New nanny - feeling a little left out

Personally I wouldn't be contacting them every day - try doing helpful things such as cooking "ready meals" for their freezer (check first they have space).

I think this is a regular cry on Gransnet. Try to find the positives here - they invited you over, you have seen your grandson when asked and your son and daughter-in-law are always lovely. This is a good news.
Do not fixate on what the "other" side of the family is doing and try not to compare.

Congratulations to you all!

It’s very early days Nannyto. May I suggest you don’t message every night. They will be exhausted with a new baby and won’t have the time or energy to respond. Bide your time. Your time will come.

Congratulations on becoming a Nan ?

I would say you are overreacting. Baby is 3 weeks old, so the new parents will be on 24 hour duty settling in and getting to grips with parenthood. They will have friends and other relatives sending them messages, midwife/ health visitors and all the rest of the exhausting cycle. It will be more like chaos than routine. Leave them to settle in.

I have certainly felt a similar thing. I am amazed at how much I love my grandchildren and it is hard when you feel left out.
My DIL is lovely and welcoming but she doesn’t always think about fairness or how I am feeling which is natural. I have decided just to as much as possible be available and loving.
I know that if I had my time again with my mother in law I would have involved her more in our lives.
I hope you are able to see more of your grandchild and your husband is probably right about it being early days.