Can a baby be TOO good?

If a very small baby is too good it can be a warning sign. I had friends who were a nurse and a doctor who were thanking their lucky stars they had such an undemanding baby. One day they realised he was not good he was ill . They sure felt silly to have missed the clues.

Hope everything's all right, now and in the future. Hopefully it's just an indication of future personality.
My dear late husband was a quiet, contented baby who grew up to be a laid-back and likeable adult. His elder brother though was a naughty, difficult child who couldn't be left for five minutes. He grew up to be a right PITA, argumentative, always thought he was right and had to have the last word. He didn't get on with his mother which was a tragedy for them both. Psychiatrists would have a field day.

DC2 had to be wakened to be fed, spent the day watching DC1, was placid and rarely cried - and is now in mid-30s and highly intelligent (with a very sharp tongue sometimes!). And yet it was DC2 I took to the baby clinic because I was so worried! I thought all little ones never slept like DC1. So you are not alone Flaxseed.

None of my children or grandchildren could ever have been described as good or laid back and neither could I! But my grandmother used to tell me that she once took my mother to the doctor because she cried. The doctor pointed out that all babies cry and she said "This one doesn't!" it turned out the poor baby had Scarlet Fever. I will just add that my mother did not grow up to be quiet or laid back!

Had my first at 19. Delightfully easy and sunny child. Second was fairly hard going. Third (after 20 year age gap) total nightmare. Now I can say after 40 years, first is the hardest, second about the same and third is the easiest. I’ve learnt young children’s personalities are not necessarily any indicator of how they will turn out.

My dd was a calm and contented baby. She is now mum to a 15 month old and I have never seen such a laid back baby in all my life. He goes to bed at 5pm and gets up at 7 the next morning. He loves his food and yet he never seems to put on much weight. He looks like he hasn't got any hair although it is actually coming through a beautiful auburn colour. He doesn't walk unaided yet but he has managed a few steps before sitting back down. If I'm honest, I would say he is probably a good 2 months behind many children the same age.
However, what we do have is a darling little boy who sleeps for England, shovels his good down him, crawls at a rate of knots, babbles to himself and smiles constantly.
My dgs will catch up in due course and when your little one is 2 and having a meltdown you will look back and wonder what you were worried about. They are all different, you just enjoy your little one

I would not worry at all. No two babies are the same. My DD1 was very contented, easy baby and child although more difficult as a teenager. My DD2 was a difficult baby but brilliant teenager. She has a DD1 who was a difficult baby to settle and now at almost 3 is adorable but on the go all the time. Her DD2 who is 4 weeks old is so far so chilled out and contented so completely different so far.

You may find your GS gets a little bit more difficult in the toddler years. If he is hitting milestones more or less on time then there shouldn't be anything to worry about. My DD2 had pre eclampsia with both her pregnancies but no indication that this affected her DDs beyond being induced/delivered early. I had pre eclampsia with my DD2 and again although I was induced 4 weeks early it didn't affect her.

Flaxseed, please don't worry, my son was exactly like this, smiley, placid and calm, the total opposite to me in fact ! Thirty odd years on and he's still the same. You are lucky to have such a Grandson.It's not easy to understand if you are highly strung yourself, but rejoice in it, he's fine !

Bless you, I know what you mean, you can hardly believe it they are so easy to cope with!
I have always felt that children sort of instinctively know what their parents and grandparents can cope with, and so go that far, but not too much further!
For example my daughter slept like a dream as a baby, and I only had one totally sleepless night, ever. I think she knew Mummy had a breaking point if she didn’t get any sleep. But later in her life between say 11 and 16 she was hell on legs! At one time I said “you know I love you, and will ALWAYS love you no matter what? But just now, I dont LIKE you very much!” She also gave me worried times in her later teens and 20’s, but we got through. She’s a Mum of two herself now, they are 2 and 4, and she is learning just how hard the stages are. But no matter how easy or how hard they are, it’s worth it. So be grateful if yours is easy now, and brace yourself for when they are not, as it surely will come at some stage or another,

Thank you to everyone who has commented on this thread.

I do feel reassured and am determined to enjoy him!

Thanks for the comments re CBT too.
Can’t remember who was questioning why there seems to be so many people suffering anxiety these days.
Obviously, I don’t know the answer - however I do know that mine stems from 3 life changing events that happened over a two year period.
Until that point I was actually pretty chilled

My 2 boys were very different as one was placid and well behaved and the other was the total opposite. As for milestones my eldest didn't walk until 19 5mths but he now has an electronics degree. Don't worry about it as time will tell and there's nothing you can do about it even if something is wrong at this young age.

My second baby was like this too - such a contrast to No 1. Contented, happy, never cried and rather late with milestones. In fact he was very similar to his older cousin so I didn't have any worries at all.
Both have grown up into intelligent men with degrees and good careers.

Just because some babies who may have problems display these characteristics does not mean that the converse is true.

My son was such an easy baby, he's now 40 and I still tell everyone how angelic he was. He could be wide awake and I'd put him down to bed and he would never cry, he'd wake up in the morning and just lie in his bed and not make a sound until either myself or my now ex went in to get him.
We didn't have anyone to babysit for us, so we were forever taking him out until late at night and he'd just fall asleep on someone's sofa with a blanket on him, no complaining at all.
First day at nursery he was as calm as anything, same goes for school in general, just never had any problems with him at all.
I'm a very anxious person, had a terrible pregnancy with him as I would lie awake at night imaging all sorts of horror stories about giving birth and was convinced that my stress levels were so high that I'd be bound to give birth to an anxious child, couldn't be further from the truth

Flaxseed I did research into Autism at the Institute of Psychiatry, not all that long ago. I had to assess and diagnose Autism. So, please believe me, your delightful DGS is too young to assess. It is true that retrospectively parents of Autistic children do report a high number of "good" babies.

However, this is not a red flag and many babies who do not develop Autism are contented, easy-going and uncomplaining, like your DGS.

My middle daughter has 4 children, the 4th is amazingly easy-going. He didn't complain about anything as a baby. No. 3 as a toddler, amused us by doing so many weird things but also had marked speech delay. We were quietly watching in case any more "Autistic" signs appeared. I have Autistic relatives. DGS3 seems fine and dandy. No 4 is now a toddler and the two of them are a big handful getting up to all sorts of pranks.

My DD no3 has a second child, now 1yr old, who was also a baby who never complained, slept like a log where ever you put him and was just so easy it made you feel guilty! I shall have a word with him about this when he's older as his mum gave me a terrible time when she was a baby and I thought that at last she would find out what it was like... (She's one of those people for whom everything always goes perfectly so she thinks it must be my fault if she cried as a baby for example.)

I expect you can see where I'm going... Please stop watching and worrying over your lovely DGS and try to simply enjoy him! None of us has a crystal ball, so don't spoil today imagining bad things about tomorrow. Just let him be himself and love him for it. Let each day take care of itself.

Wishing you good luck with CBT, it's great stuff!

My Daughter was a perfect baby, never woke unless I did it. Very contented and laughed a lot. She just loved her sleep and still does now she is 42. She was and is a high achiever.
My son was the same, but didn’t need as much sleep.

Assuming his hearing is fine (and that's checked at 6 months?), do not worry.

I remember being concerned about my first son because he was so quiet, slept a lot, fed easily. In fact he was no trouble at all and I thought motherhood was a piece of cake. He's now 57 and perfectly normal, although has remained a quiet person.
Then I had another son who was the complete opposite in every way...all hell was let loose! But he grew up to be normal too.
So try not to worry too much, although I do understand how you feel, as I felt worried too.

My youngest was the most placid and easy going baby until he was 2 and turned into a wild and boisterous toddler. Maybe make the most of this time assuming there are no major problems. Relax and enjoy!

He sounds like my eldest gs who was a lovely, happy baby even when unwell. Everyone adored him and this continued through childhood. He is now a lovely, but often grumpy, and very typical teenager so make the most of yours now!

My gd was as good as gold as a baby. Always slept well and had a smile permanently stuck on her face.

She is now 2........

She will not do as she is told, hits her sister, is constantly naughty and wingey. Her mother is at her wits end. She thought her sister was bad but my goodness.

Enjoy the little darling while you can as when she reaches 2 you will know about it. ?

I can only echo a couple of other posts here about autistic spectrum babies. My son has high functioning Aspergers and was a total and complete nightmare as a baby. When he was awake he was screaming - always unhappy, wouldnt be comforted, hated being picked up or nursed. Luckily he did sleep or I dont know how I would have coped. He was the very opposite of calm and placid. Daughter (who is not on the spectrum) never slept as a baby but was invariably cheerful and chilled out.

I can understand your concern. We 'study' our children/ GC more diligently these days and it is difficult not to compare them with other babies of a similar age. Because he is so placid no doubt the people around him are also calm and happy which reflects back in his behaviour. When he hits the 'terrible twos' you will probably be saying what a noisy, difficult little toddler he is!

My eldest son was a happy contented baby who smiled at everyone and very rarely cried, even if he was unwell - he just became quieter. He was a delight to have around and I was very thankful for that as I suffered from PND after his birth and if he had been a difficult baby I'm not sure I would have coped.

Once he had two brothers of course the usual sibling rivalry began followed by the teenage angst years. He is now a very happy and laid back 39 year old who, when his second child decided to arrive very quickly, calmly got on with delivering her without batting an eyelid! Both of his children were also calm, quiet, happy babies - till they got to about 2 1/2 !

I'm sure there is nothing to worry about. Just enjoy the peace!

My friend's baby was so good & placid we often forgot about her. One day we left her out in the back garden in her walker (she was under a year) & only realised it had started raining when the dog started scratching the back door to come in! Baby was sitting there quite content trying to catch raindrops!! She is now a high powered business woman. (We were dreadful young mothers only just 21 & 2 and it wouldn't have occurred to us to worry!)

My daughter's second baby is very content and smiley. I put it down to my daughter being much less stressed than she was with her first. Just enjoy him. Our grandson is a pleasure to babysit.

My grandson is 5 months old, has always been placid, now he can respond he smiles and chuckles at everyone, is happy for anyone to pick him up. He does have very calm parents and although his two step siblings are just in their teens they are similar in temperament, their mum has always had boundaries with them and routine and they don’t push their luck, so perhaps it is part nature and part nurture.

If you are anxious no doubt you will worry, but it does sound as if this is just a happy, content and relaxed baby.