Limericks 14

In the meanwhile, to the hardware store I'll go
For tools and timber to build an annexe for Flo

In the meanwhile, to the hardware store I'll go
For tools and timber to build an annexe for Flo
She's the mother-in-law

In the meanwhile, to the hardware store I'll go
For tools and timber to build an annexe for Flo
She's the mother-in-law
Whose ability to 'gnaw'

In the meanwhile, to the hardware store I'll go
For tools and timber to build an annexe for Flo
She's the mother-in-law
Whose ability to 'gnaw'
Has driven me mad in my bungalow.

Now the roads are quiet I can hear birdsong

Now the roads are quiet I can hear birdsong
It's heaven away from the usual throng

Now the roads are quiet I can hear birdsong
It's heaven away from the usual throng
On the M6 there’s hush

Now the roads are quiet I can hear birdsong
It's heaven away from the usual throng
On the M6 there’s hush
I think I hear a thrush

Now the roads are quiet I hear birdsong,
It's heaven away from the throng,
On the M6 there's hush,
I thing I hear a thrush,
But then again I could be wrong! (It might be a blackbird!)

Said a man to his wife, "What is that?"

Said a man to his wife, "What IS that?"
“To me it looks like a very big cat”

Said a man to his wife, "What IS that?"
“To me it looks like a very big cat”
It could be the leopard

Said a man to his wife, "What IS that?"
“To me it looks like a very big cat”
It could be the leopard
That was chased by the shepherd

Said a man to his wife, "What IS that?"
“To me it looks like a very big cat”
It could be the leopard
That was chased by the shepherd
Before he tripped over. Splat!

There’s sunshine here in Torquay

There’s sunshine here in Torquay
But clouds forming up in Billerickay

There's sunshine here in Torquay
But clouds forming up in Billerickay
I'll go for a lone walk

There's sunshine here in Torquay
But clouds forming up in Billerickay
I'll go for a lone walk
Hope that cat doesn't stalk!

There’s sunshine here in Torquay
But clouds forming up in Billerickay
I'll go for a lone walk
Hope that cat doesn't stalk!
Nor bring home some vermin for tea!

My darling OH is in France

My darling OH is in France
The virus separated us by chance

My darling OH is in France
The virus separated us by chance
I want him back

My darling OH is in France,
The virus separated us by chance,
I want him back
And also a snack

My darling OH is in France,
The virus separated us by chance,
I want him back
And also a snack
Can I order both in advance?

Hooray, I've booked a delivery slot

Hooray, I've booked a delivery slot
They're like gold dust, so glad that I got

Hooray, I've booked a delivery slot,
They're like gold dust, so glad that I got,
The essentials I need,

Hooray, I've booked a delivery slot,
They're like gold dust, so glad that I got,
The essentials I need,
And even bird seed