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Limericks 15

(1001 Posts)
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Jangran99 Wed 01-Jul-20 09:39:57

Carrying on from

My garden was glad of the rain
Me too, 'cos watering's such a pain
The lawn is all soggy
Squelch and boggy

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May7 Tue 04-Aug-20 18:36:34

The morning sun was shining bright

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crazyH Tue 04-Aug-20 18:53:06

The morning sun was shining bright
Went for a walk in the morning light

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Annum Tue 04-Aug-20 23:03:41

The morning sun was shining bright
Went for a walk in the morning lighT
Bumped into my ex

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Squiffy Tue 04-Aug-20 23:38:02

The morning sun was shining bright
Went for a walk in the morning lighT
Bumped into my ex
As I did a text

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crazyH Wed 05-Aug-20 00:03:40

The morning sun was shining bright
Went for a walk in the morning lighT
Bumped into my ex
As I did a text
He said "good Lord, you look a sight!!!"

My blood, it did begin to boil

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Elrel Wed 05-Aug-20 00:22:44

My blood, it did begin to boil
It’s blue because I’m really royal

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crazyH Wed 05-Aug-20 00:33:52

My blood, it did begin to boil
It’s blue because I’m really royal
I'm too good for him

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Juliet27 Wed 05-Aug-20 07:29:27

My blood, it did begin to boil
It’s blue because I’m really royal
I'm too good for him
Married on a whim

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henetha Wed 05-Aug-20 10:47:16

My blood, it did begin to boil
It’s blue because I’m really royal
I'm too good for him
Married on a whim
He's never done an honest day's toil.

In fact, he spent six years in jail

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Squiffy Wed 05-Aug-20 11:00:28

In fact, he spent six years in jail
Without any option of bail

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Jangran99 Wed 05-Aug-20 11:03:52

In fact, he spent six years in jail
Without any option of bail
But now that he's free

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libra10 Wed 05-Aug-20 11:10:28

In fact, he spent six years in jail
Without any option of bail
But now that he's free
He will have to agree

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lovebeigecardigans1955 Wed 05-Aug-20 11:47:28

In fact, he spent six years in jail
Without any option of bail
But now that he's free
He will have to agree
His behaviour was beyond the pale.

Each day he reports to probation

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Squiffy Wed 05-Aug-20 11:51:24

Each day he reports to probation
He attends with much trepidation

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Annum Wed 05-Aug-20 16:21:23

Each day he reports to probation
He attends with much trepidation
They question him hard

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Elrel Wed 05-Aug-20 16:51:59

Each day he reports to probation
He attends with much trepidation
They question him hard
But he thinks he’s a card

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Squiffy Wed 05-Aug-20 17:05:37

Each day he reports to probation
He attends with much trepidation
They question him hard
But he thinks he’s a card
The Crim King of our great nation.

My word, how he longed to escape

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crazyH Wed 05-Aug-20 17:38:33

My word, how he longed to escape
He got 'time' for assault and rape

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Annum Wed 05-Aug-20 23:39:50

My word, how he longed to escape
He got 'time' for assault and rape
The charges were phoney

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Juliet27 Thu 06-Aug-20 07:41:00

My word, how he longed to escape
He got 'time' for assault and rape
The charges were phoney
A load of baloney

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henetha Thu 06-Aug-20 10:39:27

My word, how he longed to escape
He got 'time' for assault and rape
The charges were phoney
A load of baloney
And mixed up with a lot of red tape.

So he decided to launch an Appeal

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Squiffy Thu 06-Aug-20 10:52:14

So he decided to launch an Appeal
Claiming the charges were not real

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Annum Thu 06-Aug-20 13:26:58

So he decided to launch an Appeal
Claiming the charges were not real
The case was dismissed

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crazyH Thu 06-Aug-20 15:25:57

So he decided to launch an Appeal
Claiming the charges were not real
The case was dismissed
His character dissed

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Annum Thu 06-Aug-20 15:33:38

So he decided to launch an Appeal
Claiming the charges were not real
The case was dismissed
His character dissed
He was jolly hard done by, I feel!

He’s now off to live in Japan

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