Not seeing my grandchildren

the ex keeps trying to involve the Police (unsuccessfully ..but disturbing)..if we contact

Under what grounds are the police being involved?

Why is it taking your son so long to go to court?

Five months is early days....

Things DO resolve themselves (it took us 5 years) and the courts usually allow access to fathers.
Don't be scared by police even if they visit, they have to do their job. Just stay calm, say nothing derogatory.
Have hope

Still to go to court..

Has your son tried to go to court to be able to see his children?

If your son gets access, will he bring them to see you sometimes?

Do you think he'll get access?

there has to be a valid reason why he isn't allowed access.my Ex SIL is a nightmare but he still has access to his two children ..sadly he fought for it and then doesn't bother actually seeing them!

Unless there's a court order in force your son has every right to see the children, even bringing them to see you.

Just make sure that your son gets the right legal advice and help to get appropriate access to his children.

I've heard of someone who has had to re-fight the legal battle several times - he gets access and all goes along OK for a while, then the ex objects to something and it all starts again. Very hard.

But he'll be able to show his children, when they're older, that he made the effort to be in their lives. I think that's important for them and him.

Thank you...feels a bit better talking about it...

That is dreadful. I am so sorry for you.

I hope it all gets sorted officially soon and then you are able to share your son's access time.

Thank you..my son has not seen his children either..
the ex keeps trying to involve the Police (unsuccessfully ..but disturbing)..if we contact..
kind of know we have lost them now...

I really feel for you. Try to remain friendly with both sides, despite the acrimony, never take sides. You could try sending DiL the occasional text saying that this must be such a difficult time for her, but that if there is any way you can help, to let you know. When things settle down she may be glad of the odd babysitting session as she is on her own.

Perhaps you son might be able to briing the children over on one of his access visits. You might be able to get letters or books to them that way. I'm afraid all you can do now is bide your time and be there for the whole family, not easy I know.