Limericks 14

A weather forecaster from Cheshire
Predicted a week.of high pressure

A weather forecaster from Cheshire
Predicted a week of high pressure
The sun should shine brightly

A weather forecaster from Cheshire
Predicted a week of high pressure
The sun should shine brightly
18 degrees nightly

A weather forecaster from Cheshire
Predicted a week of high pressure,
The sun should shine brightly
Eighteen degrees nightly
Cool showers will keep us all fresher.

A cow and a sheep and a horse,

A cow and a sheep and a horse,
Together were a tour de force

A cow and a sheep and a horse,
Together were a tour de force
But they ate all the grass

cow and a sheep and a horse,
Together were a tour de force
But they ate all the grass
And left the field sparse

A cow and a sheep and a horse
Together were a tour we force
But they ate all the grass (that word rhymes with gas up North, tee hee)
And left the field sparse,
And the farmer was angry of course.

The great North/South divide

The great North/South divide
Means one’s accent is harder to hide

The great North/South divide
Means one's accent is harder to hide
But under the skin

The great North/South divide
Means one's accent is harder to hide
But under the skin
We’re all kith and kin

The great North/South divide
Means one's accent is harder to hide
But under the skin
We’re all kith and kin
And it’s no matter where we reside

A tiresome joker from Poole

A tiresome joker from Poole
Was always playing the fool

A tiresome joker from Poole
Was always playing the fool
But he came a cropper

A tiresome joker from Poole
Was always playing the fool
But he came a cropper
Riding his space hopper

A tiresome joker from Poole
Was always playing the fool
But he came a cropper
Using a lopper

Ooops henetha
A tiresome joker from Poole
Was always playing the fool
But he came a cropper
Riding his space hopper

Sorry....

A tiresome joker from Poole
Was always playing the fool
But he came a cropper
Riding his space hopper
With no teeth he can only drool .

For he went base over apex

For he went base over apex
Trying a move rather complex

For he went base over apex
Trying a move rather complex
He didn't half look silly

For he went base over apex
Trying a move rather complex
He didn't half look silly
In his leotard so frilly

For he went base over apex
Trying a move rather complex
He didn't half look silly
In his leotard so frilly
Made for one of the fairer sex!

My other half wants to go swimming

My other half wants to go swimming
To help with his post lockdown trimming

My other half wants to go swimming
To help with his post lockdown trimming
Just leave off the pies,