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Grandparenting

My Granddaughter's going away

(43 Posts)
BeeGran Fri 26-Jan-18 09:46:12

Hello, I'm new on here. Just found the site but it looks really interesting.
My much beloved granddaughter whom I am very close to has decided to leave her very promising job and take a year off to go travelling. She's young (23) and I know so many young people do this and I used to be a keen traveller myself. But I can't help feeling this horrible dread that something will happen to her while she is away. She's travelling on her own and although she's very sensible..I'm terrified I admit. I wouldn't dream of raining on her enthusiasm though but doesn't anyone have any experience of this? Or advice on how to handle it? Or tips for keeping her safe I could subtly pass on? Her mum (my daughter) definitely doesn't have the same adventurous gene - made my parenting much easier in many ways! I do see a lot of myself in my granddaughter so maybe I know all too well the scrapes she could find herself in.

veeoc Fri 26-Jan-18 18:33:30

I read somewhere that a small, cheap safety device to take travelling anywhere is a door stop! When you close your bedroom door at night, stick the doorstop under it, so even if someone gets hold of a key, they won’t be able to open the door. Thought that sounded good advice.

Smithy Fri 26-Jan-18 19:21:39

Just remembered, its a good idea to photocopy your passport detail page and keep it in a different place to your passport.

Andyf Fri 26-Jan-18 20:23:08

BeeGran I can understand that you are worrying. Our son went off for a year at a similar age Starting in Bangkok. Although he went alone he was never alone. He met so many lovely young people along the way and they are still friends now.
He came back a year later a totally different person and I don't think he would be where he is now if he hadn't gone.
You will worry at first but soon settle down and realise that your Granddaughter is having the time of her life.
We too paid for full insurance cover, thankfully it wasn't needed.

Jalima1108 Fri 26-Jan-18 20:23:56

Mine have travelled on their own and with others.

The thing is - you will always worry but the things you worry about may never happen, and those you should worry about they don't tell you about until afterwards.

123flump Fri 26-Jan-18 20:57:45

Ruthyo I bought one of those sterile medical kits for my daughter and she did need it. She was fine in the end but had a 3 day stay in an African hospital. The only problem was they wouldn't tell her what was happening, she was only a girl. Fortunately one of the young men she met in the accommodation went in ambulance with her and pretended to be her fiance so they would talk to him. His dad was a doctor so every time they were going to give her an injection he phoned his dad to check it was OK. Fortunately they didn't tell me till she was discharged.

I think lots of young people travelling meet up and support each other.

I also bought her a special water bottle that filtered water and got her a cash card so I could send her money if she needed it and I could cancel it here if she lost it or had it stolen. She had a second card hidden as she does have form for losing bank cards.

She was on facebook so even if she didn't call, she did lots, I could look at facebook and see what was happening.

She survived, she thrived, I got a few grey hairs. Enjoy the photos and the funny stories.

grandtanteJE65 Sat 27-Jan-18 14:28:27

I'd be nervous too about a young woman travelling alone, but they are all doing it these days.

Copies of passport, medical insurance yes, but upload them to a sky drive or keep them on your e-mail account, so that if the paper copies get lost, stolen or whatever, the traveller or the police can access the copies.

Try to persuade anyone travelling alone to carry a card stating "In the case of accidents or emergencies, please contact" followed by phone number, e-mail and postal address of a near relative. I know it sounds morbid, but if it is ever needed it will save a lot of time and trouble.

Details of allergies and blood type should be carried too.

chrissyh Sat 27-Jan-18 15:30:53

My DD too had a break from a very good job and went travelling on her own aged 21. The only thing I really worry about are my DC and especially my DD who was a free spirit. However, after the initial period, surprisingly, I settled down and quite enjoyed not laying awake at night worrying where she was. This was 17 years ago and communication wasn't as good as it is now. She survived, a much happier person.

Antonia Sat 27-Jan-18 16:25:42

Tanyaswisse I do feel for you, you must be feeling upset at this. I have friends who travel to the USA every year and stay for 6 weeks or so. Is a holiday a possibility, to give you something to look forward to? Also remember all the different ways you can keep in touch nowadays. Why not set up a regular time for Skype or facetime.

NotAGran55 Sat 27-Jan-18 16:53:50

2 bank accounts in case one fails or she loses one card . My friends son lost his bank card within 15 minutes of arriving in Oz .

NotAGran55 Sat 27-Jan-18 17:01:33

My son had a gap year and set off when he was 18 with just 2 nights accommodation booked in New Zealand and no firm plan . He had an amazing time and returned a different person . Relaxed , confident and ready for anything . He got his degree ( a 1st ) and is now busy working and stashing the cash for his next adventure .
Your GD is a grown woman and will be just fine .

Menopaws Sat 27-Jan-18 18:28:13

Quietly cross your fingers but openly wish her well and be delighted she has the spirit in her to discover her world, enjoy her travels with her , there is plenty of modern day ways, and she will love you more for supporting her however hard it is for you. You will learn so much from her. Good on her

Starlady Sun 28-Jan-18 11:06:25

I don't blame you for worrying. But I agree with Flump, keep up with her on fb, etc. and you'll probably feel better. Try not to "bother" her, but maybe call once in a while (no more than once a month), as well, as it may help to hear her voice.

wildswan16 Sun 28-Jan-18 11:21:55

What a wonderful opportunity for your GD. Enjoy her travels with her, learn about the places she is visiting. I'm sure she may visit places you have never dreamed of going to.

You will miss her of course, but be happy for her and pleased that her family has produced a confident and adventurous young woman.

Yorkshiregel Wed 28-Feb-18 09:34:20

It depends very much on where she intends to go travelling. My eldest had the wanderlust but I put that down to the fact that we travelled a lot with OH's job. RAF. He didn't go backpacking though, he went to places like Italy, Spain, France, not jungle trekking or places such as that. He did go up Mont Blanc on his own to get his Mountain Leader qualification. He survived and was all the more settled for it. My youngest went to live in Australia for 6 yrs, but back in uk now. They need to experience things, however to put herself in danger going to somewhere like Iraq etc would be asking for trouble. Better if she could find someone to go with her.

Yorkshiregel Wed 28-Feb-18 09:44:48

Do not forget about skype! My son kept in touch from Australia and it was a God send to us. Made all the difference. Make sure you do not 'phone every day as that becomes a pain, especially if she is trying to be independent. My DIL tells her son to ring, and wait for three rings then ring off, unless of course he wants to talk to them about something. At least it is a signal that all is well. When he goes off she says 'three rings!' and he knows exactly what she means.

GrannyGravy13 Wed 28-Feb-18 10:24:26

Please take your anti depressants, if you had a bad cold you would take medication, try to think of it the same way ?

littleflo Thu 01-Mar-18 08:28:58

My eldest son had several gap years from when he was 19, before he settled down. They made him the man he is today. My grandson 23 has also been an adventurer from a young age. He has been to South America twice for 3 months each time. He is off to Australia next week for 6 weeks and then is going to work for Camp America for the summer.

With the internet, I think the world is safer for travellers, they can access help and information really quickly. I would not give her any safety information. 23 is hardly young and she might see it as undermining her. Just wish her well and get yourself on face-time so that she can contact you and reassure you.