The Alphabet Bar ( all welcome!)

Oh my word, the "tone" in this 'ere bar has been lowered somewhat. I had hoped that some classiness might come about now that I am a frequent visitor. Seems not!

Quick soop come and take refuge in the more refined wine bar at the back, I managed to steal the key!!

Perhaps not , maybe I've drank too much already, seems I'm not paying attention to my Ps &Qs so I may be a bad influence

Right you are, CherryC, I'm in need of some refinement.

soop how can you say that you're refained after all that schmozzel last Christmas? Eh? We know what went on! wink wink

soop where’s our pies and buns ?. You’ve spent so long in here drinking you’re neglecting the cooking, we’ve got nothing to sell. soop, soop ....where are you soop. ? strange I could have sworn she was here a minute ago.

chewy I’m plucked chewy, I can’t find a plucker anywhere ?
cherry Ps and Qs ? love it.

Tea cakes maturing in the oven. The flour was a bit iffy. Sell by 1999. Should be edible now that I've cooked them to within a a charred crumb ...all in the name of hygiene.

Unless you de-weavilled that flour soop how are we gonna sell em? Doodle d'ya wanna giant tweezers? They belonged to my mother's cousin, but if we put em in a giant vat of disinfectant they oughta do the trick .

Very unwise to use giant tweezers to pick out the weevil imo. Far better to just bake them in and tell the punters they're sesame seeds.

What do you mean Chewy? that's what we've been doing for years in the other place, that has no name except Th Argy
You were the one on cook duty who told me to scoop up all the capers from the cellar floor and add them to the pickle ecutrements on the bar counter. Where's your finesse gone?

lemon don't we put protein in the Alphabetti food anymore? flounces off to the loo to sulk
I blame that cherry or soop, their food praktices are precarious and I suspect they're in 'Cahoots', you know, that new vegan bar down the road ??????

Xeptional!! You think I'm Vegan ? The tweezers, you moo were for the turkey!! But I'm still too far refined for eating weevils don't ya knaw. Stuff that ? instead and get it in't oven.

You can’t cook it till I’ve plucked it. I need those feathers for chewy’s outfit. She’ll be naked otherwise ?

Zsa Zsa Gaboreally is the look I'm aiming for Doodle so lots of feathers needed. Have you any pheasant feathers?

A bit over the top there chewy. No pheasant, I’ve got 1 budgie, 2 pigeon, and 3 assorted from an old feather duster. Is that any help? ?

Budgie feathers? Have you seen the size of my rear end? And what will the pheasant plucker's son do if you haven't any pheasant feathers? Really Doodle, you're going to have to find some.

Crumbs laid out in the woods........here pheasant....pretty pheasant.....I’ve got some of soops tea cakes for you....come on .... nothing to worry about...you’ll be quite safe....cherry you and carillion get ready with the big net....I think one is coming this way....ssh?

Doodle, if you were a pheasant would you be willing to be lured in by some of soops tea cake crumbs? Hmmm? And even if a pheasant did eat the crumbs, there's no way it will be running anywhere for a while is there? How about some of those weevils we've got from soops flour?

Every so often, my feelings are hurt. My buns are fine specimens. Tasteless, maybe. Rather hard to chew (especially when wearing dentures) but...I made them with a good heart. Even the pheasant shows no gratitude.

Frightfully sorry soop. I’m sure the pheasant would love to give your buns a good peck but I couldn’t get it to come down from the tree. I finally resorted to throwing your buns at I and at last got it on the back of the head. It is now lying unconscious (? ?) at my feet. I am about to call for the pheasant pluckers son to pluck my prostate pheasant. As it’s a little chilly, would someone please knit a little woolly jumper for the poor thing.?

Goodness gracious me, Doodle that's no way to treat an innocent prostrate pheasant. I shall donate my Fair Isle boob tube for said pheasant. It's good quality but a tad itchy against my delicate skin.

Hope it's a big pheasant soop

In fact it would need to be, Chew When I had both titties I wore a 36 G bra. Still do, only one cup now contains a pretend tittie. No complaints.

Just a minute soop, I think that have I the biggest in this bar! My bras look like aircraft hangars! They're so big, that I once found my son and his little cousin with my bra on their heads; one cup each!

Kor!!! What corkers. I might have known that yours were bigger than mine.

Lol! Thanks for that soop!