Tracy get all the help you can, so yes to the McKenzie friend, but a lawyer would be money well spent. I didn't have a lawyer and didn't get permission to go to the main court to request the visitation order, I went to court 3 times, first; they didn't show, second; they contested, third; it was thrown out. I had a very special bond with my GD, as she lived with me before nasty came into the picture, I chose my GD name and her second & last name were mine, my only names, my GD stepdad even changed her name! But I still didn't get the permission needed to go to the main court to request the visitation order! I think the judge was a childless women, no empathy what-so-ever, she believed all the lies and deceit!
The deceitful, lying, manipulative people are the ones that win in court, the quiet, good folk don't! It all hinges on the Judge, I had three, the first two were very sympathetic, the first one phoned them, all their numbers, when they didn't show up for the hearing; no answers, she then sent a bailiff round with a summons for the next hearing. At the next hearing nasty s.i.l said he didn't know about the court case, but I pointed out he did, as it was on court recorders, that he phoned the courts before hand and asked if he needed to be there! If I'd have had the first two Judges, I think it would have gone through.
I would still advise not going to court, it will enflame the situation even more, your d.i.l will then be in a fight with you and her being the child's mother, she will win. If you did get the visitation order, she will sabotage it; ^ he's sick, he's on a school outing, he doesn't want to come^ You would than have to go back to court and start all over again. If I could turn the clock back I wouldn't go down that road, all the bridges are now burnt and I haven't seen my precious GC&D in 3.5yrs!
I think the only way is to win her over. Good luck