Funny things grandchildren come out with

Good Morning AussieGran59, I agree with you it would be a lovely to read. I have 3 grandchildren our seven year old doesn’t really talk and we dream of the day he does. Our grandaughter on the other hand who is 3 chats for England she is so funny she announced at two year old she knows the word metamorphosis and proceeded to tell us all what it meant!
I always remember my son when he was about 4 in a cafe. He walked up to the next table and said ‘this morning my nana took her teeth out and cleaned them with her toothbrush’ needless to say Nana who was sitting next to me was mortified ?

My dgd was a late talker, and even at two years old she spoke very little. She could still be very amusing in the way she communicated:.

One day, a few weeks into potty training, and after rather an unsuccessful day on that score, she suddenly marched over to the empty potty which was sitting on the floor in readiness. She picked it up, went to the door leading into the hall, and signalled that she wanted it opening.
I did as she wanted, then followed behind as she took it up the stairs and into the bathroom.
In there, she signalled to me that she wanted me to open the door of the large airing cupboard. When I did, she put it on the floor in there (where it was usually kept when not needed), very firmly closed the door and announced a heart-felt "bye-bye" to it.

No amount of words could have made it clearer how she felt about the potty at that moment, and the body language that she used in the lead-up to that "bye-bye was just so funny.

One of my grandchildren was running around I thought she might run into the tv and hurt herself. I told her to calm down and stop it. She ran into the dining room to tell her mum she had been told off for running around.
When her mum asked who told her off her reply was its the one with white curly hair and glasses. There was only me and grandad in the room she didn’t want to name me in case I got into trouble. Every time I see her now I say it’s me with the white curly hair and glasses!.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I think our grandchildren are going to have to be very self confident their future will be a minefield.

3 year old GD got new baby sister recently. Parents hadn't decided on name for a couple of days, but when they had, they told GD the name they had picked. She asked "Is it the same baby as yesterday?"

Our eldest granddaughter, aged about 3 at the time, announced that she was too big Stompers (a sort of movement class) and wanted to go to 'Farty' with her big brother. We eventually worked out that she meant karate.

*too big for stompers.

I decided to embrace the grey, my ten-year-old GD asked on facetime asked where my hair had gone, it sounded as if I had had it shaved off instead of stopping having it coloured.
She also adores duck and DH had made a Duck leg stew, as usual, she picked it up wrong and asked "Is there any more dog log stew left please?" we now all call it Dog leg.

Two from Gdd of still under 3, reported with much mirth by nursery staff.

On being asked what she was doing in the play kitchen, ‘I’m having a glass of wine.’

And the raised arm with a loud, ‘Heil Hitler!’ Luckily staff knew she was at the time addicted to The Sound Of Music*, since she was endlessly singing the songs.

*same as her mother at the same age!

After watching Peppa Pig, my 3 year old grandson was rather taken with Mr Skinny Legs the spider.
Excitable, at a family get-together, he raced around the room telling everyone they were Mr Skinny Legs. When he reached me, he stopped, put his head on one side and said: "You don't have skinny legs, Nana!"

A few years I was telling my gd that when papa and I got married we had no television, washing machine, car and our toilet was out on the landing. She looked at me, pondered a little, then said "Gran in the Roman times". I hasten to add we were married in 1971. To Lucy that was the roman times

My oldest granddaughter at age 3 came home from nursery with a gold star stuck on her top.

My daughter asked what it was for and GD said "Because I'm lovely and special!"

I love that my DGD finds ways of saying words that are hard to get your tongue around hence the conservatory is the consercitory and instructions are inscructions. Somehow the trampoline has become the tramplorine but when I was telling her the story of Moby Dick, suitably sanitised of course, I was explaining how the whale swam round and round the ship to sink it. I said that it was like when you pull the plug out of the bath and....she looked at me very seriously and said, grandma, do you mean a vortex! One of my nieces called shepherds pie deppy die and it is still so named to this day.

When my son was very little - maybe around 3 or 4 - he said, 'Mummy, do you remember when I was in your tummy?' I said yes, a bit surprised as we hadn't really had any talk about babies - then he said 'I was very sad then because it was dark, but I could see the food coming into your tummy but I couldn't eat any of it!' I was lost for words...

My son who was 3 when his little sister was born asked where his Daddy was. I said he’s in the kitchen tidying away the dishes. Well, where’s the baby’s Daddy then? In the kitchen tidying away the dishes. SAME Daddy he said in a tone of outrage! Yes. He didn’t seem to mind sharing his Mummy but was not too happy about sharing his Daddy.

Thanks for making me laugh with all these gems everyone. I’ve had a really bad night and I have sciatica at the moment and these really cheered me up.

One of gd admired my jewellery and I said “I’ll let you have it one day” ….she replied “When you’re dead grandma?” Erm……?

My grandson thought his name was "you" - because that's what we said when we looked at photos of him!
His mother (my daughter) was sick in bed once and never having been sick before she came into me and said "mummy, there's a fly in my bed". I sleepily told her that if she went back now it would have flown away. A couple of minutes later she came back and said it was still there so I had to go and inspect - ugh!. The next day, I kept her off school and suggested we should go for a little walk "to blow the cobwebs away" at which point she burst into tears and exclaimed "but I haven't eaten any cobwebs". Was I a terrible mum?? Hope not!

We had taken DGS6 to an evening theatre performance as a special treat and we brought him back with us for a sleepover afterwards. On coming home and pulling on to the drive he commented that we'd left the hall light on and asked why that was? I explained that it was as a deterrent to possible intruders. After a moments silence he replied "Ah, I see Granny - so, the burglars will think we've spent the evening in the hall!" He's 23 now and I still giggle about how foolish this leaving the hall light on is but we all do it don't we?
Another one from the same Grandson when he was about 3, My husband upon greeting him one day when he came on a visit said " Goodness DGS I'm sure you've grown since I saw you last week!" He replied " Yes Grandad I know I have!" DH asked how he knew that and he replied " Well, when I look down Grandad, my feet are further away than they used to be!"

We had a family day out on the Severn Valley Railway when my youngest GS was about 5. He had been looking out at the River Severn but didn’t realise we had crossed over it on the Victoria Bridge. When it appeared on the other side of the train his shout of “there’s the River Eight” was met with confusion until the penny dropped!

My granddaughter was talking very clearly ( and constantly) from an early age. When she was just less than 3 years old, we ate in a pub. She had ordered ham, egg and chips. When it arrived it was thin sliced packet ham. When the waitress came round and asked if everything was okay with our meals, we all said ‘yes thankyou’. But my granddaughter then pipped up ‘well actually the ham isn’t very yummy’. ? 3 year old food critic!
Another one was when her mum went for a check up while expecting their second baby. As the mid-wife felt her mummy’s tummy, my granddaughter said ‘ be careful there’s a baby in there !’ ?

3 year old GD when asked what we needed from the shops announced we needed cock porn ie popcorn.

so funny