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little boys

(35 Posts)
ninathenana Sun 29-Jul-12 15:27:33

DGS is now 3 1/2 and constantly "plays " with himself smile I know this is natural and common.
DD tells him several times a day that it's not nice. I have read that it's best to ignor it all together.
I don't remember having this problem with DS at this age. How have you dealt with this problem.

whenim64 Sun 29-Jul-12 15:55:31

Just ignore it nina unless he does it in public! He'll grow out of it. It's just one of many irritating habits little boys seem to delight in, such as constantly clearing their throats, grimacing, swinging their legs constantly, blinking every few seconds....and on and on grin

shysal Sun 29-Jul-12 16:09:04

If anyone is watching the current Big Brother, there is a 25 year old 'little boy' who seems to be constantly playing with himself (Conor). Some of them never grow out of it!

ninathenana Sun 29-Jul-12 16:16:44

when yes he does it indiscriminately smile

Any time any place, clothes or no clothes !

whenim64 Sun 29-Jul-12 16:37:24

Can you distract him whilst ignoring the behaviour nina? Give him something else to keep his hands occupied? Perhaps that's why so many parents give their children a Nntendo DS to play with hmm

kittylester Sun 29-Jul-12 16:39:54

when that made me smile

numberplease Sun 29-Jul-12 17:36:02

When littlest grandson was just 3, he really tickled me when he said "it`s getting bigger Grandma"!

glitabo Sun 29-Jul-12 17:40:38

It must be confusing for him when he is told it is not nice, as he obviously thinks it is.
I do not know little boy who does not do this but most generally become more discreet, but at 3 1/2 its part of growing up. Lets face it he is just getting acquainted with his lifelong best friend.

Littlenellie Sun 29-Jul-12 17:46:44

My little brother was always doing it,much to mums embarrassment,so she told him if he didn't stop playing with it it would grow as big as a tree trunk...tree trunks then became the code word whenever he assumed a glazed expression and his hand wandered and mum was letting him know it wasn't the time or 55 he still is fond of rearranging his furniture and tree trunks are still laughed about...although he would kill me if he know he was the subject of a post on here....and he never had a dummy or comforter.

susiecb Mon 30-Jul-12 04:20:54

My nephew a lovely lttle boy used to do it and suck his thumb at the same time when he was sleepy my sister was forever telling him about it - he stopped all on his own at about 6 I think.

Mishap Mon 30-Jul-12 18:11:17

Little boys eh?!
I think he should not be given the impression that it is "not nice" - the end of his arms just happen to finish up there and he has a jolly little thing there to get to know that we don't have - best ignored and a bit of distraction.

My SIL told his son that it was fine to do it "but we just don't do it in public" - I thought that was a very helpful response.

My GSs have very different responses to the big willy scenario - one says "Its' gone big again - I don't like it" and another is hugely proud of it "Hey - look at this!" - best to just go with the flow I think - it's all part of being a little boy.

Nonu Mon 30-Jul-12 18:37:44

I think one of the most amusing things I have ever heard is my DGD saying to her mum , he , whoever he , was has a hanging down bottom , she then remarked later to her mum , oh , all boys have hanging down bottoms . You really couldn"t make up .

gracesmum Mon 30-Jul-12 21:17:04

I often think it wold have been so much easier if nature hadn't made their arms quite as long - at least not until later!!! grin

Littlenellie Tue 31-Jul-12 08:44:28

Perhaps this thread should have been on the one entitled children's top toys [grin\
But it isn't only little boys,but little girls also,I had to take my DD to the doctors at the age of about 10 with a sore Minnie she had been investigating over zealously and needed some cream and a little " chat" ...when younger she used to pull fluff off anything woolly and could be found stroking herself withit....

Greatnan Tue 31-Jul-12 09:09:01

Nellie, the sad thing was that there was a group of professionals who didn't seem to realise that many children shove objects in their orifices and parents were charged with sexual abuse. Many children were taken from their homes, not even allowed a favourite teddy, and later adopted without their parents' consent.
I think children are sexual beings from birth - they just learn to hide it because adults won't face facts and make them feel guilty and dirty. Of course, they have to be taught not to masturbate in public, but it can be done gently.

Littlenellie Tue 31-Jul-12 16:19:10

Yes I remember that greatnan and fortunately we where not subjected to that but did worry about the doctor being suspicious about a child's curiosity
Same as when E developed a urine infection when she first started school,she wasn't drinking enough during the day,and obviously this resulted in her being sore and her urine much stronger,but this GP sent us quite rightly for a scan and kidney checks but again I did feel worried in case anything untoward was suspected....a worry both is natural for children to explore their bodies and I have either distracted,or when older said that it is perfectly ok to do so but in private is the best place.

Faye Tue 31-Jul-12 21:45:28

Nonu it is amusing what little girls say about little boys. GD was in the room with her friend while I changed her cousin's nappy. She looked over at him and said with disdain. "Oh, look at him, he has a big belly button."

jeni Tue 31-Jul-12 22:05:38

I remember my DS and dd sitting on the step outside next doors window with their dd's while next doors mum was sitting sewing.obviously all of us had no nudity taboo!
Next doors dd ' my daddy's got a big one'
My DS' my daddy's is better!'
Next doors dd ' Js is only tiny'. j is my son
DS, very indignantly! ' it'll grow! I still think my daddy's is bigger'

At this point my neighbour decided to split this conversation up, before the children had tha fathers lined up with measuring tapes!

This was neighbours on the other side who are both now dead!

gracesmum Wed 01-Aug-12 17:01:43

Couldl have been talking about their cars wink

JessM Wed 01-Aug-12 17:35:00

My GD very interested in "bits" - possibly bathing with little brother is an influence.
Picture of a Titian nude in the Economist caught her eye.
Nana, why is that lady touching her foo-foo?
Another cue to continue my lecture on art and the classical ideal that was started in Sydey art gallery ... "She is hiding it, not touching it... boobies were not considered rude in art in olden times but other bits were.... etc etc etc

yogagran Wed 01-Aug-12 23:36:16

My DS was asking about the physical difference between his younger sister and himself one day when they were in the bath. After my explanation he said "she's the same as me then - just inside out" hmm

Nonu Thu 02-Aug-12 11:30:20

Oh Faye , aren"t they adorable smile .Don"t know about u but can"t stop laughing , not to their face of course

absentgrana Thu 02-Aug-12 11:37:15

Many years ago I was asked to baby sit a little girl and her boy cousin who was staying with the family. I popped them both in the bath in preparation for bedtime, when the little boy said he needed the loo. I lifted him out and he duly had a pee with his girl cousin watching with interest. As I lifted him back into the bath, she said, "That's a handy little gadget."

dorsetpennt Thu 02-Aug-12 11:43:50

They all do it - little boys and men - always checking their bits, even in public, maybe worried it's going to drop off or disappear. As someone on this thread said, ignore or distract but never say thats nasty or dirty. We don't want any phobias on growing up. I wonder if that is how flashers get started, by seeing someone's horrified expression when a small boy and they enjoyed it.

whenim64 Thu 02-Aug-12 12:14:00

I've heard a few indecent exposers explain what triggered their behaviour, and many described a feeling of power when growing up amidst a background of neglect, humiliation and/or violence. Some have spoken about rejection by peers which they addressed by acting out to get attention. It's complex - some will never exhibit themselves in public, but do it in the home, others do it from a distance and run away, and yet others are confrontational and will escalate to physically harming someone.

Boys and men doing absent minded rearrangments and jiggling are harmless. It's a boy thing!