening. We were all incandescent with fury. How can a company operate with no mechanism in place to notify anyone that a carer, hadn’t turned up ? My son phoned them and their reply was at the best nonchalant. We have reported them.
I then interested myself in my FILs care. I researched a care company ( it had four stars.)in the area that acts independently of the Social services, to find out their rates. They charge £27 an hour but only do hourly visits.
Multiplied that by 4 a day, multiplied by 7 days a week = £756 a week. This is only for care in the home, no food, no heat, and no laundry or clothes. The Adult Social services doesn’t use them as they are deemed too expensive !
We have children and hope to leave them something, but we will also need pots of money so that we don’t fall into the hands of cowboys and are assured of getting the best care.

Many Care companies are closing. The poor in England are really * f***ked. The super rich are fine. We are in the middle, range...just very comfortable. . It’s is absolutely scary, as without money and family to protect you, gawd help you.
Personally I intend to commit Suicide. We have families who are doctors and have told us how to do it painlessly.

Seeing so many old close family go through the ‘ end game ‘ is depressing. And we are a resourceful, well off family, full of Doctors and professionals. God help the family without the intellect or resources to fight-for their vulnerable old.
I can’t see it getting any easier in the future.

I would never live in a nursing home, I ran three at various points in my life, and those were very different to the norm. The residents were treated as adults, made their own choices about when to get up or sleep...where to eat and what to eat. If they liked alcohol they were free to drink, that was between them and their GP..ditto relationships with other residents. We, the staff, provided the support that was required but didn't act like prison officers or Nannies. Its nigh on impossible to find homes run for the benefit of the residents...so my husband and myself, he was a doctor, will choose our time and depart like Thelma and Louise!

Reading all the foregoing I feel lucky that at the age of 96 I can still live alone in my own home. I do have health and mobility problems and last year after being hospitalised after complications from cancer treatment, was sent to a care home for ‘rehabilitation’. After one week I couldn’t get out of there quickly enough. It was like a prison sentence. I was in great pain and half an hour after ringing for help was told I would have to wait two hours for the medicine trolley. For two days I was not helped to wash or shower.
I do own my bungalow but rely on State pension and lower end Attendance Allowance. I am able to afford for help for two hours with housework etc. daily.

In my case M** simply stands for meds luckylegs.....

For many people, there is a very real possibility that they may outlive their money. I am not surprised that people are wanting to save.

I cannot speak to the UK, but here in Canada (where I live at least), if you move into a facility, as long as it's not a private facility, your health care is covered. You DO have to pay for room and board, and the province sets how much that cost is.

There are private nursing homes and care facilities, and those cost more. If you want additional services, such as laundry done for you by the facility, there is also an added cost to that, and some recreational activities (e.g. if you're going out to a performance or something) may cost extra as well.