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An update on Grandson :-)

(21 Posts)
nannynoo Wed 30-Sep-15 22:08:15

Hi All , many of you have followed my previous posts and I haven't been on here for a while as understandably a busy bee nowadays!

My Grandson has settled in SO well , we have a lovely routine and often he says ''stay at Nannys house'' smile

He is sleeping in his own bed every night ( when he first came here he was clingy and a bit insecure so I let him sleep in with me most of the time ) but he loves his room and bed etc and is in bed at 7pm every night and asleep by 7.30pm!

He is loving school and is much less clingy when I drop him off ... the journey dropping him off has been a problem though as a 4 hour a day journey in the back of a cab meant I started suffering with back pain which has been getting worse by the day so I spoke to the SW and she has arranged for an escort to be found so I am waiting to hear on that once the transport dept get a bid for the journey / someone willing to do the job as we were getting a different cab driver ever day as no-one wanted to do the 24 mile round trip twice a day!! So I hope they do find someone soon from the new company who provide escorts too as I NEED my back to be able to care for my GS

He is doing so well emotionally too as I encourage him to get his feeling out even with his limited speech and sometimes he says ''Mummy not well'' and ''bye bye Mummy not well'' which is what he says when he doesn't want that to happen or be the case sad

He does miss his Mum and at other times he does not want to go to contact especially if she has cancelled one or two times in a row which has happened recently and she is NOT doing well at all! sad sad

So we plod on and deal with our emotions , the both of us lol and he also goes from missing the foster carer and asking to see her to freaking out if her name is mentioned and saying ''stay with Nanny , stay with Nanny'' so obviously he has mixed emotions but both feelings are fine and natural , it is natural for him to miss the foster carer yet not want to live with her and it is natural for him to miss his Mum and to one day live with her as he says ''Mummys house one day'' sad

He is doing so well at school and everyone has noticed he is so much happier than before and his 'behaviours' are becoming less and less as he is healing smile

So he is coming on leaps and bounds and I have things like a reward chart for good behaviour and we do about 5-10 mins of phonics work each night to help with his reading and we have been to a local farmers market on a Saturday morning which he loved and asked to go back and a Sunday afternoon boot fair where he found some bargain toys and loved it too!

I can't wait to get more energy though when the school escort is sorted as I don't get much time during the day to do stuff before the afternoon cab is back at my door , basically I get about 3 hours per day to myself whereas the other parents / carers get 7!!! ... I could do A LOT with 7 hours but now I do the basics eg cook a big dinner to freeze some too plus try and rest my back and then that's it for the day and am too tired to do anything after school eg go to the park which we sometimes used to do before but at least I am ENJOYING him to the MAX

And on a completely soppy , heart melting note I was putting him to bed the other night when he gave me lots of kisses then gazed deep into my eyes and said ''GOOD NANNY'' .... to say my heart melted would be an understatement , he is SO precious! sunshine

ninathenana Wed 30-Sep-15 22:19:41

Oh nannynoo that's wonder. I am so pleased for both of you.
Your last paragraph brought a tear to my eye.

TriciaF Wed 30-Sep-15 22:20:20

How lovely - Bless him!
I'm puzzled, though, why he has to do 4 journeys a day to school? Can't be good for either of you.

durhamjen Wed 30-Sep-15 22:24:01

I think she means she does four. He only does two. Is that right?

Ana Wed 30-Sep-15 22:24:26

Lovely to have an update from you, nannynoo, and I'm glad your DGS has settled in so well. smile

What a journey to and from his school though - I hadn't realised you lived so far away. It must be difficult, hope you get some help with that aspect soon but you're obviously coping brilliantly and so is your DGS. Well done!

merlotgran Wed 30-Sep-15 22:25:33

Such a lovely OP, nannynoo. You certainly deserve your grandson's love and he deserves to be loved so much.

Please take care of yourself as well. smile

LullyDully Wed 30-Sep-15 22:35:13

You are doing a very good job. You should feel proud. How good that your GS can be looked after by family who love him.

You can give him stability . The worst thing for a child with autism is change and you can prevent stress in his world.

Take care and I hope you also get the support you will need.

nannynoo Wed 30-Sep-15 22:50:18

Ahhh thank you so much everyone , was thinking the other day he is thriving and I want to thrive too so BOTH of us are smile

And that means me taking care of myself too! ... So once this journey thing is sorted I will have more time for me thankfully and yes I do 4 x 1hr journeys per day and my GS does 2

I think at the next meeting we will discuss a school in my area , it will have to happen at some point as this is going to be long term not short term

It is sad what is going on with his Mum but only she can make the decision to get help / change things

I am so glad my GS is healing and me alongside him too and am feeling much more positive about things now and the school and SW's and assessment lady etc are all on board so I feel supported smile

I still do remember the AWFUL days in my previous posts when I couldn't sleep and did much much crying , it really was an awful time to heal from etc and am so glad we are both moving on so quickly from the hurt of the past etc and are really enjoying each other and each new day! sunshine xx

nannynoo Wed 30-Sep-15 22:52:20

On a different note I HATE leaving my dog for 4 hours a day too and I might as well have a part time job!!! confused x

rosequartz Wed 30-Sep-15 22:54:16

Lovely to read the update and I am glad he is doing well.
You both seem happy and becoming settled; I hope you get all the support you need and he continues to progress.
Look after yourself

gillybob Thu 01-Oct-15 10:38:51

Lovely to have such a happy progress report nannynoo. Your DGS is so lucky to have such a loving, caring "nanny" as you. I don't know how you do those school runs everyday, you must be exhausted. I used to do something similar before we moved house but thankfully only once or twice a week. I think moving to a school nearer you has to be a priority if this is going to be a long term thing. This would give you more time to relax together. you must both be worn out. flowers to you. x

Iam64 Thu 01-Oct-15 15:56:13

Thanks for this happy update. Is there a plan for him to transfer to a school nearer to you, maybe in the new year ?

rosesarered Thu 01-Oct-15 17:30:51

Wonderful for you nannynoo. our autistic grandson has a taxi driver and an escort, an hour there and an hour back again,SS should find one for you.Keep telling them it's having an effect on your back.What a good outcome, and it will get better as he settles with you.Good

rosesarered Thu 01-Oct-15 17:32:38

The trouble us, there are not many of this type of school and you have to accept what you can.However, a two hour journey is not good for any child.

shysal Thu 01-Oct-15 17:36:12

Thanks for the update, so glad it is going well. Hope you get rest for your back soon. Look after yourself. flowers

MiniMouse Thu 01-Oct-15 18:27:28

What a lovely, positive update. Your life sounds exhausting though! A nearer school sounds as though it should be a high priority on SS's 'to do' list. Fingers crossed they come up with a solution soon smile

Deedaa Thu 01-Oct-15 20:32:13

So glad things are going so well for you both. Hope you will be able to find a school that's closer, it sounds a very tiring day for a little boy and he needs you fit and well too.

Judthepud2 Thu 01-Oct-15 20:55:00

Thank you so much for posting an update Nannynoo. So glad things are settling down for your little DGS although it sounds exhausting for you. Hope you can get the school journey problem sorted soon. You are an amazingly brave lady and your GS is lucky to have you!

Meercat Thu 01-Oct-15 21:53:30

So lovely to hear that things are going well. Four hours travelling time is a long time for both of you though. No wonder you are tired and no wonder your back is hurting

It is important to take care of yourself as well as you are taking care of your lovely grandson.

You both deserve to be happy and wellflowers

Iam64 Fri 02-Oct-15 08:45:53

Yes roses is right about the relative scarcity of the type of school needed and of course this little boy needed the stability of school to aid his settling in with nanny but I hope a similar lar school nearer home can be identified at the right time. The journey is so demanding of him and his nanny

Anya Fri 02-Oct-15 09:53:34

I'm really pleased to hear all your good news nannynoo. I didn't post on your other threads, except to say there was good advice being offered, but I did follow your story with interest. You are doing such a great job.

I hope an escort can be arranged as it's a huge chunk out of your day, apart from your back problem. It must be hard for him too, the long journeys at the beginning and end of his day.

I admire you for your tenacity and the way you've let nothing overwhelm you.

Thank you so much for the update X