Grandchildren's attitude

When they were young my children were expected to be courteous, but I'm afraid affection cannot be taught. If they're not naturally demonstrative then there's not much to be done about that, but there is no excuse for their parents to overlook what is essentially bad manners!

Tend to agree Nanna Grampy it seems extremely rude to me.
I feel very lucky that despite my sons stepsons havingntheir real Gran over from s Africa the youngest 16 ran out to greet us hugs for me and they both bought us gifts from their part time jobs even tho youngest lost his,
Without realising it I guess we have built up relationship with them over last few years,
Of course oldest at 18 has girlfriend and he was on his computer a lot but also helped his mum layntable etc and gave us oour presents flowers for me, his grandmother and mum and large box Thorntons he also bought huge box for everyone to share. I think my sons partner must be so proud of them I certainly was.

If feel so sorry you had that rudeness because that's what it is, the boys were told to leave phones aside at table also.

I also agree your dh can't say anything it would t help.

We do try to keep in contact with them but to no avail I'm afraid. If my husband calls them they barely speak to him for more than a minute. I also blame the parents, but don't want to rock the boat.

Very occasionally she we see them or when they have stayed with us they are okay but they are never demonstrative and although we don't expect them to be like the children you see on the adverts, it would have been nice for them to have spoken to us and properly thanked us for the presents.

I think that making efforts to keep in touch with your grandchildren throughout the year will make a difference as all relationships are built up over time and need nurturing if they are to develop. Our children have had regular family holidays and several annual celebrations with their paternal grandparents and as a consequence they are very close. They rarely see my mother and she has never made any efforts to keep in touch with them so it's not surprising that their relationship with her is almost non-existent. I have a granddaughter in New Zealand and we regularly Skype or FaceTime so even though the distance is great we're still able to keep in regular contact and thus build up a bond.

I'm sad to hear how you were treated. I know when children reach a certain age they do become less inclined to socialise with their grandparents but forgive me if I'm blunt- I blame the parents !

Its up to them to set the tone and what is and isn't acceptable. Surely an hour spent in your company is not too much hardship.

We spent the Christmas period with our 4 grandchildren, the oldest is 11 and whilst she played games happily with us, she did take herself off with her ipad for a quiet hour away from us and the smaller children.

Maybe you can build more of a rapport with the children by email or post throughout the year to make next year a nicer occasion? I think I'd be tempted to mention it in the kindest way to the parents too.

Yes we had the same thing doing our rounds yesterday. It's these computer games to blame. My DS and DIL kept dragging them back downstairs. Made them say thank-you and give hugs etc.

I think you might do best to let this wash by you and not read anything negative into it - it is clearly just how that family operate. I have been with my large family for the last 3 days and the children are off and about together playing their own games. We chat to them as they flit by!

I remember being forced to sit and talk to my grandparents when I wanted to be playing, and what a chore it was! If they do not see you very often then I guess it is hard for them to make conversation with an adult and find things to talk about.

Don't let it spoil your Christmas.

I Don't have any suggestions on how to improve the situation Julesmm, but do heartily sympathise. I have a 4 year old GS, and although I love him, I don't always like him. That sounds awful, but he is an only child and pandered to, and the looks he gives at times, well, I shudder.
Hope he grows up to be as nice as his cousins.

It is fairly normal for their age , they hardly know you . I find my lot , who used to be all over me are now up in the rooms on gadgets . All is not lost as the 15 yr old has come out of hibernation and greets us and stays for a chat