Limericks 8

45 degrees! I know I'd not cope
Are we on climate’s slippery slope?

45 degrees! I know I`d not cope
Are we on climate`s slippery slope?
I`ve worn out my fan

45 degrees! I know I`d not cope
Are we on climate`s slippery slope?
I`ve worn out my fan
Awaiting the icecream van

45 degrees! I know I`d not cope
Are we on climate`s slippery slope?
I`ve worn out my fan
Awaiting the ice cream van
My hols at Scott Base give me hope.

I'm packing a nice furry swimsuit

I'm packing a nice furry swimsuit
The seals will find me so cute

I'm packing a nice furry swimsuit
The seals will find me so cute
With penguins I'll swim

I'm packing a nice furry swimsuit
The seals will find me so cute
With penguins I'll swim
I went out on a limb

I'm packing a nice furry swimsuit
The seals will find me so cute
With penguins I'll swim
I went out on a limb
I’ll be cosy, my body’s so hirsute.

Remember the first time you dated

Remember the first time you dated
My mum was so cross I was gated

Remember the first time you dated
My mum was so cross I was gated

Ooop s
Remember the first time you dated
My mum was so cross I was gated
I couldn't let him know

Remember the first time you dated
My mum was so cross I was gated
I couldn't let him know
Why I’d be a no-show

Remember the first time you dated
My mum was so cross I was gated
I couldn't let him know
Why I’d be a no-show
My first beau waited and waited.

That wasn't the end of this story

That wasn`t the end of this story
I found out that he voted Tory

That wasn`t the end of this story
I found out that he voted Tory

Oh no!
That wasn`t the end of this story
I found out that he voted Tory
That wasn't my party

That wasn`t the end of this story
I found out that he voted Tory
That wasn`t my party
Does that make me tarty?

That wasn`t the end of this story
I found out that he voted Tory
That wasn`t my party
Does that make me tarty?
Well it doesn't fill you with glory!

Must now walk the dog while it's cooler.

Must now walk the dog while it's cooler,
After that I'm going to the jeweller

Must now walk the dog while it's cooler,
After that I'm going to the jeweller
My watch needs mending

Must now walk the dog while it's cooler,
After that I'm going to the jeweller
My watch needs mending
My chain's lost the ending

I measured it with my new ruler.

Then it's off to the pub for a glass

Then it's off to the pub for a glass
Definitely not that awful old Bass

Then it's off to the pub for a glass
If I wasn’t a lady , I would rhyme it with a—e