Head Banging GS

Thank you to everyone who has contributed to this plea. GS is still headbanging but it seems to have been less this week. Maybe we are less anxious about it having read your replies. It's great to know other people have been through it and come out the other side with happy, healthy little ones and I'm sure GS will too, just reading your stories has helped immensely.
What a great crowd you are! xx

My son used to head bang straight on to a concrete floor. It is very stressful. I read a piece in Dr Jolly, who said walk out of the room leaving the door open. This worked for us ur son stopped banging his head. We did not have the night banging though.

Perhaps he just hates being hemmed in 11/2 is young but maybe he’d be better in a little toddler bed that he could get out of and trot into mum and dads bed Mine used to potter in if they woke up and just get in with me and we all slept Is he going to bed too early ? How many times a night does this happen ?
The other thing is maybe try a travel cot nothing at all to bang his head on there

Reward acceptable behaviour and ignore the unacceptable - I learnt this many years ago when on a training course while working as a physio in a unit for children with learning disabilities. It's hard to do but should work - even getting his parents' attention is a reward.

Cot buffers are now out as there is a risk the child could get tangled in them and cause injury or worse.

"The thought of putting padded hats on a 16month old is unworkable in my opinion and he’d probably strangle himself trying to get it off ".
I agree Bluebell.

I asked before what is he actually banging his head on in the middle of the night if it’s the cotsides use bumpers if it’s the mattress don’t worry
The thought of putting padded hats on a 16month old is unworkable in my opinion and he’d probably strangle himself trying to get it off
I think your families anxiety is probably making him worse as it’s getting him a lot of negative attention in the middle of the night Can’t they ignore him once they know he’s safe and sound I can’t imagine harm he can do to himself inside a cot, or is he climbing out ?

My daughter used to bang her head till she bled. She dinted the wall in the sitting room with her banging and was always trying to get outside so she could bang her head on the paving slabs. She stopped doing it at about three and is now perfectly normal and a top flight lawyer.

DD was a head banger from being able to sit up. I believe it was frustration at not being able to make herself understood.
In her teenage years she bacame a head banger again when she got into heavy metal music.

Doula = someone who helps mothers/couples transition into parenthood when one becomes pregnant. Help and advice pre and post natal including excercise, feeding, routines, strategies. They are a support to the mother, not a midwife or medically trained professional.

Get h8m a head protection helmet, similar to those used by boxers when practicing. Ensure his cot is well padded, really really well padded.

I had one grandchild who was a breath holder oh my word that is scary too They re crafty little things aren’t they when they can’t get theit own way

What the heck’s a doula ?

Oh dear this does bring back memories of many years ago. My first born - a boy - was a head banger at any time he was thwarted in anything. Would actually crawl over to somewhere like fire hearth so he could have somewhere hard to bang on. Had bruises also. strong minded lad, it stopped once he was able to talk and let us know what was getting upset about. Grew up to be a normal, lovely man, good career, lovely wife. Celebrates his 50th birthday later this year.

How much does a doula charge for 10 hours in total pre and post natal? My DD has told me in Tunbridge Wells it is £1,000 which is £100 per hour??

In the 15th century, babies and toddlers wore padded hats, consisting of a thick roll of cloth attached to an baby's bonnet, so that the roll protected both the forehead and the back of the child's head.

I would make one and put it on the bairn at night then ignore his head-bashing as the risk of him harming himself will be lessened.

Like most forms of babies' bad habits or naughtiness it will stop once he discovers that Mummy isn't paying any attention.

My grandson would headbang on the wooden floor. I think it was frustration at not being able to do what he wanted. He grew out of it, so don't worry. Maybe pad the cot so he doesn't hurt himself.

My son wasn't a headbanger but he used to stand up in his cot and rock it so violently that it travelled across the floor to the open door. As he did this he was bellowing...a very noisy process.

I ignored it and it soon stopped - but ignoring it was the hardest thing to do.

Have you tried any of the baby-calming herbal medicines?
Cot buffers as well.
Or herbal sleep aids for Mum and Dad?

Julie I will pm you.

What’s he banging his head on ? Isn’t that what cot bumpers are for
I wouldn’t worry probably boredom if he’s awake when everyone else is asleep he wants attention I think the more his parents worry the more he’ll use it as a weapon to get them running

Not that I saw but he used to shake the cot, so he might have been and he used to climb out of his cot when very tiny and we couldn't figure out how he did it, until I heard him one night and watched him, he was very ingenious.
Just a thought, we put a few toys on the side of the cot, they were like activity type things that attached to the rails and we'd hear him playing on those if he woke up. Quite a few teddies as well.
I used to panic when he was banging his head on the kitchen tiles but if I didn't rush over he would stop and look round to see why I wasn't doing.
It is upsetting to see though but if I was stopping him doing something I would offer him something else at the same time.
You mentioned that even if they take him into their bed, he still won't sleep and messes about, so he might just be awake and want to play.
I'm thinking maybe if when he starts getting frustrated in the night and he's headbanging, they could just give him say a little computer type thing and tell him to be quiet and if he starts again, take it off him and just leave him and grit their teeth. He will be better when he can tell them what he wants, he'll probably talk very early as well.
It does stop though but probably sooner than three, as he started it so young. He's probably going to be a live wire though and he's probably into everything already. Very curious! Probably very clever!

Thanks Fennel, They've tried cuddly toys, blankets but nothing works. He wont take a dummy so we are at a loss at what else to try.
All our reading says usually stops by age 3 so that's in a year and 8 months! We really hope he stops sooner than that. I don't think my DD can take much more.
Buffybee, did he head bang in the night?

Thanks both, thanks all

Yes! My son was a Head-banger!
Every time he was stopped from doing something dangerous or generally not having his own way.
I mentioned it to various people and was told it was not that unusual, to ignore it and it would stop.
Which I did and it did stop quite soon.

I know you can buy protective helmets for children who are headbangers. But I wouldn't suggest this unless it has been agreed by a specialist paediatrician.
If the child is ok in other ways hopefully it's a phase.
Maybe try substituting a comfort blanket or soft toy? Does he have a dummy? (Not recommending that but out of interest.)

yes sodapop, he's been checked out as fine. He's displaying normal behaviour in every other way; just this aspect is very upsetting to watch.

Reading the OP reminded me that one of my DS used to rock his body and bang his head quite violently at night to go to sleep and if waking during the night. He also carried this on as a teenager although the frequency and length of incidents gradually decreased. I don't remember thinking they had stopped but they must have.

I never noticed any bruises or difficult behaviour, he was a happy and healthy child. I was told not to worry by the health visitor, she said she had come across it several times and it was just his way of getting to sleep. I was worried for a while but, as there seemed to be no consequences, just accepted it. I just had to warn any babysitters.