Almost a Grandma but not really

No-one was around the other day, so it was just a pleasant stroll with Beth, but Harmony (Mony) ensured she didn’t miss yesterday. She took her bike, then decided it was a nuisance after all, so she asked one of our new found friends, Margaret, owner of a three legged dog called Bella, if she could leave her bike in her yard for a while. Beth and Bella socialised a bit, then we went walking. Talking about school, she mentioned to me that boys at school (remember she is one of 5 girls, no brothers) have something different ‘down there’. I said yes, it’s called a penis. Luckily John came by with his dog, ready to feed the horses – phew – saved before more questions. I’ll have to have a quiet word with her Mum….
My physiotherapist says I have to take it steady on the walks, so I resist the urge to try to keep up with Beth and Mony. I do love the walks though, and so does Beth, who decided to be true to her water dog nature the other day, and shot off to wallow in a rather dirty pond at the end of the storm drain. I’ve no sense of smell myself, but I was reliably informed that she ponged when we got home.
As we say in Yorkshire, there’s allus summat.

What a lovely relationship Joan; she is a lucky little girl.

We’ve been going on our usual walks, but sometimes I feel like the Pied Piper because other children sometimes join us: Harmony’s friend Sonia, also 6, and some new kids including a little lad aged 7 who have moved into the neighbourhood, his Mum and sister, plus Jane and dogs. Yesterday, however, I went alone: The new kids had just started their new school – same one as Harmony: Harmony had to go to the dentist, Jane was working…it was very nice, having a quiet walk for a change. Today was the usual: me, Harmony and Beth, as it is Sonia’s ballet evening.

John’s dog Xena was still on heat when a neighbourhood dog, notorious for escaping his garden, managed to get to Xena and do the deed. The new family saw it all, and saw that copulation was completed – Xena is probably pregnant. They told John all about it a few days ago, while we were all with the horses. John was ropeable, Harmony was all ears. So much was said, that her questions on the way home could only be answered honestly, so I ended up explaining canine reproduction to her. I did warn her Dad about the lesson I’d had to give – no doubt more questions followed when she got home.

Meanwhile I have to take it steady on the walks; I’m having physiotherapy for my back and painful tendon damage to my right thigh, and have been told to keep my walks down to 20 minutes. Well, not a chance of that – it is usually 30 to 40 minutes - but I ensure we just stroll rather than stride along.

Yesterday we had a bit of a rain storm, so no walk that day. Today it is sunny and windy, so off we went, Harmony Beth and me. The rain had made huge mud puddles on the path, so Harmony ( in her rainbow wellies) and Beth were soon having a lovely time splashing in the mud and water. Soon I joined in: after all, I had my own wellies on. How many years is it since I splashed in the mud and water?? The we crossed the little weir in the stream and had a look in the pigsty, then Harmony crossed back, but Beth and I found a dryer way out, climbing through a fence.

Later we joined old John and the 4 horses and his dog Xena. The horses were pretty frisky, but soon settled down when the feed arrived. Harmony distributed the hay for them for later, then Xena, still on heat, took a huge interest on Beth again, in spite of the fact she’s a female. This time Xena tried to mount Beth, with the result that Beth was most put out, so I took her out of the paddock, much to her relief.

When we left, Harmony had a look at the cat’s body in the drain again. The water hadn’t washed it away, but it is changing as decomposition takes place. She is a little sad about the cat having died, but this seems to be overshadowed by her interest in the process.

Then back home to sort out my compost for using as a seed raising medium. Phew – aches and pains all over.

Today a very quiet Harmony ran towards me and gave me a hug before the walk. She was sad ‘cos her Mum had received a letter that upset her. We had a nice walk though, and then she went to help John with the horses. Carol, the owner of 2 of the 4 horses is away till Sept 12th, so John has to do all the feeding and tick control. Harmony, Beth the dog and I went into the horse paddock with John and his dog Xena. Trouble is, Xena’s on heat, and a small black dog from the farm at the far end of the paddock ran up to her and tried to mount her. John and I yelled at the dog, it ran away but kept coming back, so I went out of the paddock with Beth and Xena, to avoid Xena getting pregnant. Harmony watched all of it, and the questions followed when we went home. Turns out she knew quite a lot about canine reproduction anyway – phew!

She is still interested in the dead cat – it is still at the bottom of the drain. I hope rats don’t get it.

The mini motorbike rider and the dead cat featured in today’s walk. Harmony’s little friend came along too, but my friend Jane wasn’t home so the three of us plus Beth set off. The two little girls were fascinated by a dead cat lying at the bottom of a drain. They wondered how it got there, as the metal slats were too narrow. I explained it must have been washed down into the drain from the nearby open storm drain. It was a small tortoiseshell cat with a studded collar – no doubt a missing pet. I’ll watch out for lost cat notices. Meanwhile Harmony has decided to look at it every day, after I explained the decay process to her. She’s looking forward to it being a skeleton, but I suspect the body will be washed away again.

As for the mini motorbike – a young lad was on our walk area with his Dad, and was riding his motorbike up and down a steep pile of gravel, which had solidified over time. Harmony wanted to try it on her bike. I said No, then joked that if I took her home with a broken neck her Mum would bash me up. Harmony looked at me in all seriousness and said she wouldn’t let Mum do that, but if Mum did, she would ring the police and dob in her Mum!! I think she was relieved that I wouldn’t let her try it.

The thing about six year olds is that they know everything!

Oops – nearly forgot another funny. Harmony has lost a front baby tooth. Then last week I lost a front tooth off my plate, and I had to go around with a tooth missing until yesterday when I got it fixed. Harmony was fascinated with my second lost tooth (I lost the other front tooth and had it replaced a while back). She asked me if it bled when it fell out! I said no – didn’t want to elaborate on false teeth though as she would have insisted on my taking them out for her to see how they worked!

Then we went on a walk, just the two of us and Beth the dog, as her little friend was at ballet class. She wanted to have an ‘adventure’ ducking under a fence and crossing a stream. When we came to cross back further down it was muddy but she managed to get across. I got stuck in the mud though and had to pull my foot out of my wellie boot and pull myself up the bank, dragging my boot behind me. She thought it was hilarious! I felt my age.

Things have been carrying on as normal – walks and gardening. Another 6 year old and her single Mum have moved in nearby and they both came with me on the walk, with their bikes. Jane now works split shifts and is only here for our walks at the weekend. The weather has been very rainy, which is good for the garden but bad for our walks, of course.
Last week both girls brought their bikes and we took a different route, mainly on roads. I found it impossible to cope with looking after them both, making sure they were safe, looking after the dog, so the next day I said: “no bikes – it is too much for me”. Harmony sulked and refused to come, the other little lass wanted to leave her bike, so they had an argument. In the end I told them we were forgetting the walk, and I went home. All was well the next day, when I went to her sister’s 21st birthday party next door. But the rain is back, with a vengeance.

This little altercation happened this morning between H and her Mum:

Harmony comes out wearing a summer dress..

Mum: Ohh honey its too cold to be wearing that get something warm on

H: But I love this dress

Mum: I know but its too cold go get something warm on please

H: Storms off

H: *Comes bk in something warmer stomping her feet*

Mum: Thats better

H:* Starts ranting hands on hips* You know what its like I dont even have a life*throws her hands in the air* its like you run my life and I can't even pick my clothes out cause its like I dont even have a life its like my life is yours life and you don't even let me live my life!! 

Mum: *Giggling on the inside*Well im your mum and I have to look after you

H: Stomps off downstairs shouting Well you still don't have to live my life!!
Mum:
Omgosh what have we created and shes only 6 ... Hehhehehe

Maybe it’s as well the weather has prevented a walk today!!!

I don't get to see my GS at the moment but I have had and continue to have other children in my life. I looked after neighbours children when I was a girl and now see neighbours and friends children often so I think all children are given to us, even a smile from a child out shopping etc can lighten our hearts and lift our spirits.

I hope you do the books Joan, it would be great for you to get your name in print and read your books to Harmony. It's on my "50 things to do in my 50's" list, try to get something published. I have an idea too but it's how to go about it.

I am enjoying the posts because they do have a flavour of Australia and make me think that I can't really wait until next year to visit again!

Hope Harmony is recovering now. I think the tales of your interesting walks would perhaps make a lovely illustrated book ?

It really is a lovely story of your relationship with Harmony. At the moment I feel that you are treated better by her than some grandmothers are treated by their real grandchildren. I have two GDs one is lovely - could be another Harmony but the other! She's naughty and cheeky and when I am there she gets jealous of my relationship to her mother who she idealises.

I go home trying not to dislike her and hope that the next visit will be better.

You and Harmony have chosen each other, there is a difference.

Joan, the little girl will always remember you and all the things you have taught her. I think you will have been an inspiration to her.

I agree, it's delightful.
I've read it all this morning, it would make a lovely little book.

Joan; why have I missed this delightful thread till now ? I can't help but feel that there's a book in this, even if it's only a little journal to write and give to Harmony when she's older. There's something quite magical about your friendship.

No walk for Harmony today - she had fallen off her bike and had some big red grazes. No tears - just a sad look on her face. So Jane and I walked the dogs without her, while she stayed with her Mum. At least we were able to discuss our children's books idea in peace: I will write them, Jane will illustrate them, and Harmony will test them. All I need now is inspiration to get started......I do have some ideas though.

Joan I am really enjoying reading about the development of your relationship with Harmony. For a short while when I was seven I had an older couple in my life who spent time with me and I remember how special it felt to know that they were with me because they wanted to be. Harmony is very fortunate to have you in her life, but I can also sense the richness she adds to yours; it's a very special relationship and quite heartwarming to read about.

Rosequartz this is a city suburb, but very different from any suburb I've ever known. It is within a triangle of two main roads and a railway line; a former mining settlement, though the mines are all closed now. It is quite rural in character.

Harmony now has a regular ride on a Saturday morning on Beauty, the 27 year old mare. John and the other horse owner, Carol, are slowly teaching her about looking after horses, their needs and problems. She is learning a lot, though I don't think she thinks of it as learning. She noticed that Titan, the pushy one, is a stallion with rather a large penis. She just pointed at it and told me that was how she knew he was male. I told her he probably has a lot of testosterone, which explains his naughtiness and mild aggression. She asked me all about testosterone, so I told her. I can just imagine her accusing her Dad of having too much testosterone next time he gets cross!

Now she brings her bike on our walks - she is just like I was with my first bike - she rides it everywhere. Mind you, I was 11, not just turned 6.

I'm getting back into digital photography again, and will take photos on our walk shortly, so that I can post them on my page.

What wonderful stories! I used to follow our school caretaker around (we lived in the school house) and bore him to death with our family doings - well he certainly learned a lot about our family from me I'm sure. He used to give me wonderful birthday and Christmas presents. It would be allowed today though. Nothing untoward happened and my family kept in touch with him for years.

When I was in my teens I palled up with an elderly lady across the road who used to help me sort out my love life. She had no children of her own and was a super listener.

Your little friend will, I'm sure, remember you forever with great affection

I am still laughing at the youtube link!!

My Australian GS is the same age, so I am enjoying these tales of Harmony as I can relate to him and the animals he sees on a daily basis. Not so many people seem to have 'chooks' here, but they do, so he and I would go to feed them together sometimes and collect the eggs.

Life seems different over there than in the UK, although I suppose if you live in a city or city suburb it is probably much the same anywhere.

Joan What wonderful stories about you and your little friend. They have brought tears to my eyes reading them. You are right about it taking a village to bring up a child. It seems that Harmony is bringing all of you together and uniting the community, what a fantastic thing to be happening. When I was little, and probably in most of us our ages, we all played out in the streets and if someone was naughty then any adult around would tell us off. None of this "you don't say that to my child" went on, we all just mucked in and brought each other up. I loved that time and wouldn't change the memories for anything.

The incident with the vibrator, it reminded me of when my DD's then boyfriend jumped onto my bed when they'd both come in to talk to me, and we heard a buzzing sound coming from my bedside drawers. Luckily we all cracked up laughing.

You are very lucky though to have the opportunity to share your time, wisdom and your knowledge with Harmony, who seems to lap up all that you are teaching her. I don't get to see my GC very often, but I have had other children in my life who I have had the chance to teach and play with. Even as a young child I looked after neighbours babies and enjoyed every minute. Nothing is more precious than giving time to someone. Harmony is a very lucky little girl to have found you.

Yesterday's walk marked another stage in our relationship - she showed us her worst behaviour; the stuff usually reserved for family. Beth had found a discarded dog toy on our walk; a small stuffed toy in the shape of a football. She happily carried it in her mouth, but Harmony wanted to play with it and tried to get it off her. Well, Retrievers have very strong jaws, and she wouldn't let go. I told Harmony not to be cruel - Beth loved the ball. Then Harmony put on one of the acts I knew she did at home, but never before with me and Jane. Furious expression, arms rigidly at her side, she strode off ahead of us, then roared in fury. Jane and I just carried on our walk as if nothing at happened. Harmony stayed ahead of us, crossed the stream by the little bridge, and tried to cross back further down, where it was muddy. Her little rainbow coloured wellie boots got stuck, and the mud nearly reached the top. A contrite little girl asked for my help, and of course I rescued her, getting muddy myself. She was good for the rest of the time!

Jane has never had kids, and was totally flummoxed by the whole thing.

And then this hilarious American ad turned up on another forum:

www.youtube.com/embed/qKHeXC7L85s?rel=0

Harmony decided to do a bit of 'clean up Australia' the other day, and crossed the road to fish things out of the pond at the end of the creek, opposite Jane's place, while I went to the loo and Jane kept watch on her. She fished something out and came back, while Jane and I got a drink of port. Harmony showed what she'd found - a rather large vibrator!! Before we could say anything, Harmony said she didn't know what it was, but suspected it was something she shouldn't play with - like matches and lighters. We both heartily agreed and told her to put it in the bin and wash her hands. She obeyed without question. Phew. I told Jane I thought at first Harmony had got it out of Jane's bedroom, which started another bout of laughing - but she had got it out of the pond of course. We couldn't stop laughing though, and needed another port, and then another, while Harmony happily drank her cordial and played with the dogs. I ended up going home half an hour late - ie 5.30pm instead of 5pm, and Terry was ropeable, I didn't care - I was still laughing!!!

We’ve been continuing our walks – three humans and three dogs all this time, apart from when we were out or the weather was bad. Meanwhile Harmony turned 6 on June 30th. I remember when she was born – I took round a little present when they came home from hospital, and cuddled her a while. But we were just ordinary friendly neighbours for years until Harmony decided to ‘adopt’ me. Now I know her parents a little bit better, and know many more people in the neighbourhood. Kids and dogs are great ice breakers aren’t they?

Harmony and her Mum and sisters all went to see Disney on Ice for her birthday. She wore a Snow White dress, and had a wonderful time. She got a bike without training wheels as her main present, and by the end of the day had learned to ride it. Jane and I did things for her birthday: Jane made a card with a collage of pictures taken on our walks, ‘paper engineering’ inside, of a beach ball with more pictures hidden inside, which opened up as you opened her card. She’s an artist and very good at these things, plus glass work and sculpture and painting…. She used to teach art at a school. I gave Harmony some children’s garden tools, two pairs of gardening gloves, and a card with a poem inside which I wrote:

HARMONY’S BIRTHDAY

There’s a girl who lives nearby
Who’s turning 6 today
She loves to take the dogs for walks
And run and climb and play.

But today’s a special treat
To see a Disney show,
Harmony’s the birthday girl
Who just can’t wait to go

But later on it’s time to walk
Just like she does each day
With Joan and Jane and all three dogs
They’ll soon be on their way.

The dogs are Oommee, Maggs and Beth,
Then there’s John’s cockatoo,
And further on the horses wait,
For their rendez vous.

There’s Beauty, Archie, big black Mack
And naughty Titan too,
He likes to check their pockets out
For something nice to chew.

Along the stream just by the bridge
Two pigs are resting there,
There’s Babe and little Smellie too
A truly happy pair.

And further up some geese patrol,
And turkeys, chickens too,
But now it’s time to turn for home
Because the walk is through.

The walk is through, it’s truth to say,
But they’ll be back another day.

On our walks, while I collect weeds for the chickens, we teach Harmony number skills – adding up and finding number patterns. We also teach her whatever comes along: they say it takes a village to raise a child – well this child is lucky ‘cos we’re her village.

Not sure what will happen this afternoon – you never know. Soon Jane will start building her hen pen, so no doubt we’ll all be involved!