Limericks 8

One day a lonely woodworm left her floorboard home
She was looking for company, so decided to roam

One day a lonely woodworm left her floorboard home
She was looking for company, so decided to roam
She chewed into a chair

One day a lonely woodworm left her floorboard home
She was looking for company, so decided to roam
She chewed into a chair
Found a male woodworm there

One day a lonely woodworm left her floorboard home
She was looking for company, so decided to roam
She chewed into a chair
Found a male woodworm there
And now the chair leg looks like a comb

An earl sat on a chair which had a dubious leg

An earl sat on a chair which had a dubious leg
It buckled beneath him so he sat on a beer keg

An earl sat on a chair which had a dubious leg
It buckled beneath him so he sat on a beer keg
Oh no, that's not 'done'

Then it's off to the pub for a glass
If I wasn’t a lady , I would rhyme it with a—e
Well, it won't rhyme with bum!

Then its off to the pub for a glass
If I wasn't a lady, I would rhyme it with a--e
Well, it wont rhyme with bum!
This limericks a bit rum

I like your ideas grandtanteJE65, but to follow the limerick format I think we need a short line whose last word rhymes with 'done'. Something like 'Said his wife who's no fun', (but it doesn't have to be that).

An earl sat on a chair which had a dubious leg
It buckled beneath him so he sat on a beer keg
Oh no, that`s not done
I`ve had too much sun

An earl sat on a chair with a dubious leg
It buckled beneath him so he sat on a beer keg
Oh no, that's not done
I've had too much sun
Bring me a sun hat, I beg!

I think I am going quite bonkers

I think I am going quite bonkers
Instead of onions I cooked conkers

I think I am going quite bonkers
Instead of onions I cooked conkers
And now, for a drink,

I think I am going quite bonkers
Instead of onions I cooked conkers
And now, for a drink,
Pear cider I think,

I think I am going quite bonkers
Instead of onions I cooked conkers
And now, for a drink,
Pear cider I think,
Which may produce some unladylike stonkers

I may now be persona non grata

I may now be persona non grata
Don't worry, I'm in your alma mata

I may now be persona non grata
Don't worry, I'm in your alma mata
I'll try to keep my rhymes clean

I may now be persona non grata
Don't worry, I'm in your alma mata
I'll try to keep my rhymes clean
(That remains to be seen)

I may now be persona non grata
Don't worry, I'm in your alma mata
I'll try to keep my rhymes clean
(That remains to be seen)
While I'm thinking I'll cook a frittata

I'm yearning for a bag of crisps

I'm yearning for a bag of crisps
But these are all broken, in crumbs and wisps!

I'm yearning for a bag of crisps
But these are all broken, in crumbs and wisps!
So I'll have salted nuts

Though my dietician tuts!

I'm yearning for a bag of crisps
But these are all broken, in crumbs and wisps!
So I'll have salted nuts
Though my dietician tuts

I'm yearning for a bag of crisps
But these are all broken, in crumbs and wisps!
So I'll have salted nuts
Though my dietician tuts
And I'll eat healthy apples, even the pips.

But today it's strawberries and fattening cream!