Calling SS on Tuesday

Thank you @Vickysponge

They are being educated. Just not in the way you want them to be educated. Who is to say whether they are behind or not? Does it matter when they learn, so long as they get there in the end? Children aren’t robots, they don’t all learn the same thing at the same age. In most other countries children don’t even begin school until six or seven years old. The UK is an outlier in this respect, sending 4yos to school.

Granypie

I understand that how Dil brings up her children is 100% up to her. I have no say in that at all.

When it comes to the children's education it's their right being denied and as far as I can see Law being broken.

I too have never played Minecraft but a 7year old on weekdays should be in school or learning proper lessons NOT playing Minecraft from 10am until gone midnight.

I agree with you. Not sure what you can do but I would be as worried as you are. ?

They're behind other children of their age as they are not having an education. Children in schools are reading and writing long before 7.

Behind what?

They're behind

And here’s an article. www.theschoolrun.com/what-is-unschooling

Your grandchildren are being educated, Granypie - just not in a manner that you approve of, and I can’t see why your approval is necessary, as they’re not your children. If you Google ‘Unschooling’ you’ll find out more about it. I cannot see that there’s anything to report to SS, provided the children are well-cared for.

If your son doesn’t like his children being unschooled then he needs to take responsibility himself and make moves to change things, not get his mum to do it.

I can't believe how he authorities leave them to their own devices to get on with this. I'd have thought they were inspected or on a register or something

He did know I didn't know

Your son needs to do something, not you.
I imagine he will have to answer a lot of questions if SS get involved and will probably be involved too, not just your DIL.

I find it hard to a believe that a dad has no idea about his children's education for 7 years.

Sorry typo I'll put SS call on hold

No I believe he had to have been worried to have told me I never knew of it before he said and showed me articles about it.

Maybe I should out the as call on hold as he has now said he will register them at a school here and have them stay with us for two weeks and send them everyday when a place comes up. Hopefully they'll see they've missed out

Where does your son stand in all this?

Just an innocent passive bystander?

Again, it is up to your son to do something about it.

But your son has gone along with this for 7 years granypie and only now with your influence is worried

I believe they are members of social groups but don't always attend because they don't want to and they only do what they want to do.

I did not know any of this before with regards to education I assumed they were being taught properly until son told me.

Do they socialise at all with other adults/children? I realise lockdowns haven’t helped with this, irrespective of formal education, I consider this important to help them become rounded young people. I don’t think SS are necessary either and agree with others, your son should drive any changes. I’m also surprised, assuming although they live some distance away, you’ve had a relationship with the family, especially your son, you weren’t aware of this before now.

I understand that how Dil brings up her children is 100% up to her. I have no say in that at all.

When it comes to the children's education it's their right being denied and as far as I can see Law being broken.

I too have never played Minecraft but a 7year old on weekdays should be in school or learning proper lessons NOT playing Minecraft from 10am until gone midnight.

Your son is responsible for his children he is supposed to know about his children’s education.

I looked into homeschooling years ago but circumstances made it impossible for me at the time. Home schooling does require work in some structural form to get it done.

Unschooling is your sons way of saying no schooling by the sound of it. Obviously there is a problem with this arrangement if the children cannot read at seven years old.

You should not be testing them this will make them reluctant to see you just support them. Regarding the social services that can only cause damage it’s up to your son to man up and deal with the matter properly.

You may not like her way of bringing up children but they are NOT your children and it’s her decision how to bring them up Your son has only just left and moved to be with you so he has gone along with it for 7 years if he now decides he doesn’t like it it’s up to him to do what he feels he needs to do but be very very careful ....if they are happy, clean, and well fed it really isn’t your business
Your daughter in law sounds as if she has an alternative life style and because it doesn’t fit in with you you can’t go calling SS
I ve never played minecraft but I m told you have to be pretty clever to play it and that it’s a very educational game

They can't read or even write their names. They can't add and don't know basic take aways or recognise letters and numbers. I tested them by playing games and made it look like it was just conversation.

They need a proper teacher in a school and even then, they'll be behind the rest of the class and will need extra intense lessons to catch up

Not all kids perform well when tested, it doesnt mean they are not able to do that.

There used to be a fee paying school, I think called Summerhill, where the children decided whether or not to attend lessons. It’s different certainly but it’s up to your son to sort this out with the childrens’ mother.
Try not to worry.

Bring up children in their own way is one thing but denying them THEIR right to a proper education surely is another.

Dil has a duty to make sure they are educated properly as they can't do this for themselves. If she won't then another responsible adult needs to take over. She is failing them by doing this with their education she can do this style of parenting with them if they go to school at home time and during the holidays like all other parents surely

They need to go to school its the best place for then before it's too late

There are lots of people bringing their children up in this way, their children their choice. Much as you might disagree with it it is not your business and will only result in huge distress for you when you are no longer allowed to see the children at all.