Limericks 18, Rides again

Pet owners will sometimes complain
Firework bangs drive their dogs insane
So keep them inside
Let all noise subside

Pet owners will sometimes complain
Firework bangs drive their dogs insane
Keep them safely inside
Where they will then hide

Pet owners will sometimes complain
Firework bangs drive their dogs insane
Keep them safely inside
Where they will then hide
Til its safe to go out again

I love the whizz bangs and rockets

Pet owners will sometimes complain
Firework bangs drive their dogs insane
Keep them safely inside
Where they will then hide
‘Specially my rather large Great Dane

He’s a big old softie at heart

He’s a big old softie at heart
I took to him right from the start

He’s a big old softie at heart
I took to him right from the start
Despite being tall

He’s a big old softie at heart
I took to him right from the start
Despite being tall
He loves playing ball

He’s a big old softie at heart
I took to him right from the start
Despite being tall
He loves playing ball
And he cries when we are apart

He takes up most of the room

He takes up most of the room
When he barks, it’s a sonic boom

He takes up most of the room
When he barks, it’s a sonic boom
The neighbours complain

He takes up most of the room
When he barks, it’s a sonic boom
The neighbours complain
With marked disdain

He takes up most of the room
When he barks, it's a sonic boom
The neighbours complain
With marked disdain
I'll go and take him to 'Toon'

It looks like a Geordie girl here

It looks like a Geordie girl here
How did you guess it, that’s quite rare

Whilst baking a cake for free

It looks like a Geordie girl here
How did you guess it, that’s quite rare
Whilst baking a cake for free
And a sly drink just for me

It looks like a Geordie girl here
How did you guess it, that's quite rare
Whilst baking a cake for free
And a sly drink for me
For me it's a liquor of pear

I'm off out for dinner tonight

I’m off out for dinner tonight
With a boy, who does like a fright

I’m off out for dinner tonight
With a boy, who does like a fright
He says he likes it rough

I’m off out for dinner tonight
With a boy, who does like a fright
He says he likes it rough
And pretends to be tough

I’m off out for dinner tonight
With a boy, who does like a fright
He says he likes it rough
And pretends to be tough
I sneezed, he was out like a light

The cats were at play on the lawn

The cats were at play on the lawn
They screeched and they squealed until dawn

The cats were at play on the lawn
They screeched and they squealed until dawn
They don't like the rain

The cats were at play on the lawn
They screeched and they squealed until dawn
They don't like the rain
And stare out with distain

The cats were at play on the lawn
They screeched and they squealed until dawn
They don't like the rain
And stare out with distain
I wish that the rain would be gone

I just bought a book that is scary

I just bought a book that is scary
About a malignant fairy