Limericks 7

I don't feel like brushing my teeth tonight
So I'll skip it they'll be alright
Into the glass jar they go
And no one need know

I don`t feel like brushing my teeth tonight
So I`ll skip it they`ll be alright
Into the glass jar they go
And no one need ever know
Till the see that they`re not quite as bright.

I don't feel like brushing my teeth tonight
So I'll skip it they'll be alright
Into the glass jar they go
And no one need know
Tomorrow I'll scrub them so bright.

Then I'll offer a wide toothy grin

Oops.
Do you have a first line callgirl?

Then I'll offer a wide toothy grin
My falsies will look like a new pin

Then I'll offer a wide toothy grin
My falsies will look like a new pin
Next morning , they'd gone!

Then I'll offer a wide toothy grin
My falsies will look like a new pin
Next morning , they'd gone!
A sight when I yawned

Then I'll offer a wide toothy grin
My falsies will look like a new pin
Next morning , they'd gone!
A sight when I yawned
Really I just can't win

I won a tenner on scratch card

I won a tenner on scratch card
Spending it won't be too hard

I won a tenner on a scratch card
Spending it won't be too hard
Wish it was bigger

I won a tenner on a scratch card
Spending it won't be too hard
Wish it was bigger
A six number figure

I won a tenner on a scratch card
Spending it won't be too hard
Wish it was bigger
A six number figure
Then I would need a bodyguard

I’d be sure he was handsome and strong

I’d be sure he was handsome and strong
I wouldn't mind if he wore a sarong

I’d be sure he was handsome and strong
I wouldn't mind if he wore a sarong
He’d have to be fit

I'd be sure he was handsome and strong
I wouldn't mind if he wore a sarong
He'd have to be fit
With plenty of grit

I'd be sure he was handsome and strong
I wouldn't mind if he wore a sarong
He'd have to be fit
With plenty of grit
These wishes - is there anything wrong?

Oh, where have my dark tresses gone ?

Oh, where have my dark tresses gone ?
My gray, thinning locks look so woefully wrong!

Oh, where have my dark tresses gone ?
My gray, thinning locks look so woefully wrong!
But then I’m quite old

Oh, where have my dark tresses gone?
My gray, thinning locks look so woefully wrong!
But then I`m quite old
Or so I`ve been told,

Oh, where have my dark tresses gone?
My gray, thinning locks look so woefully wrong!
But then I`m quite old
Or so I`ve been told,
And depressingly like King Kong

I really should shave all my bits

I really should shave all my bits
But I'm very fond of my hairy arm pits

I really should shave all my bits
But I'm very fond of my hairy arm pits
When I lift up my arms

I really should shave all my bits
But I'm very fond of my hairy arm pits
When I lift up my arms
To show off my charms

I really should shave all my bits
But I`m very fond of my hairy armpits
When I lift up my arms
To show off my charms
I scare the blokes out of their wits

I really don`t mind being hirsute