The damn sunblock!

Poor you! I would phone tomorrow and say you are sorry you have had a disagreement and suggest talking it over over a cuppa some time. Don't let it escalate. Hope it settles!

I totally agree that boys of 8 ought to be able to apply sunblock themselves, particularly if they are out on an excursion or at camp. They should have been reapplying it during the day. As neither you or their mother were there to supervise during the day, I don't think it's your fault at all. Were the camp employees not supervising the application of sunblock? I don't think that your DD should have reacted as she did.
My 6 year old GS got sunburnt feet while at the beach after my DD forgot to apply the sunscreen. She just didn't think about his feet!

Are you paid to babysit for her? That's a bit odd isn't it? Is there anyone else in the house when they get up, who could help you?

Are you in this country. Whereabouts were they to get sunburnt today? It's been cloudy on and off.

Grandmama123 I agree that they should be able to do it themselves, and if it so much a part of the routine then perhaps they might have said "gran, what about our sunblock?"

As for the comments about "paid employee", well, if you really ARE a paid employee, rather than freelance, then you entitled to holiday pay, sick pay, and from February next year, a pension partly paid for by your employer!?

Sorry, but I think you daughter needs to (using the awful phrase) get over herself!

Well said phoenix. If you and your daughter have reached an agreement about payment, I expect the hourly rate is much less than she'd have to pay a nanny or childminder. I suspect she would find it difficult to get someone who'd do 12 hour days. She wouldn't find any day care open at 6.45, much less providing staff to help get three children up and organised at that time.
The sun block issue isn't all down to you either, the club the boys went to should have been ensuring all the children were properly re-slathered as the day went on.
Maybe your daughter can make alternative arrangements and you could become an ordinary grandparent. You could help out once a week, free of charge but for the rest of the time, the parents pay a professional.

I can only say ".Poor you." What an awful mess. Chilling and a chat over tea.does.seem a.good idea.

The sun block issue is a common one. Usually parents are asked to apply a coat before sending the child off to school/activity centre. The staff will neither apply their own cream (due to possible allergies), nor smear the child with his own (due to physical touching.) The best way is to squirt a blob into the child's hands and let him do it himself.

You could contact your daughter and discuss coming up with a plan prioritising the jobs she wants you to carry out. Has this ever happened before over a different issue? If not, I can assure you the sun cream problem is a highly emotive one with parents everywhere, so you are not alone.

Your daughter in being unreasonable...and a bit of a special snowflake.
If suncream is such a massive deal for her then her able bodied 8 year olds should be able to apply it with instruction.
I hope you don't find me intrusive but can I ask where she was during all this? And we're you paid?

Personally Grandmama123 I would have told your DD " to go stuff herself" .
I look after my 3 DGC on a regular basis . I have never once been given instructions or criticised by my DDiL for something I have either done or forgot to do. Is she perfect? If she doesn't trust your capabilities tell her to do it all herself . You are not bloody superwoman ! I look after mine to help DDiL and my DS so they can work, rest and sometimes play and I would not take kindly to being "told off" .

Oh dear. We had a sunscreen nightmare many years ago on holiday in Spain. The DC were old enough to apply their own and I reminded them over and over about it. One day DS insisted he had put his on and charged off into the sea. Unfortunately he'd put it on before taking off his teeshirt and ended up burnt. I felt very guilty - I hadn't checked that someone had helped do his back - but certainly made amends, sitting with him playing games in the shade for the rest of the holiday

I do think they need a bit of help with sunscreen as they could miss bits, even at 8.
However, they could have put it on each other. Obviously not wearing their hats either were they? Little boys!
If they are covered in sun block every time they go out and never get any natural vitamin D they could end up with a deficiency and even rickets.

Hope you can sort it out soon, I expect your DD was upset because one of them was burnt and it just escalated.

Ps are you in the States Granny123?
Sunshine? ?
A bus to camp?

However, do hope it all works out, although you do sounds as if you had your hands more than full, perhaps your DD should find someone to share the childcare.

I feel for you. With the kind of pressure you appear to have been under, I would have forgotten altogether even to ask the boys to apply sun cream! My GS is a nightmare when it comes to sun cream and my daughter does "get the face on" if I she finds out I have either (a) forgotten to apply it; (b) given up trying to get it onto a stroppy, argumentative nine year old without wrestling him to the ground and sitting on him! Life is too short. I would add that it is almost the only thing he does have a strop about. Having said that, I agree that your daughter is pushing the boundaries a bit talking to you as if she employed you! Not acceptable. They can be a bit of a pain, our adult children. I've just spent a week with both mine and their respective partners - never again!

Surley as well she should take this opportunity as a unpleasant life lesson for the boys.

You didn't apply sun cream when you were told. Now you're burnt and it Hurts. Sorry it hurts but hopefully now you'll remember to take extra care.

Yes, I do get paid for year round baby sitting, we look at it as my job, otherwise I would work elsewhere. Both parents are out of the house by by 7am, kids still asleep one on the verge of waking. I live in Canada. I love this forum!

Hi Bibbity,
My daughter is surgical nurse in the OR, her husband and herself leave their home before 7am. They pick me up and take me to their home and usually I do have to wake them, feed them, I do the dishes, tidy a bit but my main focus is our one and half year old grand daughters safety and nurturing. The camp ended Friday. It only lasted a week, however, they have a pool at their home, and when we are all there all day they put the sun block on. Yes, 12 hours was a long long day, no napping for me lol!
The special snowflake comment made me chuckle

Jalima,
Good point about the vit D deficiency. My husband also says the need the vit D, the sun block is over done. I agree that they may not be pro's applying the cream, but they surely need to learn now! Little Dani is busy girl I always have my eye on her. So need they need to be helpful, which they are if you ask.
The fact my daughter used the words, I stressed they use it daily, I would ask any paid employee, is the job too much?, I am allowed to ask, just turned my goat!
I'm sure they think I am super sensitive or messed up by quitting on the spot. I did what my gut told me to do. We never spoke to our parents like that when they baby sat.

While we were away last week, we visited a little bay near where we used to live in West Wales when our children were small. We spent a lot of time on that beach with the children in the summer and my son said "I don't remember you ever putting sun cream on us". I told him that no-one was kicking up a fuss about there being a hole in the ozone layer forty odd years ago. I don't think I ever bought sun cream or worried about whether they had hats on. I can't remember them suffering from sunburn either despite the salt air and the wind off the sea.

gillybob,
I get what you are saying, the only thing she 'stressed', her words, were to ensure the s screen is applied. I failed!!
I look at at it this way, I'm 64 I set my alarm for 5:30am so I can relax getting ready and I am picked up in an hour and a bit. I have my coffee, choose my outfit, I want to feel good all day. Have my smoke! As a gm the child receives so much more in terms of teachings, nurturing and pure love given. I know those boys inside and out. We all have have a good time, my g daughter and I are bestie's and I was just getting her into Pooh Bear and Christopher Robin stories on my iPad, songs and ABC's! Heaps of fun.
I'm sure she's aggravated I said they should be old enough as that is when all hell broke. As I disagreed with her! That day I was exhausted and had one of those horrible humidity headaches to boot. Figures.

I am a nurse too. Kids in the UK especially Scotland are developing Vit D deficiencies now because of the lack of sunshine in the UK. High protection sun screen is now recommended not sun block! Anyway if the kids were away all day they would have to re-apply it them selves. Is this not what is done in Oz? Any Australian Gransnetters?
Hope you can sort it out with your daughter Grandmama I hate conflict and shame for your grandsons and granddaughter if they are used to having you to care for them x

My daughter wants to chat.
She is coming over in a hour.
What should I say?
Recap .. She didn't like my comment about how I felt her almost 8 year olds were old enough. And I had had it and quit!
Guess she still needs me...... I thought I had my life back.
Lol

Hi Elainel, perhaps it is sunscreen, I'm not sure just now. Either way she is dramatic about it.
I hate conflict too and being confronted makes me sick.
She's quite the gal sometimes. Out spoken.

I think that's a good sign. I suspect she has realises that she went over the top a bit and is coming to smooth things over. I do hope so anyway. Yes, she needs you and so do your grandchildren.

I think that the paid skivvy/help needs a holiday. That is above and beyond grandmotherly devotion to have to get up at 5.30am every day. You are no longer 29 and it is such a responsibility. If your DD can find somebody to do what you do during those long hours, good luck to her.