Hi All , Re the most difficult journey of my life so far ... It is finally coming to an end it seems 
The department have said YES to me having my GS!!
I am still in shock as they said NO before which absolutelty THREW me as I thought I was on solid ground but then it felt like I was wading in mud again!
They fully agreed this time and I think it is because the 'trial run' when I had him for the 6 days went so well and they do want my GS to be HAPPY and the SW said she knows I am going to be brilliant at it
She said no Grandparent EXPECTS this ie taking on the full time care of their Grandchild but that I have adjusted to the reality and practicalities of it and we are still going for full guardianship as my DD is not doing very well unfortunately and we suspect there may be drugs involved as well
It has to go 'higher' now for all the final agreements and arrangements , the foster agency has to be made known and the school , plus the special needs team who deal with my GS as he will be living in another borough , contact centre for DD will need to be changed to a closer one etc but SW sees it as being no problem now it has been agreed
The RELIEF is IMMENSE and I cried after the phone call like a baby
My little GS is finally going to be HAPPY after all he has been through
It is going to take 2-4 weeks now but that is fine , we are NEARLY THERE NOW and I feel bad for losing faith as my personal belief is Gods power is ABOVE mans and it certainly is , but is has been SCARY , baffling and overwhelming at times which is natural too
I was at the point I had had ENOUGH of it all , not giving up , but had ENOUGH but now I can concentrate on the REAL prep work as the house and garden are DONE so I just need to get MY SUPPORT NETWORK well and truly in place , find out what is in the community etc , get the carers centre on board as they are brilliant and experts on all things to do with carers and plus give my GS an EXTRA tight hug when I see him next with a huge smile on my face!!!
nannynoo and no wonder! You've put a great big on my face. Well done for staying the course.
I'm not surprised, how wonderful. It's taken ages, I know, but I am very happy for you both.
I feel SO HAPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE xx
So pleased for you nannynoo! It will be so much better for your little DGS to be living with someone who cares so much about him. Your strength and perseverance has been amazing. 
Fantastic news nannynoo Well done, you've worked really hard for this outcome and you and your dgs deserve a happy, settled life 
Whoopee! 
Brilliant news nannymoo, I'm sitting here with a silly great grin on my face!
You must be weak with relief and shock, well done you!! 
chocolate [cupcakes] and 
((Hugs)) x
You guys have been BRILLIANT and SO supportiv4 , thank you all so much
I don't know what I would have done without you , it's so lovely to have this safe haven to come to and offload and it has REALLY helped me on my journey so thank you ALL SO MUCH
Have been crying on and off all day , but in a different way than before , am still in SHOCK though but it's VERY GOOD 'shock' indeed! xx
One day maybe my GS will know that I was working behind the scenes doing my absolute best to get him here with me and it's NOT that I didn't want him to be here as I VERY much did!! x
It will be SO LOVELY to put it all behind us though
Wonderful news nannynoo I am so pleased for you both.
Wonderful news Nannynoo. That arrangement is going to be just what your DGS needs. All power to you.
All the best over the next few weeks while it all gets sorted, nannynoo
Yes she said I have to find a solicitor now and they will pay for it
He will be attending the same school for a while so will be paying for a cab plus giving me an allowance
The contact centre will change to a closer one and will be nice to attend as the CARER and just drop him off and pick him up without being in the middle of it lol
I feel 'freer' now just to simply care for my GS
We do need to get a legal order in place for his safety and security and if there is significant improvement with my DD in the future then she can take it to court , same with contact if she is in a place for it to be upped but it also gives the option of limiting contact if it becomes disruptive or harmful etc and it is actually good for her to know if she is disruptive on visits that it can go to court to be changed / limited and that may actually help her with her behaviour etc rather than think it is a free for all or can get out of control as there HAS to be control for my GS's sake plus he needs a nice , calm carer looking after him not a stressed out one so there has to be 'complete' safety measures in place at all times for him and me to be honest!
That is so good. Well done nannynoo.
nannynoo well done for all your patience and hard work- its will lovely for you and GS.
There have been sleepless nights , many tears , IMMENSE stress , worry , pain , more pain , more worry , more sleepless nights and in it all I just kept plodding on , step by step dealing with EVERY emotion which came along re SS , the foster carer difficulties , my DD's problems and eratic nature of her illness , being given him for the 6 GLORIOUS days followed by the then heightened pain of separation again for BOTH of us , so feeling my GS's pain too , the not understanding the whole process SS wise but hoping something could be done .... oooo just realised no more contact centre visits for ME as such as being there with my GS for the short 2 hours but being WATCHED and everything I said noted was STILL difficult as have NEVER been in that situation before and it is hard to relax 100% then and fully ENJOY HIM 100% which I can do at home
It has basically been an emotional roller coaster but I have grown so much and become stronger in so many ways , yet will be so good to put this all BEHIND me as they were dark days in many ways 
and I would like to FORGET them when I have the JOY again in my life
I cannot even describe how difficult it all was but it shows even pigeon steps forward are indeed steps forward and all those steps ADD UP!!!
Just make sure they get that SGO support plan in place! And make sure they pay for your legal representation!
[dontletthemoffthehoo
I'm so pleased for you, nannynoo - you and your DGS deserve this!
Oh Nannynoo that is such fabulous news. I am really pleased for you. It's taken so long and you've had such terrible ups and downs and now you'll be getting the best reward ever.
All the very best for the future with your dear GS .
And let's dare hope that your DD might be able to pull herself out of her dreadful abyss. I really do hope so, for all your sakes.
Nannynoo you are a wonderful example of perseverance in the face of many difficulties, to us all. Well done!
I am so pleased that at last your DGS will be with you and you can give him all the love and security that he needs. He will surely thrive with you. Give yourself a big pat of the back! and even
Nannynoo, what wonderful news. Thanks so much for telling us all so quickly. I am so pleased for you and your grandson. The fact the department is going for Special Guardianship is excellent because it gives you and your grandson the support you'll need. I'm sorry to hear your daughter isn't doing so well but it sounds as though you are beginning to be able to give yourself a break emotionally from caring for her.
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