Limericks 12

But what kind of book should I read?
Self help is probably what we need!
But I keep nodding off
As long as I don't cough

But what kind of book should I read?
Self help is probably what we need!
But I keep nodding off
As long as I don't cough
I’ll be able to do the deed .....

What ‘deed’ is that, I hear you say

What ‘deed’ is that, I hear you say
Is it one that will grant you pay?

But what kind of book should I read?
Self Help is probably what we need!
But I keep nodding off
Except when I cough

Sorry, didn't refresh

What ‘deed’ is that, I hear you say
Is it one that will grant you pay?
Should I call a friend?

What "deed" is that, I hear you say
Is it one that will grant you pay?
Should I call a friend?
What do you intend?

What "deed" is that, I hear you say
Is it one that will grant you pay?
Should I call a friend?
What do you intend?
The ''deed' might be one to lead you astray

Will you take a dare or tell the truth

Will you take a dare or tell the truth
Are you under the watch of a sleuth

Will you take a dare or tell the truth
Are you under the watch of a sleuth,
Possibly Colombo

Will you take a dare or tell the truth
Are you under the watch of a sleuth,
Possibly Colombo
But I’m still in limbo

Will you take a dare or tell the truth
Are you under the watch of a sleuth,
Possibly Colombo
But I’m still in limbo
With a loose tooth

Getting a set of dentures

Getting a set of dentures
Is one of life`s daunting ventures,

Getting a set of dentures
Is one of life`s daunting ventures,
The alternative’s worse

Getting a set of dentures
Is one of life`s daunting ventures,
The alternative’s worse
Can't eat or sing a verse

Getting a set of dentures
Is one of life`s daunting ventures,
The alternative’s worse
Can't eat or sing a verse
Sound like appetite quenchers

While walking the dog in the rain

While walking the dog in the rain
I fell into a puddle - oh, the pain!!!

While walking the dog in the rain
I fell into a puddle - oh, the pain!!!
How my husband laughed

While walking the dog in the rain
I fell into a puddle - oh, the pain!!!
How my husband laughed
He thought it was quite daft

While walking the dog in the rain
I fell into a puddle - oh, the pain!!!
How my husband laughed
He thought it quite daft
And begged me to do it again!

Now I didn’t think it that funny

Now I didn’t think it that funny
But if it keeps the old misery sunny..

Now I didn’t think it that funny
But if it keeps the old misery sunny..
I'll do it and do it

Now I didn’t think it that funny
But if it keeps the old misery sunny..
I'll do it and do it
But I won't omit

Now I didn’t think it that funny
But if it keeps the old misery sunny..
I'll do it and do it
But I won't omit
To tell him "I've had enough, hunny!!!!"

There's always something to moan about

There's always something to moan about
If that there's absolutely no doubt

There's always something to moan about
OF that there's absolutely no doubt