Dummies

I too was a dummy snob, DS1 was a difficult baby and cried a lot. I was desperate enough to give him a dummy. He spat it straight out and I was relieved. With DS2 I I gave him a dummy. When he spat it out I put it back in a held it fir a few moments for him to get the idea. I enjoyed his babyhood more, and he got a lot if comfort.
Do you remember a few years ago there was a brief fashion for teenage girls to have a dummy in their mouth as a fashion accessory. How horrid!

Missdeke. , we once had a toddler come to our school with a bottle. He could only have been 12 - 18 months. The bottle contained Coca Cola.

My own children declined to have dummies, but the first sucked his thumb and that has proved a very hard habit to break. My 21 month old granddaughter has found a dummy very soothing and still has it when she's tired. It has in no way impeded her speech development which is coming along extremely well.
I agree with those who say that dummy (pacifier is a much nicer word) can be thrown away but not so a thumb! My husband, who is a dental surgeon does not disagree!

All 4 of mine had dummies, only for sleep time though, and they gave them up at varying ages up to age 2. Far worse than dummies with toddlers, is the bottle hanging out of their mouths as they go about their daily business, especially with tea or coffee in it!!

I too was a dummy snob with a husband who was adamant that our children wouldn't have them. None of them did but we had a variety of thumb and finger suckers.

However, DGS2 had dreadful colic and was so much better when he had a dummy. End of dummy snobbery here!

In a school staffroom one break-time, when I was a supply teacher, I was astonished to see a young female teacher put her thumb in her mouth and twiddle her hair with the other hand!

Must add to my previous post that I am talking 50 years ago and dummies are better designed now, with probably low risk to teeth.

None of our family ever used dummies, I think I was about 10 years old before I saw a baby with one. When I asked my mother what it was she said it was what common people used to keep their children quiet.I never used them for my children, I had seen the damage to the dental arch of young children especially those that continued to use them when they were toddlers.

Young babies have a fundamental need to suck. Our lifestyles don't support having a baby constantly at the breast so a dummy or thumb is a substitute. All three of mine were breastfed and my older two also had dummies. Unfortunately, my 2nd child was so happy sucking the dummy she couldn't recognise the need for milk and slept quite contentedly! I had to wrench the dummy out of her mouth with a great plopping sound and rapidly push my nipple in its place as she rooted around trying to find it! She would suck a bit then cry for the dummy. This pull/push routine was repeated until my milk let down when she became expert at guzzling but then the dummy was required again. When my youngest came along, midwifery had moved on and he was put to the breast within minutes of being born. He wouldn't ever tolerate anything artificial in his mouth so never had a dummy or bottle. All three were lovely, placid babies and the older two gave up the dummy around 18 months/2years, when they could understand and agree that the current one was the last. They each, voluntarily put the final dummy in the bin from where they knew things never came out again. The youngest gave up the breast at about the same age.

So dummies can have drawbacks but so can thumb sucking. As a child, I had a friend whose sister sucked her thumb for years and it became rather shrivelled looking. That, and the slobber running up her arm, put me off encouraging my babies to suck thumb or fingers ? I don't think it looks any worse to see a toddler sucking a dummy than sucking their thumb and, as others have pointed out, the dummy is easier to give up.

I think dummies are fine but they should stay in the cot/bed not be used all day, especially by children old enough to talk! My first child sucked her thumb and that was difficult to stop. The others had a dummy and there was no problem getting rid of it. Once they were about 12 months old and when the dummy had worn out I got them to put it in the bin. When they asked for it I reminded them they had thrown it away and there was no problem.

I sucked my thumb until I was 18 when a boyfriend I later married expressed surprise. Up to then it gave me great comfort. My grandson has just been weened from his dummies he agreed to leave them in the woods for a mummy squirrel to take for her babies - sweet

My children never had a dummy, or my grandaughter think they look awful in child's mouth. Does no good to their teeth at all.

Whenever I see a dummy in a baby's mouth I think "there's a baby whose parents want it to shut up".

DD always took the view that if DGS was crying there was something bothering him and it was her job to put it right. She herself found her thumb when quite young, but that's self-soothing rather than an outside agency (parent) "putting a sock in it".

i think dummies can be good if used right a baby dummies should never go in any ones mouth or pick up from floor and put back in mouth and i agree toddlers should not have dummies or bottles

My DS was taken into the night nursery when he was 8 hours old as I was very ill and needed to rest properly (not my idea I hasten to add, the Dr insisted on it).
When I went to get him at 5-30 the next morning, he had a dummy in.....I was furious, they had no right to give him a dummy, which they knew was against my wishes!
Even that one night seemed to get him 'hooked' on a dummy, and it was the only thing that would get him to sleep, which I wasn't happy about, but gave in.
I made sure he had orthodontic dummies, recommended by our dentist, and were only used at sleep time.
When he was 7 months old I honestly couldn't find any of his dummies. They were always kept in their cases on top of the bread bin, but there was no sign of them. I think he sensed the true panic in my voice as I explained as well as I could that the 'dubs' were lost, and went to sleep quite happily without one.....phew!
I found them about an hour later, they'd slipped into the gap between the bread bin and the wall! I kept them hidden for a few weeks 'just in case' but we never needed one again!
I loathe seeing dummies in the mouths of toddlers walking about, and have even seen reception class children walking go school with a dummy in......that's just ridiculous!

Mine didn't have dummies because both Grans were screaming at me from day one how awful they were, and that I wasn't to use them. My DIL used them from day one and I felt really envious - an instant way to cheer up a cranky baby and sleep at night, good for her, wish I'd had the strength to tell the Grans where to get off! Aren't they know as 'pacifiers' the other side of the pond? Exactly!

Good for sleep deprived parents both mine had one gave them up aged 3 yrs but didn't have them outside I hate to see them when child is quite happy and playing my youngest was given one when 2days old by nurses she needed blood transfusion and it was only way to keep her still so good job I wasn't anti dummy I think thumb/finger sucking takes longer to drop but everyone to their own ?

Like you maddy47 I hate dummies. Two of my GH had them. My GS had one until recently. During the wedding of his parents, when he was 3 yrs old, he insisted on having it, consequently all the beautiful photos included him with it obscuring his face. His Father tried to take it away but he was having non of it. His Mum said it was better that he had it than him grizzling during the service. So I haven't put any photos of him in my album of wedding pics.

They are having a second baby and DIL says she will give him a dummy too. Why train a child to depend on one and then have the hard job of taking it away when they're older? Neither of my boys had one, one sucked his thumb probably until he was about two and only when he was tired, the other one didn't suck anything. The only thing he liked to do when he was tired was flick the edge of his blanket.

Isn't there some new research which says it is good for babies to have a dummy? Can't remember, something to do with speech possibly?

I wanted to say something to the mum who sat her toddler back in the trolley after eating in the supermarket café. He was happy, smiling and she immediately stuck his dummy in
Mine had dummies, but only to sleep, the dummies stayed in their bedrooms or if they were going to nap in the buggy. S just stopped using his. D gave hers to Santa in exchange for her presents at 3.

I'm another one who would prefer a dummy to thumb/finger sucking for the simple reason that it's easier to break babies of the dummy habit, as far as I can see. However, neither of my DDs would use a dummy - they only wanted me! One of them, eventually, discovered her fingers, though, while the other just got more independent on her own. But if a dummy can soothe a cranky or colicky baby, I'm all for it, no matter how it "looks."

My son sucked his thumb and my daughter her third and fourth fingers. They both had a piece of soft flannelette sheet to cuddle. They were very content babies which was probably down to luck.
DGS 1 was a really miserable grizzler until he was about four months. DD tried a dummy to sooth him but he would not accept anything like a comfort cloth or a dummy. He has fortunately turned out to be a delightful happy and generally laid back 3yr old.

Our DD2 cried non stop day and night (well that's what it felt like at the time!) and many is the time I wanted to sellotape a dummy into her mouth cos she just spat the thing out! She eventually had a sucky cloth which she grew out of.
I hate to see dummies in the mouths of toddlers when they're out and about and should be talking.
In church on Sunday (which is usually brill!) there was a much longed for toddler along the row with his DM and DGM with a dummy in all through the service. I wanted to scoop him up, take out dummy and talk and play-I'll get myself arrested yet!
And. . . Next to me was a young woman who chewed her nails all the way through and the young lady in front of me was a manic leg wobbler. Phew I felt drained! Wonder if God was trying to tell me something? . . . . .

DD had a dummy till she was three, her brother never took to one at all but did suck his thumb. It took years for his teeth to grow straight when he stopped. GS1 had a dummy but his brother wouldn't have one at all. We've only really used them for sleeping though, I don't see that a child who's out doing something interesting needs a dummy in their mouth.

My eldest (bottle fed) was never without his dummy. The other two (breast fed) weren't particularly interested. All three (now in their 30s) have perfect teeth and none of them needed a brace.

Neither of my Dils uses one, and the DGC are all quite happy without. Horses for courses.