Connecting with my granddaughter

My son is in Canada and we Skype each week. I also have no idea when I will see them again. My grand daughter is now 3 and she knows who I am. As soon as she "hears" Skype she shouts nanny. Just talk to your grand daughter at the same time as you speak to the rest of the family, she will know who you are.

Our DGD lives in Korea so we don't see her in person very often (understatement!). She's 6 now, and for her first 3 or 4 years I had similar worries, as it was hard to get her to join in with video calls, sometimes just walking away, sometimes switching off the computer. However, she now engages happily with us on Skype, WhatsApp or Messenger and obviously knows who we are. As her English improves, we're able to chat more and I'm confident that once all this madness is over and we can meet again in person (fingers crossed for next summer) we'll have a wonderful time together. No, the situation isn't what we'd like it to be, but I guess we have to acknowledge our pain and heartache and learn to live with how things are. It's not easy, and I'd have a hard time believing anyone who said it was. Sending virtual hugs!

Maybe record yourself reading a favourite story - a few short stories so her parents can play them to her at quiet times. Or record yourself singing a few songs - as if you were there with her I mean. DGD is 3 and during the phase 1 lockdown she could only manage a couple of minutes of FaceTime then wander off. Her brother age 6 would speak for about 5 minutes then lose interest. To do things maybe if you got some play dough or paints and arranged with her parents for her to have some then you could make virtual shapes or paint with her "Look DGD, Granny LouTog has made a blue snake. Can DGD make a pink snake. See DGD, Granny LouTog has painted an orange cat. Can you paint a green cat DGD?" Don't know if that would work but it might. Just keep it short as their attention span is so short.

I now have to Skype with my 2 year old grandson. It's hard, because he gets bored very easily. I like to do it everday, because this will be the first time I am properly gone from him (I was there for his birth and he and his mum lived with me until I moved away last month). But he isn't interested.

My daughter sends me videos of him and photographs most days. But it is hard.

I sympathise with you. I have a slightly different challenge. I am currently living with my only grandchild and her parents, while waiting for flights home-delayed due to Covid-19. She is nearly 10 years and an only child. However, I sense she is becoming 'distant,' something I would expect from a teenager. Perhaps children are growing faster than we appreciate. I think the novelty of having Granny around does wear off.

Buy 2 books of same title, get one mailed to her, one to you.
You can read it to her over Skype/FaceTime.
If a success repeat.

I lived abroad from my parents all my life and they send postcards, letters and parcels every single month to my two sons. The boys loved their grandparents letters and knew them as well as other relatives who lived near us. When they visited it was for 2-3 weeks at the time, at least twice a year so they got very close indeed. Distance is nothing these days you can make it work. Enjoy

Two of my grandchildren are in America and whilst before lockdown we did see them twice a year we FaceTime each week and they are very attentive. Last week the youngest one, aged 6 actually called me herself which was a great surprise. I don’t expect them to sit and chat to me for ages, they are usually busy doing something, but we talk about their life, where they’ve been , what they are doing, etc. and despite the distance I feel we are still an important part of their lives- just very different for us in comparison with the grandchildren who live locally but for them it is an entirely normal relationship as they known no other.

A cushion with a picture of you on for her to cuddle.

I have played games with my Older grandchildren over the internet. We had a game of children’s monopoly they move all the pieces on the board, but l have my own dice, so can throw my own at my turn . I t worked well. I think this could be replicated with other practical activities, if both sides have the same equipment and resources eg painting, cutting out etc

Have you tried the Caribu app? It’s designed for children and you can interact with the either playing little games (probably too young for that), colouring, reading their online stories or just chatting face to face. Mine love it

How about singing songs together if they're old enough.

Just what I was going to suggest marionk

At one she would enjoy bee bow, or peekaboo. That will make her laugh.

Our grandson lives 5 hours away from us at the moment so I send him little presents (maybe yours could be given a little present sent by you to be given to them whilst you’re talking to them so you can see?). I FaceTime him and speak to him weekly, that’s all you can do really during this awful time.

My GD in Australia only started to concentrate more on me during FaceTime when she was almost 3. Before that she soon became bored, and vied with me for her parents’ attention. Now she often comes on at our midday (her breakfast time) and 11pm (her bedtime) She loves to chat while she eats, and I share her bath time, then read her a bedtime story. Her current favour is My Naughty Little Sister. She usually produces a soft toy to join in the story, or ‘little grandma’ who is the old lady from her Lego set.
Her little cousin, who is almost 4 months old, appears at any time of the day, with his mum, whenever he happens to be awake and happy. I chat to both of them, and he is starting to give me a few smiles.
Just keep in contact with them and you will evolve a way of interacting. They will soon build up a good relationship with you.

Send letters and postcards,. Ours only live 200 miles away, but whenever we go anywhere we send them both a post card. In this day and age, post is so rare that it is really exciting for a child to see something for them come through the postbox. Sometimes we send little presents, a pencil and notebook, a small toy. They can then show you on whatever software you are using what they have got and when it came and they will always associate you with those little treats.

My 2 GDs grew up in Australia and only recently returned. I bought 2 of the same books sent one to them and kept one myself then I’d FaceTime them when they were in bed and I’d read them parts of the story and they had the same book so they could look at the pictures it kept them engaged and something to look forward to nanny calling to read to them. Also I wrote a story of a couple of months in my life and read that to them so they got to know what I was doing as well. Hope that helps. You can get good priced books from book depository. Com and they’ll will send direct to Australia.

When my first grandson was born their auntie (my daughter) did such a lovely thing. She made a book for him featuring any aunt, uncle, grandparents, cousings etc that wanted to participate. It took a bit of time but she is good at this sort of thing and is good at crafts. We each provided a photo of ourselves and wrote a chatty piece about ourselves, our likes, dislikes, childhood, hopes,dreams, aspirations, jobs, reality, hobbies, nicknames etc. etc. so that he could read it for himself eventually and hopefully get a picture of the 'real' us. He is now 12 years old and some of the contributors are no longer with us.