Patronising references to being elderly

I don’t believe it is anything to do with age at all I heard my grandson say it about his girlfriend recently when I asked how she was doing at a new job
I think that it’s just some posters interpretations

Maywalk I just love that headlights expression. It made me smile. I must remember it for if /when I need it.

I really don't care. If I felt someone was being rude and patronising I would say, otherwise its just a figure of speech.

I don't mind and I suspect I am guilty of it too. I call everyone pet, which is what DH calls me.

The one I do not like for some reason is aw bless. My GP said that to me recently. 🤣

If it's kindly meant and polite I don't mind at all. I can't be bothered taking offence at things like this.

Nor me AGAA4.

I don't care what they call me as long as its not too late for my dinner.

It’s the pat on the shoulder and “would you like help going on the self scan till” I am a woman and I am a Scouser brought up to speak my mind always to anyone. I don’t hold back that I do not need help thank you very much.
Don’t get me wrong I am firm but polite but patronising behaviour does rub me up the wrong way. I am convinced the white hair has you stereotyped as being incapable.

I don't mind love, dear, pet etc I hate duck, but that is because I hear that I waddle like a duck! My issue I know. However "aw bless" does sound patronising. It sounds like the person saying it thinks the receiver is a child. Maybe it is well meant, but I think it should be discussed. If the user realizes that some people find it patronising and slightly insulting, then surely they would make sure to never say it to anyone again.

I’m sure some people look for something to bristle about.

I’m sure you’re right Meryl. I’m happy with any term of endearment and grateful for any offer of help, whether I need it or not.

I’m in the US, but it’s the same here. I’m called “dear” and “sweetheart” quite often. I’m 64! Many restaurants offer a senior discount which usually begins at 55, sometimes it’s 60. Before I was 55 I was being offered the senior discount. It really hurt my feelings but eventually I decided to embrace my “old age” and not let people bother me. I actually like being older and I enjoy the liberation that comes from letting go of caring about what other people think.

If you feel patronised, try responding with ‘Cheers, sweet cheeks’. Equally cringey but it gets your point over pretty effectively.

Germansheperdsmum love your post pet! From a real Geordie!

A common phrase when someone sneezed was always ‘ bless you ‘

I haven’t noticed as bless. Not sure what that says about me.
If I feel patronised I say something like. ‘I could run upstairs quickly [or whatever] when I was your age, and I daresay you’ll be slower when you’re my age.’ I resent the tacit assumption that older people are born that way just to be awkward.

Is it a regional thing? I don’t hear it where I live in Scotland. I’ve just travelled the length of Britain and the ‘Bless You’s started at the Rugby services on the M1. Likewise, no one here says larte for latte, that also begins somewhere on the M6 or M40.

Thanks Harris pet!

I quite like it really. I don't mind what people call me as long as it's kindly meant. The doctor's receptionist called me "my lovely" recently which made me smile as I'm not a bit lovely.

I use the word bless to my D when she’s telling me what my GC have done. If someone takes it as a derogatory term that’s up to them but it’s not my intention. I think a lot of stuff is overthought.

It’s not derogatory as such, but it’s more appropriate to small children, which is why many people don’t like it- we are not children.

I don't like aw bless either but heard myself saying it the other day. 😮

I accept help graciously, I hope, but I do want to remind some folk that one day, if they're lucky, they'll be my age.

A young woman on the bus today was sharing her front seat, marked for elderly or disabled, with a Primark bag. I think she saw my look as I walked to the back.

I then saw a man get on who had difficulty walking and the Primark bag swiftly moved to her lap as he sat beside her.😊 I stopped scowling.

If you said aw bless here they would think you were a member of some strange religious cult. Never hear it.

I call my granddaughter sweetheart because that is exactly what she is.

The other day, in just one small transaction, I was called “my lovely”, told “aw bless” and “bless your heart”. This was in quite a posh shop too.

People are more inclined to say 'Aw, bless!' when I show them a photo of my toddler DGD than when I admit to being 83, but it does seem to apply to both ends of the age scale.