Who’s the Daddy and where is my sister.

if no one else in your ancestry line has done their DNA you won't find any connection!.

Fernbergien

I hope I am allowed to put this stuff on Gransnet as don’t want to upset or annoy anyone.
Son been doing tree on and off for some time now and then had DNA done. Very surprising when it came back
Thought it would help re finding half sister but no luck there. Adopted. DOB 10/07/43.
But apparently my dad is not the man mother was married to! Checking back through it could appear that he was Scottish - Aberdeen.
Hope no rules broken here. I am just a big mystery!
Any advice could be useful. Be kind.

This is precisely why I feel hesitant about this kind of DNA research. Do any of us want to be told now, when we no longer can ask them, if our parents actually were, biologically speaking, our parents? I certainly do not. Not that I need to worry as there are scores of photos that clearly point to the fact that my father is precisely who I always thought he was.

However, many a woman in former times married the man who was prepared to act as the father of her child, rather than the one who physically was the father.

If her husband was a good man who loved her and their children, does it really matter whether he physically speaking was the father?

Re above. So much found out. One of my distant cousins was judge in the Ricky Tomlinson case. In my mother’s line two brothers married two sisters. All lived together in house that is now 5* hotel. Alsogreatgreat grand uncle was prominent building Victoria Bridge in Canada.both him and his brother were engineers. People keep saying write about it all including the shooting., But I am a maths person.

Did find my sister. Her daughter did DNA and contacted son about six months after we did ours. She WAS adopted by policeman. The contact was one of two new nieces and I have two sons. Sister not like me in looks but there are other similarities ie both like quizzes and William Morris. From the nieces have got three great grand nephews. Oldest one just gone up to Oxford. His mum who contacted us is a proffesor of Marhematics which links to us more than her Mum and Dad. So much we are finding out.

Fernbergien

I hope I am allowed to put this stuff on Gransnet as don’t want to upset or annoy anyone.
Son been doing tree on and off for some time now and then had DNA done. Very surprising when it came back
Thought it would help re finding half sister but no luck there. Adopted. DOB 10/07/43.
But apparently my dad is not the man mother was married to! Checking back through it could appear that he was Scottish - Aberdeen.
Hope no rules broken here. I am just a big mystery!
Any advice could be useful. Be kind.

In UK there are many " register here for family re-connection" websites for people separated by adoption, from birth parents and siblings. You might find your sister that way.

As the DNA kit is sometimes given as a Christmas present you could be receiving new members to your family tree, in the near future.

Haven’t written on here for sometime. Still getting responses. Got a picture of young man that my husband mistook for the son doing the genealogy. ,
Looked like son holding a pint. Grandson of another sister via father who died when she was 38.
Every one we meet we get an immediate
connection too.Also so many bright interesting people. I think there might be other relations out there as father seemed popular with ladies in Farnborough Hampshire.

Thank you for the helpful tip. I’m so pleased all has worked out well for you, that you see many similarities and now feel better. A happy reunion on lots of levels.

Don’t forget if you want to trace an adopted relative don’t pay an agency go to your local county council.in my case Hampshire . Made many phone calls and got passed around but got there in the end. Very helpful. Got interviewed on line. They had no success re tracing my sister and said it would have to be done by private agency after all which was quite expensive then 24 hours later had contact from niece who had had her DNA done.
Found out that on both sides accountancy law engineering and maths. And now computers so naughty but bright genes. It has made me feel better about myself as I had been made to feel nothing as a child and teenager.

Thank you for your update Fernbergien. I’m so pleased all went well, that there were big hugs and grins, that it all felt very natural. What a happy result for everyone. It’s entirely up to you if you wish to reveal more.

Nannagarra ( and others) thank you. We met up on Wednesday at their rented place and we didn’t cry. Just big grins and hugs. We are very different as I am small and have mid brown hair (aided) and wear a little makeup and she is tall and grey hair and overall much bigger. But we seem to like the same things ( William Morris) . And many other things. Eldest niece and family there too.
Next day big lunch at nice pub was 14 as youngest niece there plus my two sons plus kids and partners.The two girl cousins goton with my two sons. It was if we had always known each other. So natural. And it all came from my naughty mother.
All the kids are exceptionally bright.
If you want to know more I am happy to tell.

How thrilling to find your sister,fernbergian
I shared my DNA from Ancestry to My heritage but there were no closer matches on there.
My sister and 2 of my AC have done theirs so it's fun to be told I'm related to these folk!
I have also confirmed family rumours about DGF.

Floradora9 I knew you could upload a is it gedcom? file but I am not technically savvy enough to do that.
Does that give you access to other sites?

Fernbergien, I’ve enjoyed learning you’ve solved the mystery of your biological father, caught up with your half sister and her family and met your cousin. That your younger son resembles Jill’s deceased brother in looks, build, mannerisms and movements plus has the same profession is astounding. What an amazing detective your son is.
Apart from finding some babies born very soon after marriage…ahem….I have nothing to parallel your news. For the most part it’s mundane except for an ancestor born in Southern Europe at a time when records weren’t really kept and name spellings were inconsistent. DNA is my only hope of a link.
Will you let us know how you get on when you meet your sister, other niece and family in a week’s time?
Tracing family history is fascinating and absorbs me for hours.

Esspee

**Fernbergien*. Your half sister may never have had her DNA tested and even if she had she might have used a different company to do it. I feel it is crazy that all these DNA companies do not “talk to each other”. How much better it would be if for genealogical purposes their findings were pooled.
Being born in 1943 there is a good chance that she is no longer alive. Have you her name after adoption? If so presumably you have looked for her marriage and death online.
My first stop would be the adoption organisations in the town she was adopted from. I am sure there are books suggesting how to search for adopted people. Wouldn’t it be lovely to find her. Good luck.

You can share your DNA on three different sites if you use Ancestry to do the testing .

Oopsadaisy1

PS you will only find siblings if they also have their DNA samples on the family research sites you are on.

But if there is no DNA match at all to the OP's supposed dad or his family he cannot be her dad.

Sorry for misnaming you earlier Fernbergien

Golly.what a mix. I appear to be half Yorkshire and quarter Shropshire. Not that much a Southener. Things seem to prove right re DNA and son’s detective work. It is all so interesting.

I had mine done recently, I was surprised I haven't that much English DNA, some, but far less than I thought I don't particularly care I always knew I was a mix but somehow it was a bit surprising. More Irish which I think is wrong my grandmother was only half Irish so therefore 25% is too much. On the other hand paternal grandfather wholly Maltese/Sicilian I get only 20% but some from Anatolia and The Caucuses which is news to me, plus a mix of France/Germany, including 10 per cent Jewish people of Europe, Norwegian 10%, Vikings I presume! and a dash of Welsh.

Yes very exciting Esspee. Also there’s was a shooting. The ne’er- do - well second husband to great grandmother demanded money but none left he’d spent the lot. When he produced a gun grandmother raised her hand to protect her mother and a bullet went through her hand,! Found out so much.going back further found out because they were rich also philanthropic. They did a lot for villagers. Successful civil engineers. Bit like Brunel.

Fernbergien How exciting. I have tested on 23 and me and Ancestry and have made lots of contacts abroad and here, actually meeting up with quite a few cousins. I highly recommend it as a hobby to anyone (except pearl clutchers).

I have heard that one in four DNA searches ends up finding “secrets”.
I was not surprised. It has been exciting.

My Aberdeen grandfather had a few children with women who were not his wives Franbern. When you start digging it’s not that unusual!

Fernbergien

Thanks everyone. Am going to get my DNA done soon. My mum had three daughters. All different fathers. She got around a lot!!!

Back again. Original post on 24/I/21.
A lot gone on. Have met youngest niece ( sisters daughter) and it went fine. A lot of yak.
Also met cousin re my Dad. Again fine. She(Jill) was shocked when she saw younger son. He went out front door to greet her and shewas shocked as he looked like her deceased brother moved like him built like him same mannerisms. Both Accountants.
In one week meeting sister and other niece and family for first time.
An amazing covid time for us. Trying to find my half brothers family in Australia. Was in local paper.
If you can handle it have a go. Younger son very good detective. As I had a “funny” childhood it did not worry me. Everyone seems our sort of people. Made me feel better about myself as my non family weren’t always nice.

How exiting for you, Fernbergien.

I haven't done any research yet, but already know that I am likely to have as yet unknown relations out there.
My mum was illegitimate, and although there is no one left who might know the name of her biological father, it is believed that he was a married man with children.

I am so tempted to start a DNA search ... .