Passing down family name

At the end of the day does it really matter.

After all, what's in a name. It may be 'tradition' . But getting along with

ALL the family is more important. To avoid upsetting one side of the family, or the other, choose something completely outside the box, if you know what I mean. Then both sides will be equally offended and will in time get over it! Or not, as the case may be! if they don't, their loss!!!

In total agreement Craicon! Cannot believe I would have forgiven my in laws if they had had this attitude! Why on earth can't you just be grateful that you have a beautiful baby boy in your family? So many people would love to be grandparents whatever the child was called.

We have the maiden name as middle name thing on both sides of the family. We have carried on the tradition on DH side with DH and DS having the same first two names. On tracing the tree back it seems that the branches split a few generations back and DH has a cousin with the same name. I contacted him and he has called his son something different.
DS is only 16 so only time will tell if the name carries on.
We overcome the confusion by calling them Senior and Junior.

It is wrong to presume every generation must do the same. That fails to recognise aspirations of each new generation. It also presupposes that there is some obligation on the future generations to comply with some unwritten arrangement.

Of much greater importance is the continued happy family. Be content that the generation now appearing will be there in the future.

TheMaggiejane.....similar to me, DD wanted to use the second Christian names of her daughter's two Grandmas....one (not me obviously) was sadly recently deceased. I thought it was a sweet idea but said 'please do not feel you have to use mine and lumber the Granddaughter with a whole lot of extra names - just use the departed Grandma's, but they insisted and DGD has an extra Christian name....was their choice and I salute them!

My 3 children all had a difficult time producing their (mainly healthy, but all lovely) children so frankly I couldn't care less what their names are, it's not the important part of having a baby. My daughter has just had her 3rd child after a very traumatic pregnancy and we were all over the moon but she now has a pulmonary embolism and things are very difficult! Let your son and DIL enjoy their baby and don't put any obstacles in their way to mar that enjoyment.

My OH's son is expecting a baby in August and they told him that they are intending to use his (handed down) name as a middle name. He told them 'please don't, I've always hated it, it's a horrible name that's why I never use it!' It's up to them though and if they use it it's their child and their choice.

My DH was given a christian name handed down through the generations. He hated it and was teased at school over it. When I was pregnant with DD, my FIL said he hoped if the baby was a boy we would give him the same name. My DH said definitely NOT.

For goodness sake does it really matter. The parents are entitled to chose whichever name they like. Unfortunately I am a product of names being handed down. Wouldn't wish it on anybody. However, there are worse things happening in this world.

As someone keen on researching family history, the same name being used down the generations is a nightmare - I have to log them like kings - James I, James II etc. And then naming a baby after the previous one that had died ... A totally different name is so easy to work from in comparison.

conners13 really? taking something away?

Having both my Dad, my brother and uncle with the same name, before my kid was born I said I wouldn't name it that name if it was a boy. Thankfully it was a girl and my DH and I chose a name we both loved and that had never been used before. Just be glad the baby is healthy and enjoy the time being a grandparent. Life is simply too short to bare a grudge / animosity over something so trivial.

More complicated than dogs pedigrees

One of the names my DD was looking at for her DS was Thomas, name of her DH's father and grandfather and also the name of my DS. Glad they went with Thomas as a middle name as I felt they would be taking something away from my DS!

I'm the eldest child and thankfully my grandparents had stopped the family tradition of add the middle name Aloysius to all the first born.

It's just a name, nothing more, nothing to get hurt about. What about DIL's father? He may have been hurt if your tradition had continued.

This O.P. needs to be referred to all those dreadfully sad discussions we've had on here about GPs loosing contact with their GC....then they would learn what's really important!
Being a good Grandparent is all about supporting your children to do the most rewarding and difficult job in the world - if you are very lucky you then get to a Grandparent......starting off in this way is going to make that a very fraught ride! Please just let it go and be loving and supportive to your children - its a tough world out there and being petty about some standing name is really only for those with thrones to worry about!

A family member had the same problem with her in laws who were insisting her child was given a family name. In fact it caused quite a rift for a while because the parents of the baby didn't like the name and called the baby something else (a much nicer, classic name)
Just enjoy this new little family member and don't get hung up on a name.

My son would be Fred...no thanks. My sil Gertrude..again no thanks. Fashions change. The family name goes through the surname surely??

Always had a penchant for royalty.My two DD's are Victoria and Elizabeth but frequently referred to by friends and some members of the family as Liz and Vic.

We have two family names - one from the Jewish ancestry side, passed from father to son. My DH hates it (his 3rd name) and we decided not to give it to DS. But MIL's father was George, his first son and GS were both George and we called our lump George while expecting, but were not intending it to stick. Guess what? Great-grandad was so chuffed that we decided to choose a non-family name for DS; kept George as second name and we kept my maiden name as his 3rd name, as I'm the last in family line. Everyone happy. The main problem with family names is that no-one knows which "George" we're talking about!

I thought this thread was gong to be about surnames. My Dad was a bit upset when Mum only had girls, and the family name would be lost forever.
I've written before about ours being a female dominated family - he had no brothers, only sisters. And no uncles or grand-uncles.
I called our oldest John, like Dad, but he has called his oldest a different name.

One of the pleasures with a new baby is choosing a name. Don't spoil it for these new parents. Your husband will have to get over it.

Once the GC gets older hopefully you will see the name suits him and what a mistake it would have been to use the family name. I have just realised my name has been handed down through the years and it wasn't used for my GD. I never gave it a thought as the parents chose her name and what a beautiful name it is. Enjoy your Grandson and forget about the name tradition.

Sorry but you have no right to expect a say in naming their child. Get over it and enjoy being grandparents.

The Mother and Father of the child are entitled to call it whatever they like. Just because you have the tradition it does not mean that they have to. However, old fashioned names are all the rage now so they might have thought about it as a middle name just to keep the peace. They didn't so you will have to get used to it. I was glad my child was not called after his Father's middle name, his Grandfather, Great Grandfather, before him were called Albert. I could not agree to my child being called that so we settled for another family name instead.