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Grandparenting

Grandson visit with girlfriend

(176 Posts)
CrazyMazy Sat 29-Jul-23 15:18:36

Am I being ‘old fashioned’? Our 16 year old GS has asked to come and stay during the summer holidays with his 15 year old girlfriend. But we only have one spare bedroom. He said he will sleep on our sofa in the lounge. We do allow grandchildren to sleep on the sofa when other family members are staying. His Mum, our DD, says she has checked with the Girlfriend’s family and they are OK with her staying. But I feel uneasy and wish they were a little bit older, certainly over 15, before actually staying as the responsibility is falling on us. Am I being unreasonable and ‘old fashioned’? My DH says if the parents are happy with it then we should let them come and stay. What would you do?

OurKid1 Wed 02-Aug-23 11:58:39

If both sets of parents are ok with it, then presumably they have had the contraceptive chat. If they haven't, then I'm not sure it's your place to do so. Having said that, it comes down to whether you trust your grandson, 16 year old boys being what they are, and whether you are comfortable with the situation. If not, it's your house, so your rules. You are not being unreasonable, especially given their ages.

Callistemon21 Wed 02-Aug-23 10:49:33

Anneeba

Enjoy your time with your grandson and his girlfriend. Blimey O'Riley, what a load of suspicious grans on here. Would any young person, with clearly not old fogie parents, choose to go on a sexual rampage in their grandparents' house? Just enjoy their company. I'm truly staggered by the venom about 'sex', especially as it won't be happening! 🤣

Would any young person, with clearly not old fogie parents, choose to go on a sexual rampage in their grandparents' house!

That made me laugh! 😂
Indeed!

CrazyMazy Wed 02-Aug-23 09:52:20

Yes!

Anneeba Wed 02-Aug-23 09:32:23

Enjoy your time with your grandson and his girlfriend. Blimey O'Riley, what a load of suspicious grans on here. Would any young person, with clearly not old fogie parents, choose to go on a sexual rampage in their grandparents' house? Just enjoy their company. I'm truly staggered by the venom about 'sex', especially as it won't be happening! 🤣

mumofmadboys Wed 02-Aug-23 09:20:44

Relax and enjoy their company. Hope it goes really well.

CrazyMazy Wed 02-Aug-23 09:11:08

Love it Luckygirl13! As I don’t think that DH’s Bran has the same crunch I have put large pack of cornflakes on my shopping list! Less messy than a pail of water over the door - and I might forget it was there!
Seriously though, I feel more comfortable now about their visit. DD has reassured us and that is all we need.

Esmay Wed 02-Aug-23 08:05:54

Too young for sex - I nearly wrote tiddlywinks !

Joseann Tue 01-Aug-23 20:57:21

Luckygirl3

You could always strew cornflakes outside the gf's door each night - that would do it! - crunch, crunch, crunch!

You'd definitely have to hold crunch talks with the couple if it came to this!

Callistemon21 Tue 01-Aug-23 20:45:41

Luckygirl3

You could always strew cornflakes outside the gf's door each night - that would do it! - crunch, crunch, crunch!

I thought it was so funny, anyway, Luckygirl 😁

How strange that some people took it literally 🤔

Callistemon21 Tue 01-Aug-23 20:41:51

Aged 15 is too young

Too young for what?

Hithere Tue 01-Aug-23 19:17:39

Phew

Luckygirl3 Tue 01-Aug-23 19:16:41

I am gobsmacked that anyone might have thought the cornflakes post was serious!!!!

DiamondLily Tue 01-Aug-23 18:25:19

My grandsons and granddaughter, together with partners, often crash here, and I've got no problems. Teenagers do what they do, and always have (thinking back to my misspent yoof 🤐lol).

But, I would draw the line if it's underage - I don't need all that hassle if it goes wrong.

Salti Tue 01-Aug-23 18:23:38

V3ra

I think it's very flattering that your grandson wants to bring his girlfriend to meet you. You must have a very trusting relationship together 🥰

An amusing tale on a slightly different slant:
My brother-in-law at 22 wanted to bring a girlfriend home and stay the night. Mother-in-law refused outright to allow it.

Fast forward a few years: mother-in-law and father-in-law had got divorced, she had a new partner (not married) and was going to stay at brother-in-law's house for the weekend.
He put them in separate bedrooms. She wasn't amused 🤣

gringrinwinkwinkshock

Esmay Tue 01-Aug-23 17:53:14

I wouldn't be happy about it .

Aged 15 is too young .

But , perhaps they are already sexually active ?

I'm told by my three young neighbours that 13 is becoming the norm !

Listening to girls on the bus talking about sex - it seems to me that they know all about it at an early age .

They are guests in your house and if you are not happy - it's best to say so upfront before the nighttime shenanigans commence !

Summerlove Tue 01-Aug-23 17:37:05

Hithere

Cornflakes... you have to be kidding me
So she is restricted in the room no matter what?

Wow, just wow

98.5% sure it was a joke

icanhandthemback Tue 01-Aug-23 10:45:36

Doodledog

This was sorted out several pages ago grin

And so much mistrust for young people who appear to be acting responsibly.

Doodledog Tue 01-Aug-23 10:13:48

This was sorted out several pages ago grin

ginny Tue 01-Aug-23 10:08:09

Katie59

I would be happy for them to visit and stay over but it would be separate bedrooms, they may well be sexually active but not under my roof at that age.

Which is exactly what the boy had said in the first place.

Katie59 Tue 01-Aug-23 09:37:58

I would be happy for them to visit and stay over but it would be separate bedrooms, they may well be sexually active but not under my roof at that age.

Daisydaisydaisy Tue 01-Aug-23 08:53:54

If You aren’t comfortable with it don’t do it 🙂🧡

Oopsadaisy1 Tue 01-Aug-23 05:39:03

It is of course illegal for a 16 yr old to have sex with a 15 yr old.

He wouldn’t want to be accuse of rape and you wouldn’t want it to happen at your home.

VioletSky Tue 01-Aug-23 01:50:38

Lol V3ra

Hithere Tue 01-Aug-23 00:42:33

grin

V3ra Tue 01-Aug-23 00:09:28

I think it's very flattering that your grandson wants to bring his girlfriend to meet you. You must have a very trusting relationship together 🥰

An amusing tale on a slightly different slant:
My brother-in-law at 22 wanted to bring a girlfriend home and stay the night. Mother-in-law refused outright to allow it.

Fast forward a few years: mother-in-law and father-in-law had got divorced, she had a new partner (not married) and was going to stay at brother-in-law's house for the weekend.
He put them in separate bedrooms. She wasn't amused 🤣