Late night messages

Some people, kids included, are night owls.

Could your gs be one of those people?

Totally agree HI954

My Mobile lies on my bedside cabinet overnight for safety's sake and because I use it as an easily set alarm. DGS, who sleeps in a downstairs annex, always has his mobile to hand o'night and sometimes uses it to play music if he can't sleep. DGD2, who has dyslexia often plays herself a 'bed-time story on hers. Mum or Dad checks on them before going to bed themselves and switches phone off if necessary.

As folks have said above, it is no different to reading in bed, with or without a torch under the blankets.

I think I’m with Hithere, I don’t think it’s a good idea myself, but it’s not my decision, sadly I also think they have already been exposed to a lot of things I feel are inappropriate, but they can be accessed any time of the day or night.
I came down very heavy handed on two of my granddaughters last year for being on their laptops well into the night, and watching something really unsuitable.
Took their laptops and phones, the next day one granddaughter had her phone returned by her mum, the other one had hers taken away for a month.
I don’t like the way things are, but I think times are changing very fast indeed, and I’m getting left behind.

With WhatsApp. You have to have the app open then it shows “online” wether you are using it or not, until you log out.

I would have a quiet word with your daughter and say not sure if you aware or not. I have a nearly 11yr old granddaughter and a step grandson also nearly a 11 but I’d definitely inform their parents. I no won’t have problem with granddaughter as her parents don’t allow her to use her phone after 8 and it as to stay downstairs. But step-grandson takes his in his room. But yes you don’t know who he’s talking to that late. You hear so many stories of children being groomed.

Yes its best to tell your daughter. My friend's grandchildren are often caught on their gaming machines, this can be at 4am in the morning and then they complain they are too tired to go to school, headaches, tummy aches, etc. The mum mollycoddles them and let's them off school which I find insane. The machines would be out of their bedrooms pronto.

Heavens, he could be looking at anything! And, no, it's not the 2021 equivalent of us Grans reading a book under the covers! Visual matter is quite, quite different. (Unless your 11 year old GS has a very advanced and graphic imagination!) When my grandchildren are in my house either staying the night, or for a meal the no argument rule is mobiles are left on the hall table. I know that when I say, 'Leave your phone on the hall table' they hear 'Leave your severed arm on the hall table' but that's the rule. And, as they all appear to love coming here, I can't see the problem. As for telling your daughter, why not? Someone has to be the grown up these days.

My youngest was a young teen when PCs became widely available, and also fairly basic mobile phones.
I had the computer in the corner of the living room so I could keep an eye on things, and I confiscated her phone so often, that I swear she didn’t have it for longer than she did!
I was constantly worried and on one occasion was tempted to go to the police about some really graphic pictures she was sent, but decided they would probably laugh their heads off.
I didn’t understand it then, and I certainly can’t keep up with it now, we just have to do our best, while accepting it’s probably never going to be good enough

So what if all adults leave phones downstairs overnight... if there was an intruder or fire....how are they going to alert emergency services... unless they all have landlines or security wired to the police

User7777

So what if all adults leave phones downstairs overnight... if there was an intruder or fire....how are they going to alert emergency services... unless they all have landlines or security wired to the police

yes i said that earlier up the thread. This is what our fire safety officer said. People who leave their phones downstairs at night are IDIOTS. Not my words, his.

Nannashirlz

I would have a quiet word with your daughter and say not sure if you aware or not. I have a nearly 11yr old granddaughter and a step grandson also nearly a 11 but I’d definitely inform their parents. I no won’t have problem with granddaughter as her parents don’t allow her to use her phone after 8 and it as to stay downstairs. But step-grandson takes his in his room. But yes you don’t know who he’s talking to that late. You hear so many stories of children being groomed.

does grooming only happen at night?

I would have a quiet but gentle word with your gs first.
If that fails tell him again gently that you will have a chat with his mom.

I would try to gently or jokingly bring it up with GC but certainly wouldn't tell the Mum. Would that not be tantamount to telling tales and maybe jeopardising a good relationship with GC? No way would do that.

Kim19

I would try to gently or jokingly bring it up with GC but certainly wouldn't tell the Mum. Would that not be tantamount to telling tales and maybe jeopardising a good relationship with GC? No way would do that.

I agree.

I am obviously not an 11 year old, but I would be absolutely furious to think that someone was checking up on me and telling others about what I thought I was doing in private. It would completely destroy my relationship with them. I would have felt the same at 11, too.

My grandmother did tell tales on us, and it was awful, as on the whole she didn't have the full story, and it was horribly intrusive.

If you really must get involved, why not have a word with your grandson, and ask him what he was going? The chances are that he will ask how you know, though, so I'd be prepared for that question.

Well said Greenlady my phone is in my pocket all day at work or home and then charges by the side of my bed at night. If there’s an emergency you need to be able to put your hand on it immediately!

I have an 11 year old grandson he’s not allowed his phone to take to bed it’s left charging overnight downstairs

I would be concerned that an 11 year old has a contract phone that allows internet access at any time, never mind at night. I would also be concerned that he is allowed to take his phone to his bedroom at any time at that age. Phones should be used in spaces at home where there are adults to supervise an 11 year old. At bedtime the phone should be switched off and put away. No wonder kids are stressed, suffering mental health issues and surfing unsuitable material, in the main adult content when there is no supervision from parents.

Tell me which phones these days do not have internet connections - very few

The world is based on android and apple devices

Cells can have parental filters to control access to internet.
Even YouTube has an app for kids
Having access to a cell and internet doesnt mean the person is exposed to everything out there

The grandparent mega helicoptering displayed on this thread is astonishing.

Cells are not only to communicate with others - they are calendars, alarm clocks, email, school tools, lifestyle tools (setting up appointments, for example), music streaming devices, netflix/disney+/amazon/hulu, etc

Some parents use cells to track where their kids are, for safety

I am not sure in which world some posters live in.

it is nothing like reading books late under the covers.
it is more akin to going clubbing. by minors.
see eg,
www.talkmurderwithme.com/blog/2020/6/3/breck-bednar

Maybe it was his mother, logged onto the phone he had obediently left downstairs charging, checking what he'd been up to on it and who he had been chatting to.

I would query it as if you were checking it was okay for GS to be on-line at that time of night, you not being sure. If it's not best to have phone left out of room when GS is in bed.

HiPpyChick57

Well said Greenlady my phone is in my pocket all day at work or home and then charges by the side of my bed at night. If there’s an emergency you need to be able to put your hand on it immediately!

well at least two of us are sensible!

greenlady102

User7777

So what if all adults leave phones downstairs overnight... if there was an intruder or fire....how are they going to alert emergency services... unless they all have landlines or security wired to the police

yes i said that earlier up the thread. This is what our fire safety officer said. People who leave their phones downstairs at night are IDIOTS. Not my words, his.

Yes, we’ve started taking our mobiles upstairs at night. We never used to, because we’ve got a landline in the bedroom.
Then I thought, what if an intruder cuts the wire before he breaks in, or a fire burns it! Over active imagination maybe, but our mobiles are now with us. We even have a spare charger.

No. None of your business!